1 00:00:04,366 --> 00:00:06,568 [cell door slams] 2 00:00:07,077 --> 00:00:08,695 [theme song playing] 3 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:16,074 Watch Movies, Series & LiveTV www.flixify.app 4 00:00:54,624 --> 00:00:56,534 [cell door slams] 5 00:01:10,193 --> 00:01:15,396 Subtitle sync and corrections by awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com. 6 00:01:16,973 --> 00:01:18,514 [inmate 1] You need a lot of this. 7 00:01:18,515 --> 00:01:21,267 The wrong place for that, my friend. 8 00:01:21,268 --> 00:01:22,928 [indistinct conversations] 9 00:01:23,354 --> 00:01:26,098 [sighs deeply] 10 00:01:35,366 --> 00:01:37,818 [inmate 2] Do you see my towel? 11 00:01:45,084 --> 00:01:47,828 - [inmate 3] I'm starving. - [inmate 4] Yeah, me, too. 12 00:01:50,506 --> 00:01:52,041 [inmate 5] Hey, Norma. 13 00:01:54,135 --> 00:01:55,877 Morning, Norma. 14 00:01:56,888 --> 00:01:59,465 Hey, Norma, can I get my morning blessing? 15 00:02:00,641 --> 00:02:02,843 You know, the little arm squeeze thing you do? 16 00:02:05,771 --> 00:02:08,189 Yup, hits the spot. 17 00:02:08,190 --> 00:02:09,725 [chuckles] 18 00:02:12,153 --> 00:02:13,437 [inmate] Hey. 19 00:02:15,907 --> 00:02:17,032 [urinating] 20 00:02:17,033 --> 00:02:19,367 [inmate] Yo, Norma, I know you got the magic. 21 00:02:19,368 --> 00:02:22,495 Banfield says she brushed against you in the cafeteria, 22 00:02:22,496 --> 00:02:26,291 and when you touched her wart, it fell off the next day! 23 00:02:26,292 --> 00:02:28,043 [toilet flushes] 24 00:02:28,044 --> 00:02:30,420 So, I got this letter I'm sending to my guy, Rodney, 25 00:02:30,421 --> 00:02:33,039 and I'm a need you to hocus pocus it. 26 00:02:33,757 --> 00:02:36,592 You know, I hear he got this new girlfriend, Leslie. 27 00:02:36,593 --> 00:02:39,554 Oh, and I don't need you to hex her or nothing like that, 28 00:02:39,555 --> 00:02:41,973 'cause, you know, that would be crazy. [chuckles] 29 00:02:41,974 --> 00:02:43,474 Or would it? 30 00:02:43,475 --> 00:02:47,638 I don't know. You know, It would be great, actually, if you could hex Leslie. 31 00:02:55,029 --> 00:02:56,230 That's it? 32 00:03:00,826 --> 00:03:02,278 [gasps] 33 00:03:03,204 --> 00:03:06,532 Oh, I felt that. Seriously! 34 00:03:07,416 --> 00:03:10,376 Goosies on my arms! Look at my arm hair! [gasps] 35 00:03:10,377 --> 00:03:13,504 Oh, that is some spooky shit! Oh, thank you. 36 00:03:13,505 --> 00:03:17,376 Thank you so much! Spooky shit. 37 00:03:20,554 --> 00:03:23,882 Are you a good witch or a bad witch? 38 00:03:28,312 --> 00:03:30,063 [man on video] Two types of sexual harassment 39 00:03:30,064 --> 00:03:31,814 are generally recognized. 40 00:03:31,815 --> 00:03:35,235 Quid Pro Quo and Hostile Work Environment. 41 00:03:35,236 --> 00:03:37,988 Quid Pro Quo means, "Something for something." 42 00:03:37,989 --> 00:03:41,074 For instance, a manager promises to give you a promotion 43 00:03:41,075 --> 00:03:43,118 in exchange for some sexual favor. 44 00:03:43,119 --> 00:03:44,619 - [laughing] - Hostile Work Environment. 45 00:03:44,620 --> 00:03:45,954 - This type... - Question? 46 00:03:45,955 --> 00:03:47,705 - Hostile environment? - [Tim] Yes. 47 00:03:47,706 --> 00:03:48,789 It's a prison. 48 00:03:48,790 --> 00:03:52,877 Uh, we are referring to a co-worker's unwanted flirting, 49 00:03:52,878 --> 00:03:54,963 sexually suggestive looks, 50 00:03:54,964 --> 00:03:59,134 language, shoulder massages, back scratching. 51 00:03:59,135 --> 00:04:04,347 Uh, any behavior that a reasonable person would deem inappropriate. 52 00:04:04,348 --> 00:04:07,392 Using, um, offensive or degrading names, 53 00:04:07,393 --> 00:04:10,728 such as "honey, sweetie, baby..." 54 00:04:10,729 --> 00:04:12,105 - Daddy-mack. - [Bayley chuckling] 55 00:04:12,106 --> 00:04:14,183 - [Ford] Cuddly-wuddly. - [Kowalski] Sugar tits. 56 00:04:14,858 --> 00:04:16,776 Come on! How old are you? 57 00:04:16,777 --> 00:04:19,570 - Sorry, sir. - No, really, how old are you? 58 00:04:19,571 --> 00:04:22,490 - Uh, 21, sir. - Wow. 59 00:04:22,491 --> 00:04:25,201 Yeah, my birthday was actually last Tuesday. 60 00:04:25,202 --> 00:04:28,163 - I had my first Amaretto sour. - Good for you. 61 00:04:28,164 --> 00:04:30,123 Now, lose the junior high school shenanigans 62 00:04:30,124 --> 00:04:31,541 and act like a fucking person. 63 00:04:31,542 --> 00:04:32,667 Yes, sir. 64 00:04:32,668 --> 00:04:35,586 And the rest of you, set an example for the new COs 65 00:04:35,587 --> 00:04:38,790 and show some respect to George over here. 66 00:04:39,466 --> 00:04:42,552 - [man on video] Sexual harassment... - That's actually Tim from HR. 67 00:04:42,553 --> 00:04:44,304 But the majority of sexual harassment... 68 00:04:44,305 --> 00:04:46,639 - Who's George? - George is PR. 69 00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:50,310 - Is PR the same as marketing? - No, no, Debra's marketing. 70 00:04:50,311 --> 00:04:54,730 Welcome to the corporate maze. [chuckles] Sorry for the rigmarole. 71 00:04:54,731 --> 00:04:58,026 It'd be nice if it also covered inmate relations, 72 00:04:58,027 --> 00:04:59,860 being this is a female prison. 73 00:04:59,861 --> 00:05:00,986 Completely agree. 74 00:05:00,987 --> 00:05:05,366 But, uh, hey, anything to get folks thinking about appropriate behavior. 75 00:05:05,367 --> 00:05:07,743 We've had some incidents in the past. 76 00:05:07,744 --> 00:05:11,164 Oh, you wouldn't believe some of the cases we've had. Just... 77 00:05:11,165 --> 00:05:15,418 Employees sexting and porn on their work computers, 78 00:05:15,419 --> 00:05:18,338 masturbating in the office. Just disgusting. 79 00:05:18,339 --> 00:05:20,957 - Disgusting. - Yeah, disgusting. 80 00:05:23,219 --> 00:05:26,387 [Flaca] Don't you think the people buying these panties 81 00:05:26,388 --> 00:05:28,639 will feel weird if they knew a bunch of felons made them? 82 00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:30,725 [Black Cindy] Mmm-mmm. They'd probably think that shit was hot. 83 00:05:30,726 --> 00:05:33,686 Yeah, they should put that shit on the tag, "Made in Federal." 84 00:05:33,687 --> 00:05:34,979 [all laughing] 85 00:05:34,980 --> 00:05:37,148 Dudes would be into polyester grannies 86 00:05:37,149 --> 00:05:40,610 if they knew they came from a bunch of bisnotches behind bars. 87 00:05:40,611 --> 00:05:43,654 You know, when I was in Chicago, this guy asked me for my dirty underwear. 88 00:05:43,655 --> 00:05:45,573 - To wear? - To sniff. 