1
00:00:00,467 --> 00:00:02,347
I can't be with the woman I love.
2
00:00:02,434 --> 00:00:05,314
And for her, you'd
renounce your god powers?
3
00:00:08,914 --> 00:00:12,154
All right, bring him back.
I said, 'Bring him back'!
4
00:00:12,314 --> 00:00:14,714
What the hell are you doing?
5
00:00:14,874 --> 00:00:18,354
I wanna try something and
I don't want him to see it.
6
00:00:18,474 --> 00:00:19,874
Oh!
7
00:00:19,994 --> 00:00:22,874
Behold, she has power over death.
8
00:00:23,239 --> 00:00:28,399
Damn, my favourite god-on-goddess
porn channel off the air.
9
00:00:28,559 --> 00:00:32,079
He set you up to take this bar
so he could watch us and listen.
10
00:00:32,337 --> 00:00:33,457
I'm gonna kill him.
11
00:00:33,577 --> 00:00:34,937
She's gonna be Frigg?
12
00:00:35,057 --> 00:00:37,417
No, Papatuanuku.
13
00:00:37,657 --> 00:00:42,817
Tomorrow I turn 21 and one of two
things happens... I turn into this
goddess or that goddess.
14
00:00:43,057 --> 00:00:46,337
I then spend the rest of time
with either you, whom I do love,
or Jerome.
15
00:00:46,457 --> 00:00:48,697
Did you just say you love me?
16
00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:56,074
Watch Movies, Series & LiveTV
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17
00:01:24,537 --> 00:01:27,657
Whoo!
18
00:01:27,777 --> 00:01:30,097
Oh, where are you going?
19
00:01:30,257 --> 00:01:34,217
The shower. Then work, to make the
world safe for capitalism through PR.
20
00:01:34,337 --> 00:01:37,017
No. Not yet, you're not.
21
00:01:37,137 --> 00:01:39,017
Huh? Oh.
22
00:01:49,257 --> 00:01:51,657
Just forget about it, Mike.
23
00:01:51,817 --> 00:01:55,817
Doesn't it make you sick to know that
he was watching us the whole time?
24
00:01:57,097 --> 00:02:00,537
Or you could imagine Colin
25
00:02:00,697 --> 00:02:05,497
insane with jealousy, watching the
awesome sex he's missing out on.
26
00:02:07,897 --> 00:02:09,537
Fine.
27
00:02:09,657 --> 00:02:11,897
Can we never leave this bed?
28
00:02:11,977 --> 00:02:14,297
Works for me.
29
00:02:19,177 --> 00:02:21,217
I can cope with that.
30
00:02:21,337 --> 00:02:23,057
Except to eat, obviously.
31
00:02:31,097 --> 00:02:33,217
What are you doing here?
32
00:02:33,337 --> 00:02:35,097
Making sure you're OK.
33
00:02:35,337 --> 00:02:40,017
Plus, for reasons I'm not entirely
clear of, Mike's girlfriend hit me
over the head with The Stick.
34
00:02:40,137 --> 00:02:41,617
So I woke up here.
35
00:02:41,737 --> 00:02:44,017
I told you, it was an accident.
36
00:02:44,177 --> 00:02:48,977
Mm. So, how does it feel
to be mortal all over again?
37
00:02:50,937 --> 00:02:52,657
Happy birthday.
38
00:02:54,737 --> 00:02:57,177
Can we pretend it's not real yet?
39
00:02:57,297 --> 00:03:00,297
Yeah. I can cope with that.
40
00:03:00,457 --> 00:03:03,817
OK, coming in, decent or not.
41
00:03:03,977 --> 00:03:07,197
Because today is goddess day.
42
00:03:07,211 --> 00:03:27,323
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43
00:03:27,737 --> 00:03:29,337
Zeb, you shouldn't have.
44
00:03:29,485 --> 00:03:31,045
F for Frigg.
45
00:03:31,332 --> 00:03:35,132
And Freki. Actual gold,
cos Frigg digs gold.
46
00:03:35,372 --> 00:03:40,012
Maybe Odin could get you the
bracelet it off, seeing he
didn't get you anything.
47
00:03:40,226 --> 00:03:42,546
I said, I've been a bit busy.
48
00:03:42,706 --> 00:03:46,186
Yet somehow I found time to get
kidnapped by a giant and shop.
49
00:03:46,346 --> 00:03:51,466
I told Axl I didn't want anything.
Besides, it's not like it's
certain I'll be Frigg.
50
00:03:51,626 --> 00:03:54,346
I reckon if that's you want,
then that's what you'll be.
51
00:03:58,186 --> 00:04:03,506
Which kinda leads me to I've never
been invited to any god ceremony
ever.
52
00:04:03,626 --> 00:04:06,586
But surely, this one.
53
00:04:06,706 --> 00:04:09,346
I mean, you guys are my flatmates.
54
00:04:10,706 --> 00:04:12,506
Sure. I don't see
a problem with that.
55
00:04:12,626 --> 00:04:16,826
Yes! You're totally gonna get Frigg.
56
00:04:18,346 --> 00:04:19,786
I'll go.
57
00:04:23,466 --> 00:04:24,866
We've come for our girl.
58
00:04:24,986 --> 00:04:26,426
Hi, Stacey.
59
00:04:27,145 --> 00:04:28,265
Come, we're away.
60
00:04:28,385 --> 00:04:29,465
Are we?
61
00:04:29,625 --> 00:04:31,505
Yes! You won't need
anything... it's all sorted.
62
00:04:31,665 --> 00:04:34,185
What is?
Trust me... don't question her.
63
00:04:34,345 --> 00:04:37,385
Where are we going?
Somewhere sacred. Goddess sacred.
64
00:04:37,545 --> 00:04:38,945
Of course you are.
See you guys soon.
65
00:04:39,065 --> 00:04:40,585
Him - yes; him - no.
66
00:04:40,623 --> 00:04:42,383
Eh?
No mortals allowed.
67
00:04:42,503 --> 00:04:43,783
They said I could come.
68
00:04:44,023 --> 00:04:47,103
Well, they were wrong. The arrival
of a goddess is the most holy
of ceremonies
69
00:04:47,263 --> 00:04:50,423
and will not be defiled by
the presence of a mortal.
70
00:04:50,543 --> 00:04:52,063
I'll sit at the back and be quiet.
71
00:04:52,223 --> 00:04:53,663
No, you won't, because
you won't be there.
72
00:04:53,783 --> 00:04:54,663
Sorry, Zeb.
73
00:04:54,823 --> 00:04:56,663
Is there some sort of
after-party I can come to?
74
00:04:56,783 --> 00:04:58,543
No!
75
00:04:58,663 --> 00:05:00,463
So close.
76
00:05:05,383 --> 00:05:07,903
Come to throw an old man
out on the street, have you?
77
00:05:08,023 --> 00:05:09,583
You're not that old.
78
00:05:11,103 --> 00:05:13,863
To what do I owe this charity?
79
00:05:13,983 --> 00:05:16,583
I need you to answer a question.
80
00:05:16,703 --> 00:05:18,183
Dietary fibre.
81
00:05:18,303 --> 00:05:19,583
What?
82
00:05:19,743 --> 00:05:23,423
That's the answer to everything
a decent crap once a day.
83
00:05:26,183 --> 00:05:28,223
How do I kill Loki?
84
00:05:30,183 --> 00:05:35,623
Loki cannot be killed, just as Ullr
cannot be killed, just as Kvasir
cannot be killed
85
00:05:35,743 --> 00:05:37,463
OK, OK, I get the picture.
86
00:05:37,583 --> 00:05:41,143
Your question is moot and idiotic.
87
00:05:41,303 --> 00:05:45,143
How do I kill the vessel
currently containing Loki?
88
00:05:45,263 --> 00:05:49,023
Gun, knife, dodgy seafood.
89
00:05:49,183 --> 00:05:55,223
Vessels are vessels; they come and
go, they're human, they're frail.
90
00:05:55,383 --> 00:05:58,823
He knows I'm coming, and
he's more powerful than me.