89 00:05:45,574 --> 00:05:47,992 Oh. Yeah, that's a thing. Panty sniffers. 90 00:05:47,993 --> 00:05:49,577 [Stella] In Tokyo, they have vending machines. 91 00:05:49,578 --> 00:05:53,206 You can buy dirty schoolgirl panties for, like, I don't know, 10,000 yen. 92 00:05:53,207 --> 00:05:55,625 - What that is in real money? - It's like 80 bucks. 93 00:05:55,626 --> 00:05:56,993 Huh! 94 00:05:57,753 --> 00:06:00,463 One of my old boyfriends was obsessed with noses. 95 00:06:00,464 --> 00:06:02,465 Always trying to suck on mine. 96 00:06:02,466 --> 00:06:05,218 It left a very confusing hickey. 97 00:06:05,219 --> 00:06:06,594 I can't believe that's a thing. 98 00:06:06,595 --> 00:06:08,471 Man, everything is a thing! 99 00:06:08,472 --> 00:06:10,973 Like them people who like to fuck in animal costumes. 100 00:06:10,974 --> 00:06:12,057 [chuckles] Furries. 101 00:06:12,058 --> 00:06:14,227 Or those guys who are really into My Little Pony. 102 00:06:14,228 --> 00:06:17,013 - Bronies. - Look at you, Google. 103 00:06:17,606 --> 00:06:19,524 What are you, some kind of fetish fangirl? 104 00:06:19,525 --> 00:06:21,984 [Black Cindy chuckling] See, that's the thing with the Internet. 105 00:06:21,985 --> 00:06:23,819 Nobody's a freak no more. 106 00:06:23,820 --> 00:06:28,115 See, it used to be all these weirdoes sitting alone in their houses, 107 00:06:28,116 --> 00:06:30,993 jerking it to bugs or falling in love with their toasters, 108 00:06:30,994 --> 00:06:32,787 feeling all creepy and sad. 109 00:06:32,788 --> 00:06:35,498 Now, all they got to do is log on 110 00:06:35,499 --> 00:06:37,875 and find the same-minded toaster-loving peeps 111 00:06:37,876 --> 00:06:41,754 and, like, bam, suddenly shit be perfectly normal! 112 00:06:41,755 --> 00:06:46,176 Shawty, you could be into cannibalism or like being tickled. It don't matter. 113 00:06:46,177 --> 00:06:49,011 Somebody out there gonna like what you like. 114 00:06:49,012 --> 00:06:50,430 [sewing machine whirring] 115 00:06:50,431 --> 00:06:53,098 Damn! I sewed the leg shut again. 116 00:06:53,099 --> 00:06:54,593 - Shit! - [inmates laughing] 117 00:06:55,311 --> 00:06:56,561 How do you even do that? 118 00:06:56,562 --> 00:06:58,271 Man, whatever. [clicks tongue] 119 00:06:58,272 --> 00:07:01,316 - This 'bout to be a headband. Yeah. - [inmates laughing] 120 00:07:01,317 --> 00:07:03,018 Check it, check it. 121 00:07:03,860 --> 00:07:07,322 Inmate! That's official Whispers merchandise. 122 00:07:07,323 --> 00:07:08,489 If you make any more mistakes, 123 00:07:08,490 --> 00:07:10,533 we're gonna take the full retail price out of your pay. 124 00:07:10,534 --> 00:07:14,119 Ooh, what is that? Like 100 hours of work for 25 cents of fabric? 125 00:07:14,120 --> 00:07:15,913 Zip it, Hayes, or that's a shot. 126 00:07:15,914 --> 00:07:17,332 This is not coffee hour, 127 00:07:17,333 --> 00:07:20,702 and there are plenty of bodies in here who'd be happy to fill those seats! 128 00:07:35,141 --> 00:07:37,059 What am I supposed to do with you? 129 00:07:37,060 --> 00:07:38,728 You're the boss. You tell me. 130 00:07:38,729 --> 00:07:40,521 I don't know how you talked your way back in here. 131 00:07:40,522 --> 00:07:43,566 You're like a Somali pirate trying to get their ladder hooked. 132 00:07:43,567 --> 00:07:47,445 But I got the whole fucking Coast Guard watching you. 133 00:07:47,446 --> 00:07:50,281 You see these girls? They're mine! 134 00:07:50,282 --> 00:07:51,532 Don't you try nothing. 135 00:07:51,533 --> 00:07:53,284 The evil eye goes both ways. 136 00:07:53,285 --> 00:07:55,286 I'm only happy to be back. 137 00:07:55,287 --> 00:07:57,580 You gonna be happy sweeping the floor, washing dishes? 138 00:07:57,581 --> 00:07:59,624 Because there's no way I'm gonna let you handle a knife. 139 00:07:59,625 --> 00:08:01,284 Probably wise. 140 00:08:01,960 --> 00:08:04,871 - Go help Norma. - That peeler is pretty sharp, too. 141 00:08:06,840 --> 00:08:10,843 And no funny business, got it? I am watching my back, Red. 142 00:08:10,844 --> 00:08:12,588 Yes, boss. 143 00:08:18,602 --> 00:08:20,144 All right, everybody, come on, 144 00:08:20,145 --> 00:08:21,896 I gotta get this shit prepped before 10:00! 145 00:08:21,897 --> 00:08:24,064 10:00? First lunch block isn't till 11:00. 146 00:08:24,065 --> 00:08:25,149 Well, Benny's coming. 147 00:08:25,150 --> 00:08:27,109 I'm not gonna make my kid drive up here for two hours 148 00:08:27,110 --> 00:08:28,444 to sit with him for five minutes. 149 00:08:28,445 --> 00:08:29,820 He should come a different time. 150 00:08:29,821 --> 00:08:31,239 Hitchhikers can't be choosers. 151 00:08:31,240 --> 00:08:33,817 Sophia's wife can't drive him later, and she's my ride. 152 00:08:40,957 --> 00:08:44,585 You know if you boil them first, you could slide the skin off with your hands. 153 00:08:44,586 --> 00:08:45,787 I taught you that. 154 00:08:47,714 --> 00:08:49,583 Amateurs. 155 00:08:52,928 --> 00:08:55,680 Twelve years we've been in this kitchen together. 156 00:08:55,681 --> 00:08:57,090 We're a good team, hmm? 157 00:09:00,894 --> 00:09:02,853 Thank you, Norma. 158 00:09:02,854 --> 00:09:05,056 [man speaking indistinctly on PA] 159 00:09:24,585 --> 00:09:27,203 [sitar music playing] 160 00:09:31,592 --> 00:09:33,468 [Guru Mack] Well, I want everything to be better. 161 00:09:33,469 --> 00:09:34,677 I want everything to be happier. 162 00:09:34,678 --> 00:09:36,721 And I keep doing the same thing over and over again, 163 00:09:36,722 --> 00:09:38,556 which, to me, is the definition of insanity. 164 00:09:38,557 --> 00:09:40,216 - [all laughing] - Right? 165 00:09:41,393 --> 00:09:44,220 Welcome, sister. Have a seat. 166 00:09:44,813 --> 00:09:46,389 Join us. 167 00:09:48,775 --> 00:09:50,192 As I was saying, 168 00:09:50,193 --> 00:09:53,153 you're all here because you're interested in transformation. 169 00:09:53,154 --> 00:09:56,866 And you're asking yourself, "Do I feel happy?" 170 00:09:56,867 --> 00:09:58,033 [woman] Right on. 171 00:09:58,034 --> 00:09:59,660 [Guru Mack] "Do I feel good enough? 172 00:09:59,661 --> 00:10:01,371 Do I feel out of control?" 173 00:10:01,372 --> 00:10:03,080 [all murmuring assent] 174 00:10:03,081 --> 00:10:04,457 [Guru Mack] Lonely? 175 00:10:04,458 --> 00:10:08,503 Afraid? Why do I hate myself? 176 00:10:08,504 --> 00:10:09,670 [man] Choice words. 177 00:10:09,671 --> 00:10:13,132 [Guru Mack] Well, this self that you speak of... 178 00:10:13,133 --> 00:10:14,800 it's not a fixed object. 179 00:10:14,801 --> 00:10:18,012 - It's a story that we're telling, right? - Right on. 180 00:10:18,013 --> 00:10:21,932 And if you wanna change the self, you gotta change the story. 181 00:10:21,933 --> 00:10:24,685 [laughs] Because the desire to transform, 182 00:10:24,686 --> 00:10:28,648 the thing that brought you here today, means you've already begun to change. 183 00:10:28,649 --> 00:10:30,149 - Right? - Yeah. 184 00:10:30,150 --> 00:10:33,986 I'm not here to save you, children. I'm just a bearded guy in white pants. 185 00:10:33,987 --> 00:10:35,821 [all laughing] 186 00:10:35,822 --> 00:10:39,950 They call me Guru Mack because I'm a teacher. 187 00:10:39,951 --> 00:10:43,529 And I can teach you how to change your story. 188 00:10:45,541 --> 00:10:49,035 Sister Sad Eyes, what brings you to us today? 189 00:10:50,336 --> 00:10:53,665 Don't be shy, you're among friends. Everybody here is a searcher. 190 00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:58,670 What is the story that you are telling? 191 00:11:00,889 --> 00:11:02,215 Mmm... 192 00:11:03,434 --> 00:11:05,267 [stuttering] 193 00:11:05,268 --> 00:11:06,845 My... 194 00:11:07,729 --> 00:11:09,855 [stuttering] 195 00:11:09,856 --> 00:11:12,308 Okay, okay, okay, I got it. 196 00:11:15,446 --> 00:11:16,821 [sighs] 197 00:11:16,822 --> 00:11:18,439 I feel your spirit. 198 00:11:19,407 --> 00:11:22,402 - [sighs] - You don't ever have to speak with me. 199 00:11:25,413 --> 00:11:26,990 I hear you. 200 00:11:30,586 --> 00:11:31,836 [sighing] 201 00:11:31,837 --> 00:11:33,079 [breathes deeply] 202 00:11:34,214 --> 00:11:35,707 Stay with us. 203 00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:38,794 I'm glad you're here. 204 00:11:50,647 --> 00:11:51,981 I can't let you perform this in class. 205 00:11:51,982 --> 00:11:55,192 Oh, it's not a solo piece. I'm gonna cast the other parts. 206 00:11:55,193 --> 00:11:57,027 Of course, I play Edwina. 207 00:11:57,028 --> 00:12:01,031 I know she has freckles and a more... ample bosom than I, 208 00:12:01,032 --> 00:12:04,284 but I think we can use our imaginations. 209 00:12:04,285 --> 00:12:06,328 How do I put this constructively? 210 00:12:06,329 --> 00:12:10,500 Um, this piece of writing is... obscene. It's pornographic. 211 00:12:10,501 --> 00:12:13,954 No, it's erotically inclined. 212 00:12:15,046 --> 00:12:17,373 "His purple love muscle? 213 00:12:18,049 --> 00:12:21,051 Her three holes opened, ready to be explored by his..." 214 00:12:21,052 --> 00:12:22,386 [both reciting] "Swollen pangolin." 215 00:12:22,387 --> 00:12:23,846 I don't even know what a pangolin is. 216 00:12:23,847 --> 00:12:27,300 It's a mammal with scales. And in this context, it's... 217 00:12:28,769 --> 00:12:32,388 Okay, yeah, I got it. This was not the assignment. 218 00:12:33,314 --> 00:12:34,940 You asked us to use our imagination. 219 00:12:34,941 --> 00:12:38,569 I asked you to re-imagine a primary life experience, 220 00:12:38,570 --> 00:12:41,155 not write a kinky sex fantasy set in space. 221 00:12:41,156 --> 00:12:45,284 It's not just sex, it's love. 222 00:12:45,285 --> 00:12:48,453 It's two people connecting... 223 00:12:48,454 --> 00:12:51,541 with four other people, and aliens. 224 00:12:51,542 --> 00:12:53,584 - Suzanne, no. - But it's just... 225 00:12:53,585 --> 00:12:56,329 It's inappropriate and I can't support it. 226 00:12:57,088 --> 00:12:59,040 That's final. 227 00:13:03,344 --> 00:13:05,179 Whoa, whoa, what's going on? 228 00:13:05,180 --> 00:13:08,098 Stupid! I'm stupid. 229 00:13:08,099 --> 00:13:11,268 She said it's dirty and it's wrong, and she hated it! 230 00:13:11,269 --> 00:13:13,353 - Hated what? - [exclaims] 231 00:13:13,354 --> 00:13:16,440 Your story? And you've been working so hard, too. 232 00:13:16,441 --> 00:13:18,226 Yeah. 233 00:13:19,444 --> 00:13:23,106 Come on, now. 'Cause one person doesn't like it? 234 00:13:26,159 --> 00:13:29,912 You know, Stephen King got rejected a bazillion times 235 00:13:29,913 --> 00:13:31,789 before anybody looked at his shit! 236 00:13:31,790 --> 00:13:33,498 Fucking J.K. Rowling! 237 00:13:33,499 --> 00:13:36,376 Some punk-ass publisher read Harry fucking Potter 238 00:13:36,377 --> 00:13:38,496 and was like... "Nope." 239 00:13:39,214 --> 00:13:42,592 Now, I haven't read this yet, 240 00:13:42,593 --> 00:13:48,013 but knowing that wacky brain of yours, I'm sure it's got to be mad interesting. 241 00:13:48,014 --> 00:13:50,341 She said it was vulgar. 242 00:13:53,019 --> 00:13:57,189 Okay, you really did, um... go there. 243 00:13:57,190 --> 00:14:01,861 Look, Berdie is just trying to protect her stupid-ass class. 244 00:14:01,862 --> 00:14:04,029 Chang got to do her scene, 245 00:14:04,030 --> 00:14:07,491 and it's all heads chopping off and organs coming out. 246 00:14:07,492 --> 00:14:09,660 That's because this is America. 247 00:14:09,661 --> 00:14:13,914 Violence is all good and fine, but sex? [gasps] Lord, no! 248 00:14:13,915 --> 00:14:15,457 Okay? 249 00:14:15,458 --> 00:14:20,121 Don't let her stop you, Suzanne. You got to keep writing. 250 00:14:21,715 --> 00:14:24,258 - So, there's these different categories. - Mmm-hmm. 251 00:14:24,259 --> 00:14:27,302 Who you're gonna marry, what car you're gonna drive, 252 00:14:27,303 --> 00:14:29,138 and how many kids you're gonna have. 253 00:14:29,139 --> 00:14:31,849 Are you telling me you've never played MASH before? 254 00:14:31,850 --> 00:14:33,100 Not since I was 12. 255 00:14:33,101 --> 00:14:36,596 I remember that. MASH. Tells your future, right? 256 00:14:37,563 --> 00:14:39,690 Mansion, Apartment... 257 00:14:39,691 --> 00:14:42,484 - Shack, House. Yes! [laughs] - Yeah. 258 00:14:42,485 --> 00:14:44,361 You draw your spiral... 259 00:14:44,362 --> 00:14:46,071 - Mmm-hmm. - ...and then you count your lines, 260 00:14:46,072 --> 00:14:47,907 and you get your magic number. 261 00:14:47,908 --> 00:14:50,034 And there it is, your whole life! 262 00:14:50,035 --> 00:14:52,202 Ah. [chuckling] Yeah. 263 00:14:52,203 --> 00:14:54,197 I always ended up living in the shack. 264 00:14:56,917 --> 00:14:59,669 Chapman probably lived in a mansion. 265 00:14:59,670 --> 00:15:02,337 - In the game or in real life? - In real life. 266 00:15:02,338 --> 00:15:04,464 Oh, no. It was hardly a mansion. 267 00:15:04,465 --> 00:15:06,167 How many bathrooms? 268 00:15:07,052 --> 00:15:13,424 Um, four? Or five. There was a half-bath off the playroom. 269 00:15:14,517 --> 00:15:16,219 The playroom? 270 00:15:17,938 --> 00:15:20,556 It was a good-sized house. 271 00:15:21,524 --> 00:15:22,808 Mansion. 