91
00:06:02,183 --> 00:06:05,143
How do I nullify Colin's powers?
92
00:06:05,263 --> 00:06:07,823
Loki is all about fire.
93
00:06:09,343 --> 00:06:11,103
What defeats fire?
94
00:06:11,223 --> 00:06:13,303
Water.
95
00:06:13,463 --> 00:06:15,783
And the closest thing
you've got to water?
96
00:06:19,623 --> 00:06:21,063
Ice.
97
00:06:23,823 --> 00:06:26,383
You don't have to worry
about me getting in your way.
98
00:06:26,503 --> 00:06:27,783
You're fine.
99
00:06:27,943 --> 00:06:30,903
You've got mortal things to be
going on with. Like claiming Dawn.
100
00:06:31,063 --> 00:06:34,903
I'm not going to 'claim'
her; I'm going to woo her.
101
00:06:35,063 --> 00:06:37,463
Woo?
Yes.
102
00:06:37,583 --> 00:06:39,423
To win her.
103
00:06:39,543 --> 00:06:43,223
OK. Well, good luck with that.
104
00:06:43,343 --> 00:06:44,943
Thanks.
105
00:06:45,103 --> 00:06:46,983
Do I need to list
all the indignities,
106
00:06:47,143 --> 00:06:50,543
pain and suffering I have endured
for you and your stupid god family?
107
00:06:50,663 --> 00:06:51,863
Please don't.
108
00:06:52,023 --> 00:06:54,463
And now I don't even get an
invite to my flatmate's 21st.
109
00:06:54,623 --> 00:06:57,023
It's not what you'd call
a standard 21st, Zeb.
110
00:06:57,263 --> 00:07:00,543
But it still sucks. When you are
Odin, I want you to turn me into
Freki.
111
00:07:00,703 --> 00:07:04,063
The actual Freki, as in wolf,
so I can bite people.
112
00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:09,863
Serious arse-biting when I'm Freki
that's what I'll be about.
113
00:07:09,983 --> 00:07:11,223
Oh, hey guys.
114
00:07:11,343 --> 00:07:13,143
Freki dog.
115
00:07:13,263 --> 00:07:14,983
We've come for our goddess.
116
00:07:15,063 --> 00:07:16,783
Not here.
117
00:07:16,943 --> 00:07:20,623
She's off with her goddesses, doing
stuff only goddesses are allowed.
118
00:07:20,783 --> 00:07:23,663
Are you hiding her from
me, on this, our day?
119
00:07:23,823 --> 00:07:27,663
Uh, no, and this has still yet
to be proven to be 'your' day.
120
00:07:27,823 --> 00:07:29,183
Well, she needs to
be with her people.
121
00:07:29,303 --> 00:07:30,863
She is with her people, apparently.
122
00:07:31,023 --> 00:07:33,383
No, she's not.
I thought you were that.
123
00:07:33,543 --> 00:07:36,623
Apart from us.
Well, clearly apart from us, Leon.
124
00:07:36,783 --> 00:07:38,823
Well, it turns out I'm
only part of her people.
125
00:07:38,983 --> 00:07:41,703
I thought I was part of her
people too, but not even close.
126
00:07:41,943 --> 00:07:44,943
Look, she has other people
and is with them. Can we
just leave it at that?
127
00:07:45,063 --> 00:07:47,263
But Maui needs his Papatuanuku.
128
00:07:48,623 --> 00:07:53,383
OK, even playing along with the
whole Papatuanuku idea for a second,
she's still not here.
129
00:07:53,623 --> 00:07:58,503
Could you maybe call her on the
telephone? It would be good for
Jerome to know that she is safe.
130
00:07:58,623 --> 00:08:01,023
Yes. Yes, it would.
131
00:08:01,143 --> 00:08:03,143
Fine, whatever.
132
00:08:04,583 --> 00:08:06,943
But they're probably in the
middle of full-on goddess stuff.
133
00:08:08,383 --> 00:08:09,783
Hi.
134
00:08:09,903 --> 00:08:12,303
Hey. It's me. Uh, where are you?
135
00:08:12,423 --> 00:08:14,703
At a secret location
136
00:08:14,823 --> 00:08:17,343
Ingrid has sworn me to keep secret.
137
00:08:17,503 --> 00:08:19,383
Yeah, that's kinda
what I told them.
138
00:08:19,503 --> 00:08:20,423
Which 'them'?
139
00:08:20,543 --> 00:08:21,743
Let me talk to her.
140
00:08:21,863 --> 00:08:23,743
This 'them'.
141
00:08:25,943 --> 00:08:29,023
My destiny.
Oh, hey, Jerome.
142
00:08:29,263 --> 00:08:36,023
There is contemplation we need
to do together before we become
father and mother to our people.
143
00:08:37,343 --> 00:08:39,583
Is there? Michele
wants to speak to you.
144
00:08:39,703 --> 00:08:40,863
Which one is she?
145
00:08:41,023 --> 00:08:43,743
Uh, the one whose goddess
name no one can pronounce.
146
00:08:46,303 --> 00:08:52,663
OK, Maui boy, you might be cute,
but until this afternoon, she is
ours, and if you change that,
147
00:08:52,783 --> 00:08:55,263
I will break you in half.
148
00:08:55,383 --> 00:08:56,903
Kei te pai?
149
00:08:57,063 --> 00:08:59,423
Ae.
Ka pai.
150
00:09:02,263 --> 00:09:04,503
We will wait here until she returns.
151
00:09:04,623 --> 00:09:06,383
But she's not coming back.
152
00:09:06,503 --> 00:09:08,743
Look, I don't trust you, Norseman.
153
00:09:08,863 --> 00:09:10,343
I'm from Hawke's Bay.
154
00:09:10,463 --> 00:09:11,903
So, we shall wait.
155
00:09:13,967 --> 00:09:17,047
I need your help... to deal to Loki.
156
00:09:18,287 --> 00:09:19,487
When you say 'deal to'?
157
00:09:19,647 --> 00:09:23,647
After everything he has done to
this family, he needs to be stopped.
158
00:09:23,807 --> 00:09:27,487
And according to Kvasir,
you're the man for the job.
159
00:09:31,927 --> 00:09:34,167
Did Michele tell
you about last night?
160
00:09:34,287 --> 00:09:36,047
No.
161
00:09:37,967 --> 00:09:40,927
If you're looking for
Hod to help you out,
162
00:09:42,847 --> 00:09:44,367
I'm not him any more.
163
00:09:46,127 --> 00:09:48,007
Bullshit!
164
00:09:48,127 --> 00:09:49,967
I found a way, Mike.
165
00:09:50,127 --> 00:09:52,487
We were supposed to talk
before you did anything!
166
00:09:52,567 --> 00:09:54,007
An opportunity arose.
167
00:09:54,127 --> 00:09:55,927
No. We had a deal.
168
00:09:56,087 --> 00:09:59,727
Mike, I'm the happiest
I've been since I turned 21.
169
00:09:59,967 --> 00:10:03,527
Sorry if it's in the way of your
revenge fantasy, but can you not
just?
170
00:10:03,647 --> 00:10:05,647
This is not about me;
171
00:10:05,807 --> 00:10:08,127
this is about the danger
he poses to our family.
172
00:10:08,287 --> 00:10:10,767
Don't try and turn this
into something noble;
173
00:10:11,007 --> 00:10:15,247
you're pissed off because Colin got
his rocks off watching you boink his
ex-girlfriend.
174
00:10:15,367 --> 00:10:17,647
What he does attacks all of us,
175
00:10:19,487 --> 00:10:22,167
the family that you just betrayed.
176
00:10:22,287 --> 00:10:23,647
'Betrayed'?
177
00:10:23,767 --> 00:10:25,007
Get a grip.
178
00:10:25,167 --> 00:10:30,327
You just turned your back on all
of us. Get used to being alone.
179
00:10:31,727 --> 00:10:35,527
And this is exactly the sort
of shit I will not miss!
180
00:10:37,607 --> 00:10:39,207
How'd it go with the oil guys?