272 00:15:23,484 --> 00:15:25,854 - Did you have a maid? - No! 273 00:15:27,072 --> 00:15:28,439 Housekeeper. 274 00:15:30,158 --> 00:15:32,451 - [chuckling] - I was very lonely as a child. 275 00:15:32,452 --> 00:15:33,819 [sucks teeth] 276 00:15:38,583 --> 00:15:43,121 Do you hear yourself sometimes? Like, when you speak? 277 00:15:44,673 --> 00:15:46,048 [Black Cindy] Mmm! 278 00:15:46,049 --> 00:15:49,927 Fuck, yeah! Hey, y'all, tell me these kosher meals ain't delicious! 279 00:15:49,928 --> 00:15:54,098 - This broccoli still got crunch. - Yo, y'all gotta keep your voices down. 280 00:15:54,099 --> 00:15:57,059 Y'all get the noodles? Yo, mine had noodles! 281 00:15:57,060 --> 00:15:59,478 Mmm-mmm-mmm! 282 00:15:59,479 --> 00:16:02,982 - Would y'all shut the hell up? - Yo, why you shushing me? 283 00:16:02,983 --> 00:16:05,943 You keep running your mouth, everyone's gonna start asking! 284 00:16:05,944 --> 00:16:07,069 So? 285 00:16:07,070 --> 00:16:09,571 Then they're gonna find out none of us are actually Jewish, 286 00:16:09,572 --> 00:16:11,073 and none of us gonna get 'em! 287 00:16:11,074 --> 00:16:13,075 - How do they know I ain't Jewish? - Shh. 288 00:16:13,076 --> 00:16:15,911 Man, how come Jews only get to eat this deliciousness? 289 00:16:15,912 --> 00:16:17,079 Shh! 290 00:16:17,080 --> 00:16:18,364 Now stop shushing me! 291 00:16:19,415 --> 00:16:23,043 That's a eye shush. And a eye shush just as bad as a regular shush! 292 00:16:23,044 --> 00:16:27,214 One, two, three, four, five. Yes! 293 00:16:27,215 --> 00:16:28,382 So, you're gonna marry Gustav. 294 00:16:28,383 --> 00:16:31,135 And you're gonna be living in an apartment in Maui. 295 00:16:31,136 --> 00:16:32,302 [squealing] 296 00:16:32,303 --> 00:16:36,056 With 13 kids! 297 00:16:36,057 --> 00:16:38,517 And you're gonna be driving... you know, a Toyota Corolla. 298 00:16:38,518 --> 00:16:39,719 Great. 299 00:16:40,186 --> 00:16:43,022 Gustav. Is that the Romanian? 300 00:16:43,023 --> 00:16:45,315 - Yes, he's... He's very nice. - Mmm-hmm. 301 00:16:45,316 --> 00:16:49,653 He's not the world's greatest speller, but English is not his first language. 302 00:16:49,654 --> 00:16:52,531 Thirteen kids in an apartment, that is gonna be tight. 303 00:16:52,532 --> 00:16:57,112 Well, you're gonna be living in Maui, spending most of your time outside. 304 00:16:57,829 --> 00:17:01,415 I thought I was gonna marry Ralph, but he's so into firearms. 305 00:17:01,416 --> 00:17:04,334 I guess that could be dangerous with all the little ones around. 306 00:17:04,335 --> 00:17:05,544 - [Piper] Right? - [Big Boo] Mmm. 307 00:17:05,545 --> 00:17:06,837 Ralph's the fatty? 308 00:17:06,838 --> 00:17:11,216 No, no. The fatty is into Japanese cartoons. 309 00:17:11,217 --> 00:17:13,510 He has these dreamy eyes. 310 00:17:13,511 --> 00:17:15,630 You find the good in everyone. 311 00:17:16,222 --> 00:17:18,766 - It's a lovely quality. - Lovely? 312 00:17:18,767 --> 00:17:21,101 She's scamming creeps for commissary money. 313 00:17:21,102 --> 00:17:23,395 I mean, that is what you're doing, isn't it? 314 00:17:23,396 --> 00:17:28,525 They are lonely. They just need somebody to listen to them. 315 00:17:28,526 --> 00:17:30,610 And it's not like I got something better to do. 316 00:17:30,611 --> 00:17:32,237 [Piper] I think that women's prison 317 00:17:32,238 --> 00:17:35,324 feeds into the whole '70s exploitation fantasy for men. 318 00:17:35,325 --> 00:17:38,410 It's like we're all in Chained Heat or Cellblock Sisters 319 00:17:38,411 --> 00:17:41,163 and all we do is have lesbian sex and strip searches 320 00:17:41,164 --> 00:17:43,824 and naked cat fights in the shower. 321 00:17:49,047 --> 00:17:50,505 We also do other things. 322 00:17:50,506 --> 00:17:52,341 [chuckles] 323 00:17:52,342 --> 00:17:53,884 Who cares if it's a fantasy? 324 00:17:53,885 --> 00:17:57,346 They get what they want, I get to make a buck. 325 00:17:57,347 --> 00:17:59,382 Everybody wins! 326 00:18:15,115 --> 00:18:16,698 What are those? 327 00:18:16,699 --> 00:18:20,660 They were gonna be a gift for you, but I have an idea. 328 00:18:20,661 --> 00:18:23,998 Bear with me because it's, uh... it sounds kind of crazy. 329 00:18:23,999 --> 00:18:25,707 Shoot. 330 00:18:25,708 --> 00:18:28,418 You may think that I stole these from Whispers, 331 00:18:28,419 --> 00:18:32,797 but... technically... I didn't, 332 00:18:32,798 --> 00:18:35,217 because I made them from material they were just gonna throw away. 333 00:18:35,218 --> 00:18:40,256 So, I re-purposed trash and there's... there's no official crime happening here. 334 00:18:40,765 --> 00:18:42,592 You are such a good girl. 335 00:18:44,936 --> 00:18:48,063 These are the second pair I've made with no one noticing. 336 00:18:48,064 --> 00:18:52,651 If I could get some people helping me, I could have a pretty healthy supply. 337 00:18:52,652 --> 00:18:54,278 And rumor has it, 338 00:18:54,279 --> 00:18:57,406 there are guys out there that like sniffing dirty underwear. 339 00:18:57,407 --> 00:18:59,491 And I think that they would be extra interested 340 00:18:59,492 --> 00:19:02,619 if they came from lady felons. 341 00:19:02,620 --> 00:19:07,666 We are sitting on... a gold mine! 342 00:19:07,667 --> 00:19:10,585 We have captive women and we have underwear! 343 00:19:10,586 --> 00:19:14,798 All we need to do is recruit a bunch of girls with super stinky tutus 344 00:19:14,799 --> 00:19:16,466 and then figure out a way to get the used goods 345 00:19:16,467 --> 00:19:19,379 out there to the... freaks who want 'em. 346 00:19:22,057 --> 00:19:26,177 No! It sounds nuts, doesn't it? 347 00:19:27,312 --> 00:19:30,556 - It made sense in my head. - Are you kidding? 348 00:19:31,066 --> 00:19:32,267 What? 349 00:19:33,193 --> 00:19:34,859 This is fucking brilliant. 350 00:19:34,860 --> 00:19:36,312 [laughing] 351 00:19:38,323 --> 00:19:41,116 This is your duty belt. It contains a walkie... 352 00:19:41,117 --> 00:19:43,243 - [Bayley] He said "duty." - ...cuffs, expandable baton, 353 00:19:43,244 --> 00:19:46,163 sterile gloves, and pepper spray. 354 00:19:46,164 --> 00:19:47,331 Nice! 355 00:19:47,332 --> 00:19:50,334 These are not toys. They are a last resort. 356 00:19:50,335 --> 00:19:54,171 If an inmate is not responding to a reasonable command 357 00:19:54,172 --> 00:19:55,464 and needs to be subdued, 358 00:19:55,465 --> 00:19:59,084 I will demonstrate the proper subjugation technique. 359 00:20:00,136 --> 00:20:02,304 CO Rikerson, if you please. 