181
00:10:39,367 --> 00:10:41,607
Consider them well
and truly drilled.
182
00:10:41,727 --> 00:10:43,927
Oh! I knew you'd do the business.
183
00:10:44,047 --> 00:10:45,487
Can I have my chair back now?
184
00:10:45,567 --> 00:10:47,807
Um, that depends.
185
00:10:47,927 --> 00:10:49,167
On what?
186
00:10:49,287 --> 00:10:51,007
Whether you'll drill me as well.
187
00:10:51,127 --> 00:10:54,087
Wow, classy double entendre there.
188
00:10:54,327 --> 00:10:59,047
We have just landed hundreds of
thousands of dollars of work.
Don't you wanna celebrate?
189
00:11:01,927 --> 00:11:04,047
This is good tea. What is it?
190
00:11:05,487 --> 00:11:07,327
Tea bag.
Gaia buys it.
191
00:11:07,567 --> 00:11:13,087
So I shall look forward to drinking
it every morning, with Gaia making
it for me.
192
00:11:13,247 --> 00:11:16,727
Good luck with that fantasy, given
that she was in my bed this morning.
193
00:11:16,847 --> 00:11:18,447
Today everything changes.
194
00:11:18,567 --> 00:11:20,327
Or it stays the same.
195
00:11:24,047 --> 00:11:28,887
Hey, where do you guys stand on the
whole 'mortals at the ceremony'
thing?
196
00:11:29,047 --> 00:11:31,447
I'll bet you'll take your
non-god followers with you, right?
197
00:11:31,567 --> 00:11:32,447
No.
198
00:11:32,607 --> 00:11:34,207
Zeb, they're not
taking you with them.
199
00:11:34,327 --> 00:11:35,367
You're not even a Maori.
200
00:11:35,607 --> 00:11:38,567
In fact, you shouldn't even be in
the presence of the true gods of
Aotearoa.
201
00:11:38,687 --> 00:11:40,447
I live here.
202
00:11:40,567 --> 00:11:41,887
Not today. Begone.
203
00:11:42,047 --> 00:11:43,967
You can't 'begone'
me from my own flat.
204
00:11:44,127 --> 00:11:48,287
Zeb, maybe you should take off.
I'll text you with how it goes.
205
00:11:48,407 --> 00:11:50,967
Gee, thanks, mate!
206
00:11:51,087 --> 00:11:53,607
Way to make me feel real wanted!
207
00:11:54,967 --> 00:11:58,767
And to think I was the only one that
got her an actual birthday present.
208
00:12:02,007 --> 00:12:03,847
Leon, why don't you
go do that thing?
209
00:12:05,447 --> 00:12:07,407
Oh, that thing that
we talked heaps about?
210
00:12:07,527 --> 00:12:08,767
Yeah.
211
00:12:08,927 --> 00:12:11,087
Yep. It's a good idea,
good idea, George.
212
00:12:12,247 --> 00:12:14,287
You didn't get her
a present either, eh?
213
00:12:14,407 --> 00:12:16,007
Sure, we did.
214
00:12:18,887 --> 00:12:20,127
Tea?
215
00:12:20,207 --> 00:12:21,647
Hmm? No.
216
00:12:21,767 --> 00:12:23,087
Something stronger?
217
00:12:23,207 --> 00:12:25,007
I'm OK. Nice flowers.
218
00:12:25,127 --> 00:12:27,167
They just arrived - no note.
219
00:12:27,287 --> 00:12:28,807
I thought they might be from you.
220
00:12:28,927 --> 00:12:30,727
Why would I send you flowers?
221
00:12:30,887 --> 00:12:33,647
As an apology, followed
by a retraction.
222
00:12:33,767 --> 00:12:35,647
No, wasn't me.
223
00:12:39,727 --> 00:12:43,167
So, what brings you to my house,
Anders, for the first time ever?
224
00:12:43,327 --> 00:12:45,327
It can't be. I feel like
I've been here many times.
225
00:12:45,447 --> 00:12:47,287
Yet you haven't.
226
00:12:48,487 --> 00:12:50,767
Dawn, can I ask you a question?
227
00:12:52,687 --> 00:12:55,927
I was at the office and thinking
about this question, but you
weren't there to ask.
228
00:12:56,047 --> 00:12:58,527
That would be because you fired me.
229
00:12:58,687 --> 00:13:02,327
As a woman, what is an acceptable
level of sex in a relationship?
230
00:13:03,407 --> 00:13:04,567
Excuse me?
231
00:13:04,807 --> 00:13:08,367
As a woman who's been in
relationships, how often
a day, as a woman, you could say,
232
00:13:08,607 --> 00:13:13,487
before it's nymphomania? I mean,
I got nothing against nymphomania
as an affliction in women
233
00:13:13,727 --> 00:13:19,127
it's much more appealing than having
one giant eyebrow - but it is really
hard work.
234
00:13:19,287 --> 00:13:22,487
My dick hurts, Dawn.
It really really hurts.
235
00:13:25,287 --> 00:13:32,647
The best thing, Anders, about losing
my job, is that I no longer have
to put up with your crap.
236
00:13:32,767 --> 00:13:34,247
You don't know the answer, do you?
237
00:13:35,013 --> 00:13:36,213
You can go now.
238
00:13:40,639 --> 00:13:42,039
You, out.
239
00:13:42,129 --> 00:13:44,129
I've taken enough shit
from the Johnsons for today,
240
00:13:44,202 --> 00:13:46,522
so I'm drinking my beer
whether you like it or not.
241
00:13:46,642 --> 00:13:48,502
Then sit in the corner and drink.
242
00:13:49,016 --> 00:13:50,376
I can do that.
243
00:13:54,776 --> 00:13:56,296
Did you know about Ty?
244
00:13:56,416 --> 00:13:58,336
Becoming an ex-god?
245
00:13:58,456 --> 00:14:00,616
Did you not think to tell me?
246
00:14:00,776 --> 00:14:03,696
Well, this is the first time
I've seen you since last night.
247
00:14:03,816 --> 00:14:05,136
Were you a part of it?
248
00:14:05,376 --> 00:14:08,856
Up until the point where
your girlfriend felled
me with Yggdrasil, yes.
249
00:14:08,976 --> 00:14:10,216
She what?
250
00:14:10,456 --> 00:14:15,336
It's claimed it was an accident, but
I have my doubts. Mike, I have never
seen Ty happier.
251
00:14:15,456 --> 00:14:17,736
What about we're a family of gods?
252
00:14:17,896 --> 00:14:21,656
Well, now Ty is just the kid who's a
little bit different from the rest.
253
00:14:21,816 --> 00:14:23,616
I can't believe you
went along with it.
254
00:14:23,776 --> 00:14:28,336
Hey, I was intrigued to see if what
Kvasir said would work would work.
255
00:14:29,696 --> 00:14:32,376
Kvasir. Of course.
256
00:14:32,536 --> 00:14:35,296
He asked me a question; I answered
it. I don't make the rules.
257
00:14:35,416 --> 00:14:37,416
He put you up to it, didn't he?
258
00:14:37,536 --> 00:14:38,856
'He' who?
259
00:14:39,016 --> 00:14:42,096
Loki. Don't you think it's a wee
bit coincidental at the same time
260
00:14:42,336 --> 00:14:47,376
he's telling me we need Hod to kill
Loki, he's telling Ty how not to be
Hod any more?
261
00:14:47,536 --> 00:14:50,496
OK, Mike, you need to step back.
We're not the killing kind.
262
00:14:50,736 --> 00:14:54,856
Whoa, underground cavern under the
bar-very godlike. Hey, man, I'm
Zeb.
263
00:14:54,976 --> 00:14:56,696
Out! Out! Out!
264
00:14:56,816 --> 00:14:58,576
Hey! What did I do?
265
00:14:58,736 --> 00:15:03,616
In our history, there have always
been those gods more likely to snap
266
00:15:03,776 --> 00:15:07,376
and take out everybody around
them with an assault rifle.