360 00:20:02,305 --> 00:20:07,892 The goal is to use your opponent's own weight and inertia against her. 361 00:20:07,893 --> 00:20:12,106 Now, let us imagine this is a diminutive lady inmate 362 00:20:12,107 --> 00:20:15,275 and not Dont'a Hightower over here. 363 00:20:15,276 --> 00:20:18,028 [Caputo laughing] You don't want to hurt me, buddy, huh? 364 00:20:18,029 --> 00:20:21,406 I will use a combination joint-locking technique 365 00:20:21,407 --> 00:20:23,818 to take my opponent to the ground. 366 00:20:25,870 --> 00:20:27,579 The inmate is angry. 367 00:20:27,580 --> 00:20:30,700 Maybe she goes to grab me, or push me. Please. 368 00:20:32,377 --> 00:20:35,670 Trap her hand against my chest with my right hand. 369 00:20:35,671 --> 00:20:37,589 - Turn the wrist... - [Rikerson groaning] 370 00:20:37,590 --> 00:20:41,426 ...apply an arm bar with my left hand just above the elbow. 371 00:20:41,427 --> 00:20:43,220 And as I pivot, 372 00:20:43,221 --> 00:20:46,507 - easily taking my attacker to the ground. - [Rikerson] Ow, ow, ow. 373 00:20:47,892 --> 00:20:49,393 [Rikerson groaning] 374 00:20:49,394 --> 00:20:52,187 God, that hurt. That really hurt! 375 00:20:52,188 --> 00:20:53,855 - Sorry. - Shit, man! 376 00:20:53,856 --> 00:20:56,400 I need my inhaler. Where's my inhaler? 377 00:20:56,401 --> 00:20:58,068 [Caputo] Okay, as you can see, 378 00:20:58,069 --> 00:21:01,738 I have, uh, effectively neutralized the prisoner. 379 00:21:01,739 --> 00:21:05,200 Great, great. Well done, Jackie Chan. Thank you for that. 380 00:21:05,201 --> 00:21:09,788 You guys should read through those manuals and keep practicing this karate business. 381 00:21:09,789 --> 00:21:12,166 It seems very effective. 382 00:21:12,167 --> 00:21:13,250 We're not done. 383 00:21:13,251 --> 00:21:15,335 Can I speak with you for a minute? 384 00:21:15,336 --> 00:21:19,006 Okay. Practice with your partners. 385 00:21:19,007 --> 00:21:22,009 CO Donaldson, take over. 386 00:21:22,010 --> 00:21:23,802 All right, COs, line up with your inmates. 387 00:21:23,803 --> 00:21:25,012 - Let's get started. - [officer] Okay. 388 00:21:25,013 --> 00:21:26,596 Half speed, no takedowns. 389 00:21:26,597 --> 00:21:29,183 But when you feel comfortable, take it to the ground. 390 00:21:29,184 --> 00:21:33,895 All right... "Sicko-witch." Give me your best shot. 391 00:21:33,896 --> 00:21:37,933 - It's Sikowitz. Like "psycho." - Well, we'll see about that. 392 00:21:38,318 --> 00:21:39,484 [Sikowitz yelps] 393 00:21:39,485 --> 00:21:43,530 - I'm not afraid of you, Donuts. - Stop calling me that. 394 00:21:43,531 --> 00:21:45,282 I know you bribed your way in here. What'd it take? 395 00:21:45,283 --> 00:21:47,083 Half a dozen jellies and a cruller, huh? 396 00:21:49,079 --> 00:21:51,955 Hey, Joe, we're not paying these guys do PE. 397 00:21:51,956 --> 00:21:53,748 They need 40 hours of training. 398 00:21:53,749 --> 00:21:56,460 We need to be able to assess their physical efficiency, 399 00:21:56,461 --> 00:21:58,212 teach them how to convey an order. 400 00:21:58,213 --> 00:22:01,423 That sounds like... on-the-job stuff to me. 401 00:22:01,424 --> 00:22:04,801 I can't send a bunch of untrained COs out there. 402 00:22:04,802 --> 00:22:06,053 You're not. 403 00:22:06,054 --> 00:22:08,680 You're partnering them with experienced guards 404 00:22:08,681 --> 00:22:10,591 and calling it an apprenticeship. 405 00:22:11,559 --> 00:22:13,602 There is an art to this. 406 00:22:13,603 --> 00:22:16,020 Proper levels of assertion, 407 00:22:16,021 --> 00:22:20,609 how to communicate verbally and non-verbally. 408 00:22:20,610 --> 00:22:23,103 That's why we have the manual. 409 00:22:23,904 --> 00:22:25,898 They are not gonna read that. 410 00:22:27,325 --> 00:22:28,617 Yes, really. 411 00:22:28,618 --> 00:22:32,621 See what I did there? Communicated with you non-verbally. 412 00:22:32,622 --> 00:22:36,075 No training here. Let's get 'em working. 413 00:22:38,378 --> 00:22:40,287 Motherfucker! 414 00:22:43,174 --> 00:22:46,551 Ay, tonta, your mother never taught you how to reheat dinner rolls? 415 00:22:46,552 --> 00:22:50,722 My mother taught me to pluck my eyebrows and to duct-tape my tits together. 416 00:22:50,723 --> 00:22:53,433 [chuckling] Mira, I told you that you needed to 417 00:22:53,434 --> 00:22:55,560 - clean these steamers between every meal. - [Aleida sighs] 418 00:22:55,561 --> 00:22:57,771 - That's some nasty shit. - You know what's nasty? 419 00:22:57,772 --> 00:22:59,439 The cabbage that's been in there for two days. 420 00:22:59,440 --> 00:23:02,192 You are a pain in my ass, the both of you. 421 00:23:02,193 --> 00:23:05,069 - If you fill them with warm, soapy... - No, no, no chiming in. 422 00:23:05,070 --> 00:23:07,197 What, you think I don't know how to run my kitchen? 423 00:23:07,198 --> 00:23:10,367 All right, Maria, you're in charge while I take my visitation. 424 00:23:10,368 --> 00:23:11,701 You gonna leave me here with these clowns? 425 00:23:11,702 --> 00:23:14,279 Try not to fuck it all up, huh? 426 00:23:18,584 --> 00:23:19,668 [Red] Aw. 427 00:23:19,669 --> 00:23:22,212 It's good to see you back in here, Gina. 428 00:23:22,213 --> 00:23:24,256 Hey, Red, we've come to see Norma, actually. 429 00:23:24,257 --> 00:23:27,676 A bunch of us were wondering if you would meet with us in a group. 430 00:23:27,677 --> 00:23:29,803 [Gina] My Wiccan circle is getting weird. 431 00:23:29,804 --> 00:23:32,597 Protchnick keeps rubbing the energy ball on her cooter, 432 00:23:32,598 --> 00:23:35,058 and who wants to touch it after that? You know, so... 433 00:23:35,059 --> 00:23:38,478 I think we would all benefit from some energetic time with you. 434 00:23:38,479 --> 00:23:40,146 What are you babbling about? 435 00:23:40,147 --> 00:23:43,358 Norma's a healer. She has powers. 436 00:23:43,359 --> 00:23:44,609 You believe this? 437 00:23:44,610 --> 00:23:47,904 She's performing miracles, Red. Everyone's talking about it. 438 00:23:47,905 --> 00:23:51,325 We booked some time in the chapel, and we were hoping to meet tomorrow. 439 00:23:51,326 --> 00:23:54,453 Chapel? What is she, your priest? 440 00:23:54,454 --> 00:23:58,207 The poor woman doesn't speak, so she can't tell you to fuck off, but I can. 441 00:23:58,208 --> 00:24:01,084 She doesn't want to listen to all your snively little problems. 442 00:24:01,085 --> 00:24:02,294 Do you, Norma? 