267
00:15:07,496 --> 00:15:09,456
Thanks for that wisdom, Kvasir.
268
00:15:09,576 --> 00:15:11,496
You're welcome.
269
00:15:13,616 --> 00:15:15,096
Ah! Eh?
270
00:15:16,856 --> 00:15:20,056
You know I've got about a thousand
ice-boy jokes that'll go unused now?
271
00:15:20,136 --> 00:15:21,976
Oh. Sorry.
272
00:15:22,096 --> 00:15:24,216
I forgive you.
273
00:15:24,336 --> 00:15:26,376
And I am truly happy for you.
274
00:15:26,536 --> 00:15:30,176
Thank you. Unlike Mike, who thinks
I have defiled family honour.
275
00:15:30,416 --> 00:15:36,456
Mike needs to get over himself. Hey,
when you were with Helen, what was
it like?
276
00:15:37,536 --> 00:15:39,696
Um, brief.
277
00:15:39,776 --> 00:15:41,056
As in not together long.
278
00:15:41,216 --> 00:15:46,056
Yeah, but in that time, did you ever
find her... pushy and demanding?
279
00:15:46,296 --> 00:15:50,016
Don't get me wrong, there's a lot
about Helen that sets her apart
from others.
280
00:15:50,136 --> 00:15:51,496
That she's a goddess?
281
00:15:51,656 --> 00:15:53,816
That she's up for anything,
any time, anywhere.
282
00:15:54,056 --> 00:15:58,136
Which is the problem, cos I'm the
kind of guy that likes things on
my terms. You know what I mean?
283
00:15:58,256 --> 00:16:00,536
I'm your brother - yeah, I know.
284
00:16:00,776 --> 00:16:05,576
Yeah, so when I wake up and realise
that she's making plans for the two
of us, my sphincter... it clenches.
285
00:16:05,696 --> 00:16:07,456
And not in a good way.
286
00:16:08,736 --> 00:16:12,696
Idun and Bragi are destined to
be together... what did you expect?
287
00:16:12,936 --> 00:16:17,696
Does this look like Asgard? I mean,
maybe later when Axl gets his Frigg
on, things'll change,
288
00:16:17,856 --> 00:16:19,896
but we will cross that
bridge when we come to it.
289
00:16:20,016 --> 00:16:21,416
Destined, Anders.
290
00:16:21,576 --> 00:16:23,816
And I can live with that,
but on my terms.
291
00:16:23,976 --> 00:16:26,256
Your idea of being together
is different to Helen's.
292
00:16:26,416 --> 00:16:27,936
Mm-hm. And she needs
to be told that.
293
00:16:28,056 --> 00:16:29,576
And she will not take it well.
294
00:16:29,736 --> 00:16:32,936
Hey, which one of us here
is the god of sweet-talk?
295
00:16:33,056 --> 00:16:35,496
Mm-hm.
296
00:16:35,656 --> 00:16:39,616
Seriously? You got the earth
mother gardening vouchers?
297
00:16:39,776 --> 00:16:42,176
Hey, you try shopping for
Papatuanuku... it's not easy, man.
298
00:16:42,296 --> 00:16:43,736
Yeah, but vouchers?
299
00:16:43,896 --> 00:16:46,136
Everybody loves vouchers
it means you can get what you want.
300
00:16:46,256 --> 00:16:48,176
Yeah, wasting you, paleface!
301
00:16:48,296 --> 00:16:50,376
Not yet, not-as-pale-as-me face.
302
00:16:50,496 --> 00:16:52,336
Why play this? You suck at this.
303
00:16:52,576 --> 00:17:00,376
Hey, Maui doesn't suck at anything.
Because Maui is a trickster, waiting
and lulling while I strike!
304
00:17:02,976 --> 00:17:05,656
Yeah! Taste my Maori power, invader!
305
00:17:05,816 --> 00:17:07,976
Hey, you know what'd be cool?
You not distracting me?
306
00:17:08,216 --> 00:17:12,816
If there was a Maori gods versus
Norse gods video game. That would
be awesome and educational.
307
00:17:17,536 --> 00:17:24,136
I get it Mike, I get your pride
is hurt, but Loki is the one god
we do not wanna go to war with.
308
00:17:24,296 --> 00:17:27,016
So we're to let him treat
us like a bunch of nobodies?
309
00:17:27,256 --> 00:17:32,416
Because next to him, we are a
bunch of nobodies. Our powers
are piss-weak compared to his.
310
00:17:32,536 --> 00:17:33,976
Until Axl gets his powers.
311
00:17:34,136 --> 00:17:37,376
I suspect when that day comes,
we will cease to be the Johnsons
312
00:17:37,616 --> 00:17:43,176
and become a bunch of gods fighting
among ourselves, which is not a lot
different, just more amped.
313
00:17:43,416 --> 00:17:47,176
You will be Ullr, the pretender
to the throne; I will be Baldr,
coolest god ever;
314
00:17:47,336 --> 00:17:49,896
and Loki will
still be an arsehole.
315
00:17:51,696 --> 00:17:57,216
Don't fight the natural order, Mike,
because the natural order is the
natural order.
316
00:18:13,712 --> 00:18:15,712
Hi.
317
00:18:17,552 --> 00:18:23,032
OK, I'm just gonna come out and say
this, because I'm sure if I think
about it, it'll all come out wrong.
318
00:18:24,752 --> 00:18:28,192
I don't want us to
be just friends, Dawn.
319
00:18:28,312 --> 00:18:30,552
I'm sick of that torture, because...
320
00:18:31,952 --> 00:18:35,712
I love you. After all that we've
been through, I love you more
than ever,
321
00:18:35,872 --> 00:18:39,472
and I want us to spend the
rest of our lives together,
322
00:18:39,632 --> 00:18:43,712
starting with that holiday that we
never had and which I've booked
323
00:18:43,952 --> 00:18:50,912
just the two of us, sun and
cocktails with little umbrellas,
somewhere so very warm.
324
00:18:52,872 --> 00:18:55,072
Can we do that? Can...
325
00:18:55,192 --> 00:18:58,112
Can we start over again?
326
00:18:59,712 --> 00:19:01,352
Sorry, who are you?
327
00:19:03,502 --> 00:19:04,582
Sorry?
328
00:19:04,702 --> 00:19:05,822
Who are you?
329
00:19:07,262 --> 00:19:08,422
I'm Ty.
330
00:19:09,822 --> 00:19:13,302
The only Ty I know of
is my ex-boss' brother.
331
00:19:13,422 --> 00:19:15,102
Yes.
332
00:19:15,222 --> 00:19:17,502
Who I've never met.
333
00:19:19,542 --> 00:19:21,422
What?
334
00:19:23,142 --> 00:19:24,782
Did Anders talk to you about me?
335
00:19:24,902 --> 00:19:27,182
No, only about his sore dick.
336
00:19:28,262 --> 00:19:29,342
Did Anders send you to do this?
337
00:19:29,462 --> 00:19:31,902
No. Dawn, it's me
338
00:19:32,102 --> 00:19:34,462
Ty.
Anders' brother... yes, got that.
339
00:19:35,702 --> 00:19:38,862
Does he think that a holiday will
make him firing me somehow feel
better?
340
00:19:39,022 --> 00:19:42,182
Why the hell would I wanna go on
holiday with a man I've never met,
341
00:19:42,422 --> 00:19:46,102
especially one who starts spouting
how much he loves me, on my
doorstep,
342
00:19:46,342 --> 00:19:50,942
the first time I lay eyes on him?
What kind of fucked-up behaviour
is that?
343
00:19:52,342 --> 00:19:54,222
Tell Anders thanks,
344
00:19:54,342 --> 00:19:56,462
but no, thanks.
345
00:20:04,622 --> 00:20:06,222
You've been busy.
346
00:20:06,462 --> 00:20:11,102
If I'm going to become a hugely
powerful goddess today, I should
have something nice to wear.
347
00:20:11,262 --> 00:20:13,422
Fair enough.
Where have you been?
348
00:20:13,502 --> 00:20:15,022
Do you need to know where I've been?
349
00:20:16,622 --> 00:20:18,142
Not if you don't want to tell me.
350
00:20:18,262 --> 00:20:19,662
Good.
351
00:20:19,782 --> 00:20:21,622
Glad we've got that sorted.
352
00:20:22,822 --> 00:20:24,342
Oh, hey, I've been thinking.
353
00:20:24,502 --> 00:20:27,022
Ooh! Is that so?
Uh, about us.
354
00:20:27,262 --> 00:20:31,622
I guessed as much from the way that
you said, 'I've been thinking' in
the tone that usually precedes,
355
00:20:31,782 --> 00:20:33,342
'and I think we should
call it a day.'
356
00:20:33,462 --> 00:20:35,742
No, no, no. No way.
357
00:20:35,902 --> 00:20:39,662
But I do think it wouldn't hurt if
we took a step back for a minute.
358
00:20:39,782 --> 00:20:42,662
Step back? From what?
359
00:20:42,782 --> 00:20:44,582
Is there a ledge we're standing on?
360
00:20:44,742 --> 00:20:47,782
OK. Don't get me wrong... the last
few days have been the most amazing,
361
00:20:48,022 --> 00:20:52,822
most intense relationship I've ever
had, and I most definitely do not
want it to end. Uh, it's...
362
00:20:54,422 --> 00:20:59,422
OK, think of it like this... you
go to the most amazing restaurant,
you have the most amazing meal,
363
00:20:59,582 --> 00:21:01,982
and to top it off, you have
the most amazing creme brulee.
364
00:21:02,142 --> 00:21:05,942
In fact, it is so amazing you
order a second creme brulee.
365
00:21:06,182 --> 00:21:09,542
But here's the thing... halfway
through the second creme brulee
you stop,
366
00:21:09,702 --> 00:21:13,902
and you think, 'Oh, no,
that's too much of a good thing.'
367
00:21:18,422 --> 00:21:19,822
You see what I mean?
368
00:21:19,942 --> 00:21:22,022
I'm a second creme brulee?
369
00:21:22,262 --> 00:21:26,862
No, we're each other's second creme
brulee. Which is why I think we need
to take a break between courses.
370
00:21:27,102 --> 00:21:33,702
So that when we are together it'll
be this rare and beautiful and
special thing.
371
00:21:33,822 --> 00:21:36,502
Like the first creme brulee?
372
00:21:36,662 --> 00:21:40,302
Exactly. This is good,
Helen... trust me.
373
00:21:40,542 --> 00:21:43,942
If we can get this right, then
who knows what the future will
hold for us?
374
00:21:47,142 --> 00:21:49,622
I'm gonna go home
375
00:21:49,742 --> 00:21:52,742
and get ready for this thing.
376
00:21:52,862 --> 00:21:54,622
Absolutely.
377
00:21:59,302 --> 00:22:02,582
If today is about us goddesses all
being beautiful and strong together
378
00:22:02,702 --> 00:22:03,982
Which it is.
379
00:22:04,142 --> 00:22:06,622
How come Helen
goddess isn't here?
380
00:22:07,942 --> 00:22:13,222
Well, she's new to the rank, so she
hasn't fully been incorporated yet.
381
00:22:14,462 --> 00:22:15,942
You forgot to invite her.
382
00:22:16,062 --> 00:22:17,342
Plus she's a bitch.
383
00:22:17,462 --> 00:22:19,142
No, I'm sure she's not.
384
00:22:19,302 --> 00:22:21,622
You hate her because she's
more powerful than you.
385
00:22:21,742 --> 00:22:23,982
Or so she thinks.
386
00:22:24,102 --> 00:22:25,462
True that.
387
00:22:26,702 --> 00:22:28,702
What do you mean?
388
00:22:28,942 --> 00:22:34,502
Whatever happens today, Gaia
whether you become Frigg or
you go to the brown side
389
00:22:34,622 --> 00:22:35,982
I want you to remember
390
00:22:36,142 --> 00:22:37,302
No, none of that
stuff today, Michele.
391
00:22:37,462 --> 00:22:41,182
I want you to remember
that in us, you have allies.
392
00:22:42,622 --> 00:22:44,062
Why will I need allies?
393
00:22:44,182 --> 00:22:46,182
Oracle Ingrid?
394
00:22:47,542 --> 00:22:49,262
In a world of gods,
395
00:22:49,382 --> 00:22:51,902
it's always good to have allies.
396
00:22:54,102 --> 00:22:55,702
Is it too early to have a drink?
397
00:22:55,782 --> 00:22:57,502
No!
398
00:23:00,142 --> 00:23:02,582
Another one, thanks.
I told you... we're closing.
399
00:23:02,822 --> 00:23:08,662
Oh, of course. I'm not allowed to
go to the thing, I can't go home,
I can't go down to the cool dungeon,
400
00:23:08,822 --> 00:23:11,662
I can't stay here... talk
about feeling wanted!
401
00:23:11,822 --> 00:23:15,262
Aw, let him stay, Mike. How much
can one runt drink while we're gone?
402
00:23:17,302 --> 00:23:20,702
Oh, and if you're thinking of going
to the thing, you're his kind now.
403
00:23:23,742 --> 00:23:25,142
She didn't know me.
404
00:23:25,262 --> 00:23:26,582
Who?
405
00:23:26,702 --> 00:23:27,822
Dawn.
406
00:23:29,462 --> 00:23:31,302
She had absolutely
no idea who I was.
407
00:23:33,702 --> 00:23:35,462
I meant nothing to her.
408
00:23:35,622 --> 00:23:39,382
Tell me about it, buddy.
I know that feeling in bucketloads.
409
00:23:39,542 --> 00:23:42,262
Wait. Zeb, do you
know who this man is?
410
00:23:43,742 --> 00:23:46,022
No.
It's Ty.
411
00:23:46,142 --> 00:23:49,062
Oh. As in your brother?
412
00:23:52,622 --> 00:23:53,782
Intriguing.
413
00:23:54,022 --> 00:23:58,542
He's not a god... why should I answer
bloody questions about him? He means
nothing to us.
414
00:23:58,662 --> 00:24:01,302
Because I'm a god and I'm asking.
415
00:24:01,422 --> 00:24:03,142
How come no one remembers Ty?
416
00:24:03,262 --> 00:24:04,862
Well, you remember him, don't you?
417
00:24:05,022 --> 00:24:07,142
Yes.
So what does it matter?
418
00:24:07,262 --> 00:24:08,742
It matters to me!
419
00:24:08,982 --> 00:24:13,542
The only thing that made him matter
was that he was a god. And now he's
not a god, he doesn't matter!
420
00:24:13,662 --> 00:24:15,102
Not to them, anyway.
421
00:24:15,222 --> 00:24:16,702
What 'them'?
422
00:24:16,862 --> 00:24:19,502
The billions that aren't
us... the... insects.
423
00:24:19,662 --> 00:24:22,462
Mortals?
Gone... poof!
424
00:24:22,582 --> 00:24:24,742
Forgotten.
425
00:24:24,862 --> 00:24:26,862
But Dawn didn't know I was a god.
426
00:24:27,102 --> 00:24:33,742
Oh, yes, she did. Deep
down in that part of her brain
that used to worship us,
427
00:24:33,982 --> 00:24:40,302
that used to use us to explain their
primitive world, she recognized you
as a god.
428
00:24:40,462 --> 00:24:44,782
They all do. But then,
when you stopped being a god,
429
00:24:45,022 --> 00:24:49,822
their ape brains can't cope with
that fundamental shift, and so
they just delete you.
430
00:24:51,382 --> 00:24:54,422
Delete, delete, delete,
delete, delete.
431
00:24:55,982 --> 00:25:01,142
Whereas to us you will forever
be the traitor that turned
on his own kind.
432
00:25:04,262 --> 00:25:06,782
Why didn't you tell me any of this?
433
00:25:06,902 --> 00:25:08,862
You didn't ask.
434
00:25:11,982 --> 00:25:13,862
Hey! Hey! Argh!