443 00:24:02,295 --> 00:24:05,214 Be careful. She can hex you! 444 00:24:05,215 --> 00:24:08,883 [laughs] You think she's some kind of magical mute? 445 00:24:08,884 --> 00:24:11,094 There's no way she's comfortable with this. 446 00:24:11,095 --> 00:24:14,138 Are you, Norma? Go, get out of here. 447 00:24:14,139 --> 00:24:15,307 Gina, you know better. 448 00:24:15,308 --> 00:24:18,052 - Stop listening to this basket case. Shoo! - We're gonna talk. 449 00:24:19,061 --> 00:24:22,731 [sighs] Are they hounding you all the time? 450 00:24:22,732 --> 00:24:25,650 These women are desperate for anything to believe in. 451 00:24:25,651 --> 00:24:29,363 Looking to you to guide them when you can't even guide yourself. 452 00:24:29,364 --> 00:24:32,657 Norma, put the drink in first and then the sandwich. 453 00:24:32,658 --> 00:24:34,318 You're squishing all of them! 454 00:24:35,077 --> 00:24:38,489 There you go. Better. 455 00:24:40,916 --> 00:24:42,993 [woman playing flute] 456 00:24:47,882 --> 00:24:50,375 [all chanting in Sanskrit] 457 00:24:57,433 --> 00:25:00,018 [all] Guru Mack is our teacher. 458 00:25:00,019 --> 00:25:02,479 Our teacher is our father. 459 00:25:02,480 --> 00:25:04,356 Our father is our God. 460 00:25:04,357 --> 00:25:06,441 Our God is our light, 461 00:25:06,442 --> 00:25:10,445 the sky, the sun, the heart. 462 00:25:10,446 --> 00:25:14,283 My children, today we open our hearts 463 00:25:14,284 --> 00:25:17,236 to this woman, Norma Moon... 464 00:25:17,995 --> 00:25:23,493 as I join her in marriage, with body, with speech and with mind. 465 00:25:24,794 --> 00:25:28,380 Norma Moon, on this blessed day, 466 00:25:28,381 --> 00:25:33,919 I take you as my wife, my partner, and my light. 467 00:25:34,970 --> 00:25:40,510 I join my heart to your heart, and my soul to your soul, 468 00:25:41,101 --> 00:25:43,478 and my flesh to your flesh. 469 00:25:43,479 --> 00:25:46,981 And I vow to honor you in this life 470 00:25:46,982 --> 00:25:49,901 and on many astral planes to come. 471 00:25:49,902 --> 00:25:51,228 I am yours. 472 00:26:10,214 --> 00:26:14,593 Kirsa Rain, on this blessed day, I take you as my wife, 473 00:26:14,594 --> 00:26:17,630 my partner and my light. 474 00:26:18,431 --> 00:26:24,136 And I join my heart to your heart, my soul to your soul... 475 00:26:25,270 --> 00:26:27,514 and my flesh to your flesh. 476 00:26:41,245 --> 00:26:44,414 Silver Tree, on this blessed day, 477 00:26:44,415 --> 00:26:46,500 - I take you as my wife... - This is getting weird. 478 00:26:46,501 --> 00:26:49,127 I never should have signed over the pink slip to my Volvo. 479 00:26:49,128 --> 00:26:52,839 And I join my heart to your heart, my soul to your soul, 480 00:26:52,840 --> 00:26:55,793 and my flesh to your flesh. 481 00:27:08,313 --> 00:27:09,564 Keep an eye out for contact. 482 00:27:09,565 --> 00:27:13,359 Obviously, if they're playing basketball, gonna be some hands and shoulders. 483 00:27:13,360 --> 00:27:16,070 But any intimacy, call it off. 484 00:27:16,071 --> 00:27:18,407 - Like, "No touching"? - Right. 485 00:27:18,408 --> 00:27:20,534 And don't ever let them suck you into an argument. 486 00:27:20,535 --> 00:27:21,701 Don't get emotional. 487 00:27:21,702 --> 00:27:26,164 One of my training sergeants told me, "If it feels good, don't say it." 488 00:27:26,165 --> 00:27:27,957 De-escalate the situation. 489 00:27:27,958 --> 00:27:29,333 - De-escalate. Got it. - Right. 490 00:27:29,334 --> 00:27:30,835 - Okay? - Yeah. 491 00:27:30,836 --> 00:27:32,879 All right. Keep an eye on this Uno game over here, 492 00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:34,749 make sure they're not gambling. 493 00:27:38,761 --> 00:27:42,013 So, they'll have six, uh, extra pair. Whoa. 494 00:27:42,014 --> 00:27:44,008 [stammering] Hey, Lolly! 495 00:27:46,436 --> 00:27:47,602 I know you? 496 00:27:47,603 --> 00:27:50,430 Yeah. Chicago? 497 00:27:52,357 --> 00:27:53,558 Um... 498 00:27:54,109 --> 00:27:55,394 Sorry. 499 00:27:56,195 --> 00:27:57,904 Wow. 500 00:27:57,905 --> 00:27:59,906 That is weird. 501 00:27:59,907 --> 00:28:04,953 You know, she didn't have glasses before, so, maybe she was blind in Chicago? 502 00:28:04,954 --> 00:28:09,583 Oh, that thing happened in the yard. I wonder if she's still mad at me. 503 00:28:09,584 --> 00:28:13,462 Wait, she was with us in Chicago? What is she doing here? 504 00:28:13,463 --> 00:28:16,874 Well, anyway. Okay, how many girls do we need? 505 00:28:17,967 --> 00:28:20,009 Only a few to start. We don't know if we have any customers. 506 00:28:20,010 --> 00:28:22,762 And how many days do you think it's gonna take to get 'em, uh... 507 00:28:22,763 --> 00:28:24,131 pungent? 508 00:28:25,099 --> 00:28:26,349 - Three. - Okay. 509 00:28:26,350 --> 00:28:30,269 Ah, that seems like a lot. If it's you? I don't know, two? 510 00:28:30,270 --> 00:28:32,897 - What, why? - You have a strong brew. 511 00:28:32,898 --> 00:28:34,023 Oh. 512 00:28:34,024 --> 00:28:35,399 That's not a bad thing. 513 00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:37,777 Some people just have more... presence than others. 514 00:28:37,778 --> 00:28:39,654 Are you gonna be wearing them? 515 00:28:39,655 --> 00:28:41,490 - Me? No! - Okay. 516 00:28:41,491 --> 00:28:45,076 Can't deal with the thought of dudes inhaling my dried excretions. 517 00:28:45,077 --> 00:28:46,828 No, I will stick to being the brains... 518 00:28:46,829 --> 00:28:48,121 - not the bajingo. - All right. 519 00:28:48,122 --> 00:28:50,331 Okay, we need a mule to carry them out of here. 520 00:28:50,332 --> 00:28:51,791 Yes, panty mule. 521 00:28:51,792 --> 00:28:53,918 Someone gullible, 522 00:28:53,919 --> 00:28:58,047 and insecure enough to be flattered that you picked them. 523 00:28:58,048 --> 00:29:01,300 For the record, I was not gullible, I was trusting. 524 00:29:01,301 --> 00:29:04,303 And perhaps a little... inhibited. 525 00:29:04,304 --> 00:29:05,756 You had a flimsy sense of self. 526 00:29:06,474 --> 00:29:08,394 You dressed head to toe in Urban Outfitters. 527 00:29:09,727 --> 00:29:11,853 There's gotta be a joker in this bunch 528 00:29:11,854 --> 00:29:14,898 who needs a few extra bucks and some warm fuzzies. 529 00:29:14,899 --> 00:29:16,183 [Piper] Hmm. 530 00:29:19,069 --> 00:29:21,655 - That's the one. - Where? 531 00:29:21,656 --> 00:29:23,615 - Bet he doesn't even shave yet. - That guy? 532 00:29:23,616 --> 00:29:24,908 He's like a Gerber baby. 533 00:29:24,909 --> 00:29:26,576 [Piper] What makes you think that we can trust him? 534 00:29:26,577 --> 00:29:28,578 Believe me, that kid is a bug. 535 00:29:28,579 --> 00:29:31,748 He'll piss off the other COs soon enough. And then he'll be looking for friends. 