435
00:25:17,182 --> 00:25:18,142
Baldr!
436
00:25:19,542 --> 00:25:21,182
Baldr!
437
00:25:28,342 --> 00:25:31,502
As much as this would make the
world a better place right now,
438
00:25:31,662 --> 00:25:34,662
unfortunately, I'm all
about peace and love.
439
00:25:39,781 --> 00:25:42,541
Does it have to be a Ford?
I'm a Holden man.
440
00:25:42,588 --> 00:25:44,188
Fjord, dude, like in Fiordland.
441
00:25:44,348 --> 00:25:47,868
Oh, I wondered why te Waka
a Maui's Utu was paddling up a Ford
442
00:25:48,028 --> 00:25:50,768
looking for the lost Patu of Tane
to defeat the Hammer of Thor.
443
00:25:50,831 --> 00:25:54,031
Shh. So the berserkers,
444
00:25:54,191 --> 00:25:56,871
they drop from the cliff, on to
a waka and have a battle sequence.
445
00:25:57,031 --> 00:25:59,751
And if you're playing a Maori
god, you use a taiaha...
446
00:25:59,911 --> 00:26:01,591
And if you're playing
a Norse god, you use an axe.
447
00:26:01,711 --> 00:26:03,151
That's right.
448
00:26:03,391 --> 00:26:06,751
Ah, but all the Norse guy has to do
is chop out the bottom of the waka,
and then it'll sink.
449
00:26:06,991 --> 00:26:12,231
Unless a Ngai Tahu submarine
surfaces and rescues the
Maori warriors.
450
00:26:12,351 --> 00:26:13,551
No, no, no, no, no, no!
451
00:26:13,791 --> 00:26:18,671
When you fullas are
ready, there's a thing that needs
to be sorted.
452
00:26:20,031 --> 00:26:22,271
We shall talk after my ascension.
453
00:26:23,431 --> 00:26:27,551
It will be good for our peoples
to co-exist on a creative level.
454
00:26:30,991 --> 00:26:32,271
I'll change in the bathroom.
455
00:26:32,391 --> 00:26:33,631
Mm-hm.
456
00:26:33,711 --> 00:26:35,471
Te dunny a Maui.
457
00:26:36,831 --> 00:26:39,911
Don't you dare think about doing
this game without us, all right?
458
00:26:40,151 --> 00:26:44,231
You don't get to be Maori these days
without knowing a couple of kick-ass
copyright lawyers.
459
00:26:47,231 --> 00:26:49,591
I'm gonna be very late to
this ceremony because of you.
460
00:26:49,711 --> 00:26:51,191
I need a favour.
461
00:26:51,351 --> 00:26:53,911
For you, my mortal brother,
anything that is in my power.
462
00:26:54,071 --> 00:26:56,231
I need you to do your
Bragi thing on Dawn.
463
00:26:56,351 --> 00:26:57,831
But you hate me doing that.
464
00:26:57,951 --> 00:26:59,431
I know, but I can't think of...
465
00:26:59,591 --> 00:27:01,351
You mean coming back
to work for me, right?
466
00:27:01,511 --> 00:27:03,951
If that's what it takes, yes.
But you hate her working for me.
467
00:27:04,071 --> 00:27:06,191
I hate the idea of her leaving more.
468
00:27:08,831 --> 00:27:10,831
Why do you need me to do this?
469
00:27:10,991 --> 00:27:14,111
Why can't you just
'woo' her into staying?
470
00:27:15,591 --> 00:27:21,031
An unfortunate side effect of me
losing my godliness is that Dawn
has wiped me from her memory banks.
471
00:27:21,271 --> 00:27:27,231
Oh, that is genius!
And she... She has
no idea who you are?
472
00:27:28,391 --> 00:27:31,031
To her I'm your brother
she's vaguely heard about,
473
00:27:31,271 --> 00:27:35,031
who turned up on her doorstep for
the first time today and made a
dick of himself.
474
00:27:35,191 --> 00:27:39,631
Oh no! Oh, this is,
uh... Oh, this is too good.
475
00:27:39,751 --> 00:27:41,991
Are you gonna help me or not?
476
00:27:43,311 --> 00:27:49,111
As I said before, Ty, for you,
I will do absolutely everything
that is in my power.
477
00:27:50,431 --> 00:27:53,071
OK, I am on a bit of a timeline
here, so this will not take long.
478
00:27:53,191 --> 00:27:55,631
Can you put in a good word for me?
479
00:27:55,871 --> 00:28:00,711
Are you now asking me to abuse my
powers so you can get your end away?
That's morally dodgy...
480
00:28:00,831 --> 00:28:02,591
but for you, bro... Eh?
481
00:28:15,191 --> 00:28:16,511
Hi, Dawn.
482
00:28:16,671 --> 00:28:19,151
I do not care, Anders,
if your dick is falling off.
483
00:28:19,391 --> 00:28:23,991
I have had a gutsful of you
and your family today. What
is wrong with your brother?
484
00:28:24,111 --> 00:28:25,431
What was that all about?
485
00:28:25,671 --> 00:28:29,671
Forget him... he's the special-needs
kid of the family. I just wanna say
one thing.
486
00:28:29,791 --> 00:28:31,111
What?
487
00:28:31,351 --> 00:28:35,151
You should think, Dawn, about what
was really going on when you decided
to quit your job.
488
00:28:35,271 --> 00:28:36,631
But you fired me.
489
00:28:36,871 --> 00:28:41,231
You were upset and feeling
threatened, but there was no need.
It was all a storm in a teacup.
490
00:28:41,471 --> 00:28:45,591
You know what'd be wonderful?
You could see your mistake,
be big enough to change your mind,
491
00:28:45,831 --> 00:28:49,671
and come back to where you will
always be the only one I can
truly rely on.
492
00:28:49,791 --> 00:28:52,231
Will you do that for me, Dawn?
493
00:28:52,471 --> 00:28:57,031
Will you forget this whole 'moving
to Putaruru to look after your mum'
nonsense and come back to me?
494
00:28:57,151 --> 00:28:59,071
My mum was actually quite chuffed
495
00:28:59,231 --> 00:29:02,471
I need you too Dawn. I need
you more than anyone else alive.
496
00:29:03,951 --> 00:29:06,231
Um, yeah, sure.
497
00:29:06,351 --> 00:29:07,951
I'll be in tomorrow.
498
00:29:08,191 --> 00:29:13,151
Love you heaps. Oh, and one more
thing... my brother Ty, he's not such
a bad guy, once you get to know him.
499
00:29:13,311 --> 00:29:15,871
But there is one thing you
should be aware of about him.
500
00:29:19,911 --> 00:29:22,311
OK, right.
501
00:29:22,431 --> 00:29:24,351
OK. See you at the office.
502
00:29:27,511 --> 00:29:32,551
All good. And I did your groundwork
for you, so don't worry. Home, James.
503
00:30:00,311 --> 00:30:02,631
Come on, Leon. My bride awaits.
504
00:30:03,911 --> 00:30:05,391
It won't start.
505
00:30:05,511 --> 00:30:06,631
Turn the key.
506
00:30:06,751 --> 00:30:08,551
He is turning the key, Jerome.
507
00:30:08,671 --> 00:30:10,191
Get out and fix it, then, eh?
508
00:30:10,351 --> 00:30:13,311
And get grease all
over my hired suit? Nah!
509
00:30:13,431 --> 00:30:14,871
Punga, call us a taxi.
510
00:30:14,991 --> 00:30:16,911
What, are we made of money now?
511
00:30:17,031 --> 00:30:19,071
Is there a problem?
512
00:30:19,191 --> 00:30:21,991
No, no, no. Nah, we're, um...
513
00:30:22,111 --> 00:30:23,911
We're good.
514
00:30:25,471 --> 00:30:27,671
Any chance of a lift?
515
00:30:27,791 --> 00:30:29,391
Does Maui want a lift?
516
00:30:30,671 --> 00:30:32,551
Oh, come on, Jerome.
Don't be a muzz.
517
00:30:37,951 --> 00:30:43,111
A, uh... A lift would be an
acceptable show of goodwill
between our peoples.
518
00:30:43,271 --> 00:30:45,751
Yes, please.
Thank you.
519
00:30:48,911 --> 00:30:50,591
I don't wanna be late.
520
00:30:50,751 --> 00:30:53,191
You really don't know anything
about goddesses, do you?
521
00:30:56,751 --> 00:30:58,191
This is ridiculous.
522
00:30:58,351 --> 00:31:01,751
I made these for us to wear for
Gaia. It's her day, not yours.
523
00:31:01,991 --> 00:31:06,271
We're wearing them because you never
found out you were a goddess for
years, so you never had a 'day'.
524
00:31:06,391 --> 00:31:08,391
That is so untrue.
525
00:31:08,511 --> 00:31:10,991
Olaf will so get off on this look.
526
00:31:11,111 --> 00:31:12,991
It's for Gaia, Stacey.
527
00:31:13,111 --> 00:31:14,991
For Gaia!
528
00:31:17,951 --> 00:31:20,271
Choice. Like Cinderella...
529
00:31:21,471 --> 00:31:23,391
on acid.
530
00:31:33,311 --> 00:31:38,471
And before you slam the door in my
face, can I please say how sorry I
am about before?
531
00:31:38,711 --> 00:31:45,031
It was a stupid joke that Anders
put me up to, and it was wrong,
and I never should have done it.
532
00:31:45,151 --> 00:31:48,071
So by way of an apology, I...
533
00:31:50,031 --> 00:31:51,791
I don't think so.
534
00:31:53,031 --> 00:31:54,991
Dawn.
535
00:31:58,296 --> 00:31:59,696
And I'll fight today.
536
00:31:59,696 --> 00:32:00,816
You're quite late.
537
00:32:01,056 --> 00:32:03,936
Yes, I am. And I will just get
changed and then we will be on
our way.
538
00:32:04,056 --> 00:32:05,976
Or we could skip it, stay here.
539
00:32:06,136 --> 00:32:07,936
Uh, I think our
presence is required.
540
00:32:08,056 --> 00:32:09,776
Oh, we don't need them.
541
00:32:09,936 --> 00:32:13,136
- Odin and Frigg...
- Wet and wetter.
542
00:32:13,296 --> 00:32:16,296
They have nothing compared
to what you and I have,
543
00:32:16,536 --> 00:32:21,816
and if they choose to call our power
to account, then so be it. Because
we shall prevail.
544
00:32:21,936 --> 00:32:23,376
You been drinking?
545
00:32:23,616 --> 00:32:29,816
I've been thinking, Anders, about
what you said... all that creme
brulee shit. And you are wrong.
546
00:32:29,976 --> 00:32:32,976
Thousands of years of
existence leading to now
547
00:32:33,136 --> 00:32:36,536
cannot be cast aside because you
are having adjustment anxiety.
548
00:32:38,336 --> 00:32:42,056
Idun and Bragi, Bragi and Idun.
549
00:32:42,296 --> 00:32:47,896
I will not let you deny what we are.
Not until you've seen the heights
that we can climb together.
550
00:32:48,056 --> 00:32:50,496
OK. Just... Will you
hold that thought?
551
00:32:52,199 --> 00:32:53,199
Hello?
552
00:32:53,287 --> 00:32:54,487
It's Natalie.
553
00:32:54,607 --> 00:32:56,567
Uh, hi, Natalie. Come on up.
554
00:32:56,727 --> 00:33:00,447
Two minutes to get rid of her, we go
to this thing, and we'll talk after.
555
00:33:00,567 --> 00:33:02,847
As you command, My Lord Bragi.
556
00:33:05,967 --> 00:33:08,727
Natalie! Maybe where you come
from this passes as humour
557
00:33:08,967 --> 00:33:14,687
Sancte Michael Archangele, defende
nos in proelio contra nequitiam et
insidias diaboli esto praesidium.
558
00:33:14,807 --> 00:33:16,647
I have no idea what you're saying.
559
00:33:16,807 --> 00:33:18,967
It's the prayer to St
Michael the Archangel.
560
00:33:19,127 --> 00:33:21,167
Ironically, I went to a very
Catholic girl's school.
561
00:33:21,287 --> 00:33:22,607
You need to leave now.
562
00:33:22,727 --> 00:33:24,487
What's the exorcism prayer for?
563
00:33:24,647 --> 00:33:27,607
Because he is a demon who
must be driven from the world.
564
00:33:27,727 --> 00:33:29,447
Oh, come on, that's a bit harsh.
565
00:33:29,607 --> 00:33:32,647
And I will destroy your high
places and cut down your images
566
00:33:32,887 --> 00:33:38,247
and cast your carcasses upon the
carcasses of your idols, and my
soul shall abhor you.
567
00:33:40,287 --> 00:33:43,087
If this is about me not remembering
you from Norway, I am
568
00:33:43,327 --> 00:33:50,047
There is only one God, and Anders
and his kind are abominations who
must be cleansed from the Earth.
569
00:33:51,967 --> 00:33:54,127
I think she knows
you're a god, Anders.
570
00:33:54,287 --> 00:33:59,527
Oh, and actually, you'll find there
are two gods in this very room.
571
00:34:04,007 --> 00:34:06,327
Idun. And proud of it.
572
00:34:06,487 --> 00:34:09,927
So you should put your
little bow-and-arrow gun down
573
00:34:10,087 --> 00:34:13,887
and go back to whatever cult of
religious whackjobs sent you here
574
00:34:14,047 --> 00:34:17,127
and let them know that we are
real and that we know the truth.
575
00:34:17,247 --> 00:34:18,887
Ashtoreth.
576
00:34:18,967 --> 00:34:20,487
Holy fuck!
577
00:34:23,447 --> 00:34:25,007
Oh!
578
00:34:45,327 --> 00:34:49,607
This is a good place. I can feel my
ancestors talking to me through my
feet.
579
00:34:49,727 --> 00:34:52,127
Through your arse, more like.
580
00:34:52,287 --> 00:34:54,767
She said to go to where
the land meets the water.
581
00:34:54,887 --> 00:34:56,807
The edge.
582
00:34:57,007 --> 00:34:58,807
And then what?
Well, I guess we wait.
583
00:34:58,927 --> 00:35:01,527
For goddesses? Settle in, boys.
584
00:35:05,527 --> 00:35:07,487
Tai...
585
00:35:07,607 --> 00:35:09,407
ka riri.
586
00:35:09,567 --> 00:35:12,367
Tai ka ruu.
Wiri wiri ana te ao.
587
00:35:14,007 --> 00:35:15,887
OK! Hurry! Not much time!
588
00:35:16,007 --> 00:35:17,647
Takarure rure nei ee.
589
00:35:17,887 --> 00:35:24,607
OK! Lovely, lovely haka, boys. Thank
you, but excuse us if we don't go
the full protocol.
590
00:35:24,727 --> 00:35:26,447
Uh, is everybody here?
591
00:35:26,607 --> 00:35:30,327
Uh, we're waiting on Anders, who
is presumably has Helen with him.
592
00:35:30,447 --> 00:35:31,867
And Ty.
593
00:35:31,874 --> 00:35:33,415
Ty's not a god any more.
594
00:35:34,047 --> 00:35:37,167
What?! Why does no one
ever tell me this stuff?
595
00:35:37,649 --> 00:35:39,249
You look beautiful.
596
00:35:39,369 --> 00:35:41,089
Thank you, Jerome.
597
00:35:42,529 --> 00:35:45,249
Yeah, really beautiful.
598
00:35:45,369 --> 00:35:47,249
Thank you, Axl.
599
00:35:48,809 --> 00:35:51,689
We got you a birthday present.
It's not much, but...
600
00:35:54,809 --> 00:35:56,169
Happy birthday.
601
00:35:56,289 --> 00:35:57,769
Oh, thanks.
602
00:35:59,089 --> 00:36:01,209
No, no. Nah. Nah.