536 00:29:31,749 --> 00:29:33,374 [Piper] So, you tell me how this is gonna work. 537 00:29:33,375 --> 00:29:36,377 "Hi, Gerber, how do you feel about marching past security 538 00:29:36,378 --> 00:29:38,880 with a bunch of dirty panties shoved down your pants?" 539 00:29:38,881 --> 00:29:44,302 See, this is why I will handle this part. Because you have no nuance. 540 00:29:44,303 --> 00:29:47,764 Oh, yeah. Got you now. Bam! Uno, motherfucker! 541 00:29:47,765 --> 00:29:51,935 You cheating bitch! Those ain't the rules! You draw two and lose a turn. 542 00:29:51,936 --> 00:29:53,477 What you saying, I don't know Uno? 543 00:29:53,478 --> 00:29:57,231 I'm saying you sitting on cards and you're a dumb, cheating bitch! 544 00:29:57,232 --> 00:29:58,942 - Fuck you, bitch! - Hey, freeze! 545 00:29:58,943 --> 00:30:01,069 - [both screaming] - [Donaldson] Whoa, whoa, whoa! 546 00:30:01,070 --> 00:30:04,481 - [Donaldson] Ahh! - [Bayley coughing and screaming] 547 00:30:05,783 --> 00:30:08,986 - [gasping and screaming] - [alarm blaring] 548 00:30:09,453 --> 00:30:10,579 [Piper] Whoa! 549 00:30:10,580 --> 00:30:11,788 [screaming continues] 550 00:30:11,789 --> 00:30:14,916 Oh, my God. He's fucking insane! 551 00:30:14,917 --> 00:30:16,701 He's perfect. 552 00:30:17,461 --> 00:30:19,838 - This is unreadable! - What is it? 553 00:30:19,839 --> 00:30:23,216 Suzanne's erotica. It's worse than Fifty Shades! 554 00:30:23,217 --> 00:30:25,927 Not possible. How many times she use the word, "Jeez"? 555 00:30:25,928 --> 00:30:27,428 It's fucking gross. 556 00:30:27,429 --> 00:30:30,640 She's got a sentence that goes on a whole paragraph 557 00:30:30,641 --> 00:30:34,553 about some lady's clit that turns into a caterpillar! 558 00:30:35,104 --> 00:30:36,312 Mmm. 559 00:30:36,313 --> 00:30:40,017 Finished. Two new chapters! 560 00:30:40,693 --> 00:30:43,820 I eagerly await your thoughts, Madam Editor. 561 00:30:43,821 --> 00:30:46,065 Peruse at your leisure. 562 00:30:46,907 --> 00:30:49,033 I ain't perusing shit. 563 00:30:49,034 --> 00:30:52,071 Well, shit, let me see it. 564 00:30:54,123 --> 00:30:56,540 Well, you can't blame her for wanting to escape, all right? 565 00:30:56,541 --> 00:30:57,834 It's lonely as fuck in here. 566 00:30:57,835 --> 00:31:03,958 "The Admiral thrust his pork sword into her squish mitten"? 567 00:31:04,967 --> 00:31:06,300 Oh, shit! 568 00:31:06,301 --> 00:31:08,094 [laughing] Mmm! 569 00:31:08,095 --> 00:31:09,512 What the fuck was that? 570 00:31:09,513 --> 00:31:13,933 You assess the situation and you respond with the appropriate level of force! 571 00:31:13,934 --> 00:31:17,020 And you never, ever, ever discharge your weapon 572 00:31:17,021 --> 00:31:19,397 unless it's absolutely necessary! 573 00:31:19,398 --> 00:31:22,483 And if you do, and that weapon happens to be pepper spray, 574 00:31:22,484 --> 00:31:25,562 you better damn well make sure you're upwind! 575 00:31:26,280 --> 00:31:30,324 You are a trigger-happy knucklehead who just got out of diapers. 576 00:31:30,325 --> 00:31:32,326 But you, how could you let this happen? 577 00:31:32,327 --> 00:31:34,663 Sir, with all due respect, I'm not a nanny. 578 00:31:34,664 --> 00:31:38,499 No! You are an officer with 20 plus years' experience, 579 00:31:38,500 --> 00:31:42,754 and your job was to impart some wisdom on fucking Baby Huey over here! 580 00:31:42,755 --> 00:31:45,799 Well, this is what happens when you put untrained officers in gen pop. 581 00:31:45,800 --> 00:31:49,128 You don't think I know that? I fucking know that! 582 00:31:51,596 --> 00:31:54,015 - Bayley, I should be firing your ass. - I know. 583 00:31:54,016 --> 00:31:58,102 But it's your first day, so I'm gonna chalk this up to mental retardation. 584 00:31:58,103 --> 00:32:03,274 If you so much as look at an inmate wrong in the next week, you're out of here! 585 00:32:03,275 --> 00:32:06,444 Take the stupid fucking nametag off. Now go! 586 00:32:06,445 --> 00:32:09,857 Get your asses down to medical, and get an eyewash. 587 00:32:10,407 --> 00:32:12,951 And read the stupid fucking manuals! 588 00:32:12,952 --> 00:32:14,577 I hate fractions. 589 00:32:14,578 --> 00:32:16,204 - I ain't never gonna use it. - Oh, yeah? 590 00:32:16,205 --> 00:32:18,707 What about when the recipe calls for you to double it, 591 00:32:18,708 --> 00:32:21,375 and you gotta add a cup and a quarter? 592 00:32:21,376 --> 00:32:23,753 You're gonna have to know how to add those two quarters together. 593 00:32:23,754 --> 00:32:25,497 When I'm a prison cook? 594 00:32:27,842 --> 00:32:30,468 All right, let's do number five. 595 00:32:30,469 --> 00:32:34,055 "In Debra's class, three-eighths of the students have brown hair. 596 00:32:34,056 --> 00:32:37,350 Of the students with brown hair, half have brown eyes. 597 00:32:37,351 --> 00:32:39,310 What fraction of the students in Debra's class 598 00:32:39,311 --> 00:32:42,105 have both brown hair and brown eyes?" 599 00:32:42,106 --> 00:32:45,108 Fuck Debra. Right in her brown eye. 600 00:32:45,109 --> 00:32:48,236 Baby, come on, you gotta graduate. 601 00:32:48,237 --> 00:32:50,321 This is fifth-grader math! 602 00:32:50,322 --> 00:32:52,949 I mean, I don't understand it either, okay? 603 00:32:52,950 --> 00:32:58,705 But... we can figure this out. All you gotta do is get a C. 604 00:32:58,706 --> 00:32:59,873 Psst! 605 00:32:59,874 --> 00:33:03,501 - Yo, Mike, you want a bag? - Nah, man, she's not that ugly. 606 00:33:03,502 --> 00:33:05,204 [both laughing] 607 00:33:07,047 --> 00:33:08,415 What does that mean, a bag? 608 00:33:09,759 --> 00:33:13,462 - You selling weed again? - No, it's part of a joke. 609 00:33:14,388 --> 00:33:17,382 - What joke? - You wouldn't get it. 610 00:33:20,435 --> 00:33:21,560 So, you guys really getting along, huh? 611 00:33:21,561 --> 00:33:24,397 Oh, yeah, they've been giggling for the last two hours. 612 00:33:24,398 --> 00:33:26,900 He's fucking hilarious. [laughs] 613 00:33:26,901 --> 00:33:28,317 Hey! Language. 614 00:33:28,318 --> 00:33:30,486 Benny said "fuck" in the car, like, four times. 615 00:33:30,487 --> 00:33:32,655 - You didn't say anything. - Benny doesn't live in our house. 616 00:33:32,656 --> 00:33:34,741 - This is censorship. - Michael. 617 00:33:34,742 --> 00:33:36,868 Fuck that, I'm not a fucking baby. 618 00:33:36,869 --> 00:33:39,788 Knock it off! Does he talk like this around the pastor? 619 00:33:39,789 --> 00:33:42,749 No, this just started. 