603
00:36:03,129 --> 00:36:05,489
What did you get her?
Shut up.
604
00:36:07,809 --> 00:36:09,769
Garden vouchers... cool.
605
00:36:09,929 --> 00:36:13,449
They, uh... They
symbolise Papatuanuku.
606
00:36:13,569 --> 00:36:15,449
He's good.
607
00:36:17,569 --> 00:36:21,129
Were you going to tell me about
your role in Ty's change of status?
608
00:36:21,369 --> 00:36:25,969
I thought he should be the
one giving you the good news.
Do you have a problem with it?
609
00:36:26,129 --> 00:36:29,129
Yeah, I do, actually.
It's what he wanted.
610
00:36:29,289 --> 00:36:31,889
There's a bigger picture.
Oh shit, who invited him?
611
00:36:32,009 --> 00:36:34,889
Greetings, haere mai
612
00:36:35,049 --> 00:36:40,689
to you gods and would-be gods of
all sizes, shapes, genders and hues.
613
00:36:40,849 --> 00:36:44,489
Who's this cock?
Loki. But 'cock' covers it.
614
00:36:44,729 --> 00:36:49,609
And there they are... my favourite
couple. Do you know you've gone
internet viral?
615
00:36:49,769 --> 00:36:52,729
I'll fucking kill you! You hear me?
Hey! Hey!
616
00:36:52,889 --> 00:36:56,369
I will ruin you!
No! No! No! No! Stop this!
617
00:36:56,489 --> 00:36:58,849
Right now! Do you hear me?
618
00:36:59,089 --> 00:37:06,289
This is about Gaia. It is her day,
and I will not have it ruined by
gods killing other gods!
619
00:37:06,409 --> 00:37:08,729
Now, do you hear me?! Hmm?
620
00:37:13,249 --> 00:37:16,729
Right. The ceremony
is about to begin.
621
00:37:35,009 --> 00:37:37,849
Excuse me. Are those, um...?
622
00:37:38,009 --> 00:37:40,489
Are they sacred scrolls?
623
00:37:40,649 --> 00:37:44,929
It's an astrological chart from
the web... Gaia's time of birth.
624
00:37:45,049 --> 00:37:46,529
Oh.
625
00:37:47,809 --> 00:37:49,489
Music.
626
00:37:49,609 --> 00:37:52,049
We must immerse now.
627
00:37:52,209 --> 00:37:54,089
In there?
Yes.
628
00:37:54,249 --> 00:37:59,529
May the blessings of Rangi rain
down upon you, my Papatuanuku.
629
00:38:01,249 --> 00:38:03,409
Uh, petals. Petals.
630
00:38:26,169 --> 00:38:28,729
Wow, Anders does not look happy.
631
00:38:28,889 --> 00:38:30,969
Mad Christian psycho bitch
who wants to kill us all!
632
00:38:31,089 --> 00:38:32,209
What?
633
00:38:32,369 --> 00:38:36,249
Insane Bible-quoting, uh, woman
Natalie... with a fucking crossbow,
634
00:38:36,409 --> 00:38:40,169
fucking shot Helen through the
fucking heart! She is dead! Fuck!
635
00:38:40,249 --> 00:38:41,809
She killed Idun?
636
00:38:41,929 --> 00:38:43,129
Yes! Right in front of my eyes!
637
00:38:43,249 --> 00:38:44,729
Ohhh. Not good.
638
00:38:44,889 --> 00:38:46,529
Why?
Constant goddess.
639
00:38:46,649 --> 00:38:48,609
No, why kill Helen?
640
00:38:48,849 --> 00:38:52,209
She was trying to kill me,
then she killed Helen first,
so I got the fuck out of there!
641
00:38:52,329 --> 00:38:53,889
And you came here?
642
00:38:54,009 --> 00:38:56,169
Yes, to warn you!
643
00:38:56,249 --> 00:38:58,129
Oh, great work, Anders!
644
00:38:58,249 --> 00:39:00,249
We can't stop the ceremony.
645
00:39:00,369 --> 00:39:03,369
Uh, stay here. Do not follow me.
646
00:39:06,089 --> 00:39:07,409
Maybe we should just flag this.
647
00:39:07,529 --> 00:39:09,849
No. We must know.
648
00:39:09,969 --> 00:39:13,089
No, the light is almost upon you.
649
00:39:20,449 --> 00:39:21,889
Who are you?
650
00:39:22,009 --> 00:39:23,769
You're his brother.
651
00:39:23,889 --> 00:39:24,969
Yes.
652
00:39:25,089 --> 00:39:26,689
Abomination.
653
00:40:02,369 --> 00:40:04,289
Which one are you?
654
00:40:08,729 --> 00:40:10,289
I'm Ullr.
655
00:40:10,529 --> 00:40:17,329
Thus saith the Lord God,
smite with thine hand and alas for
the evil abominations shall fall...
656
00:40:24,489 --> 00:40:26,689
BOOM!
657
00:40:31,289 --> 00:40:37,369
I love how they pause to quote
scripture before the kill
makes them sitting ducks.
658
00:40:37,489 --> 00:40:38,809
Who was she?
659
00:40:39,049 --> 00:40:44,209
A god-hunter, Mikkel. One of those
who feel we mess with the unnatural
order of things.
660
00:40:44,449 --> 00:40:48,689
Clearly your dipshit brother
blundering around the north has
alerted them to our presence here.
661
00:40:48,929 --> 00:40:54,849
Well done, the Johnsons! In fact,
on behalf of all non-Johnson gods
here in NZ,
662
00:40:55,089 --> 00:40:59,729
I should wipe your miserable
family off the face of the planet,
save the god-hunters the trouble.
663
00:40:59,849 --> 00:41:01,449
No.
664
00:41:01,529 --> 00:41:03,929
Ah. Here she is
665
00:41:05,009 --> 00:41:06,569
the most powerful goddess in town.
666
00:41:06,689 --> 00:41:08,049
You bet your arse I am.
667
00:41:08,169 --> 00:41:10,049
And don't I know it,
668
00:41:10,289 --> 00:41:15,969
even if he doesn't. But fair call.
Come on... let's get back. We'll
miss the best bit.
669
00:41:17,649 --> 00:41:20,569
Ooh, and do remember
670
00:41:21,969 --> 00:41:24,449
you owe me your life.
You still wanna kill me?
671
00:41:25,809 --> 00:41:27,329
More than ever.
672
00:41:27,449 --> 00:41:30,289
Where's the gratitude
673
00:41:30,409 --> 00:41:32,369
that's what I want to know.
674
00:41:47,769 --> 00:41:51,209
This is way more choice than
mine was in the garden shed.
675
00:42:21,489 --> 00:42:24,969
And behold... a new
goddess walks among us.
676
00:42:43,209 --> 00:42:44,729
What?
677
00:42:44,849 --> 00:42:46,689
My Lord Bragi,
678
00:42:48,089 --> 00:42:50,369
it is I, Idun.
679
00:42:50,489 --> 00:42:52,449
I have returned.
680
00:42:52,569 --> 00:42:54,329
I am yours.
681
00:42:56,569 --> 00:42:58,329
Oh, damn.
682
00:42:58,449 --> 00:43:00,049
OK, what just happened?
683
00:43:00,209 --> 00:43:01,929
The constant goddess.
Which means?!
684
00:43:02,089 --> 00:43:04,729
Uh, we cannot survive
without an Idun.
685
00:43:04,889 --> 00:43:09,929
And when the Helen one got killed,
her spirit kind of jumped the queue.
686
00:43:11,169 --> 00:43:13,609
And whose prophecy was it
that she should be Frigg?
687
00:43:13,849 --> 00:43:18,849
Oh, that's right... the giants and
dwarves, and they know everything
about everything.
688
00:43:20,369 --> 00:43:23,129
Well done again, you Johnsons!
689
00:43:26,369 --> 00:43:27,889
Bugger.
690
00:43:32,169 --> 00:43:33,849
My Lord?
691
00:43:46,941 --> 00:44:12,680
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