620 00:33:42,750 --> 00:33:45,334 Well, cut it out. I'm serious. 621 00:33:45,335 --> 00:33:46,961 Fuckity fuck, fuck, fuck. 622 00:33:46,962 --> 00:33:49,047 [Benny laughing] 623 00:33:49,048 --> 00:33:51,590 Mendoza, they need you back in the kitchen. 624 00:33:51,591 --> 00:33:52,675 I'm with my son. 625 00:33:52,676 --> 00:33:54,969 It's an emergency. Ramos cut her finger off. 626 00:33:54,970 --> 00:33:57,806 What? Well, tell them to handle it. 627 00:33:57,807 --> 00:34:00,349 Are you in charge of the kitchen? Let's go. 628 00:34:00,350 --> 00:34:02,761 Your kid can wait in the lobby. 629 00:34:04,479 --> 00:34:06,272 [sighs] 630 00:34:06,273 --> 00:34:07,682 [whispers] Sorry, baby. 631 00:34:08,650 --> 00:34:10,019 Whatever. 632 00:34:17,242 --> 00:34:19,327 - Neri wants a baby. - Mmm. 633 00:34:19,328 --> 00:34:20,536 One day she's ranting about 634 00:34:20,537 --> 00:34:23,081 how irresponsible it is to put more people on the planet, and now, 635 00:34:23,082 --> 00:34:27,418 suddenly, she's clocking her ovulation and welding a nursery mobile 636 00:34:27,419 --> 00:34:30,296 that frankly, between you and me, looks very sharp and dangerous. 637 00:34:30,297 --> 00:34:34,001 Well, maybe you guys should go for it. I think you'd be great parents! 638 00:34:35,135 --> 00:34:39,506 You would be... [chuckles] memorable parents. 639 00:34:41,225 --> 00:34:43,476 I gotta get my shit together, Pipes. 640 00:34:43,477 --> 00:34:46,938 We're still living with Carol and Bill and the layers of taupe are getting to me. 641 00:34:46,939 --> 00:34:50,566 And suddenly, everyone and their mother's got a job. Even Bloomer. 642 00:34:50,567 --> 00:34:51,943 Now that Polly's whipping him into shape... 643 00:34:51,944 --> 00:34:53,895 No, no, no. No. Stop! No Larry. 644 00:34:54,989 --> 00:34:56,780 - He has a job? As what? - Mmm. 645 00:34:56,781 --> 00:35:00,159 He's a regional editor for Zagat. He's got an office and everything. 646 00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:01,736 Really? 647 00:35:02,496 --> 00:35:07,076 Look, all I'm saying is times are a-changing, and I need to work. 648 00:35:09,336 --> 00:35:10,704 I have work for you! 649 00:35:12,464 --> 00:35:13,589 Really? 650 00:35:13,590 --> 00:35:14,798 Could you build me a website? 651 00:35:14,799 --> 00:35:17,676 It could be something very simple, like a WordPress template or something. 652 00:35:17,677 --> 00:35:20,437 Why do you need a website? No one even follows your blog anymore. 653 00:35:21,598 --> 00:35:23,766 I'm starting a used panty business. 654 00:35:23,767 --> 00:35:25,935 There are people 655 00:35:25,936 --> 00:35:29,522 [whispering] who like to sniff dirty underwear. 656 00:35:29,523 --> 00:35:32,025 Oh, I know. 657 00:35:32,026 --> 00:35:35,069 There's a lot of sites. You've got yourself some competition. 658 00:35:35,070 --> 00:35:37,488 Really? Well, then, how much do they go for? 659 00:35:37,489 --> 00:35:38,781 Like, 25 bucks a pop. 660 00:35:38,782 --> 00:35:41,200 But the longer the wear, the more you can tack on. 661 00:35:41,201 --> 00:35:44,162 And there's like a lot of special categories, 662 00:35:44,163 --> 00:35:46,873 like "worn to the gym," or "masturbated in," "peed in." 663 00:35:46,874 --> 00:35:47,957 What about "been to prison"? 664 00:35:47,958 --> 00:35:50,198 Oh, yeah, you could definitely charge more for that. 665 00:35:50,878 --> 00:35:52,753 Pregnant ladies are a big thing, too. 666 00:35:52,754 --> 00:35:54,130 - Really? - Yeah. 667 00:35:54,131 --> 00:35:57,341 I think it's because... maybe they... they smell different. 668 00:35:57,342 --> 00:36:02,096 You know, Neri smells different and she's just talking about getting pregnant. 669 00:36:02,097 --> 00:36:05,766 Wait, are you really gonna start a whole criminal enterprise from behind bars? 670 00:36:05,767 --> 00:36:07,594 No, it's not drugs. It's underwear. 671 00:36:08,645 --> 00:36:10,097 I like your spirit. 672 00:36:12,066 --> 00:36:14,317 I am concerned that you know all of this. 673 00:36:14,318 --> 00:36:16,019 I'm a generalist. 674 00:36:20,074 --> 00:36:23,610 - Hey. Psst. Chapman. - Yeah? 675 00:36:24,286 --> 00:36:25,487 Um... 676 00:36:26,121 --> 00:36:29,165 You think that growing up with all that money was good for you? 677 00:36:29,166 --> 00:36:30,499 In what way? 678 00:36:30,500 --> 00:36:33,377 Like, did being a rich person make you better? 679 00:36:33,378 --> 00:36:36,630 I bet you had, like, ballet, music lessons and shit like that. 680 00:36:36,631 --> 00:36:40,134 Ballet, yeah, yeah. And I did play the flute for two years. 681 00:36:40,135 --> 00:36:42,511 Although "play" is a very strong word. 682 00:36:42,512 --> 00:36:44,888 There's this flute face that I could never... 683 00:36:44,889 --> 00:36:47,516 I never quite got right. 684 00:36:47,517 --> 00:36:51,763 Okay, so... it's a better life when you have money? 685 00:36:52,606 --> 00:36:56,734 A lot of people expect it to fill some sort of emotional hole, 686 00:36:56,735 --> 00:37:00,779 - and all it really does is buy stuff. - Yeah, but what's wrong with stuff? 687 00:37:00,780 --> 00:37:05,118 Stuff is good. Especially when stuff is food or a roof over your head. 688 00:37:05,119 --> 00:37:06,827 You know, there was this study 689 00:37:06,828 --> 00:37:12,583 that said, "Money does buy happiness, up to $75,000 a year." 690 00:37:12,584 --> 00:37:16,462 But after that, increasing your income doesn't make you any happier. 691 00:37:16,463 --> 00:37:17,921 75 grand is a lot. 692 00:37:17,922 --> 00:37:21,835 Yeah, no. I guess... I guess it is. 693 00:37:22,677 --> 00:37:24,296 Are you worried about... 694 00:37:25,180 --> 00:37:26,764 Yeah. 695 00:37:26,765 --> 00:37:28,175 [sighs] 696 00:37:29,268 --> 00:37:31,220 Love is the most important thing. 697 00:37:32,562 --> 00:37:34,981 Yeah, but money helps. 698 00:37:34,982 --> 00:37:39,735 Yeah, money does help. But you know what? We both ended up here. 699 00:37:39,736 --> 00:37:42,814 [sighs] All right. Thanks. 700 00:37:45,075 --> 00:37:46,401 Hey, Dayanara? 701 00:37:47,619 --> 00:37:49,696 What size panties do you wear? 702 00:37:56,836 --> 00:37:58,337 Ay, damn. 703 00:37:58,338 --> 00:38:00,464 Any Jewy movies in here? Shit. 704 00:38:00,465 --> 00:38:02,425 Ain't all movies Jewy? 705 00:38:02,426 --> 00:38:05,344 Like Fiddler on the Roof or some shit like that. 706 00:38:05,345 --> 00:38:09,390 - You know, half of them don't even play. - [scoffs] Shit! 707 00:38:09,391 --> 00:38:12,143 I got to get ahead of this thing. 708 00:38:12,144 --> 00:38:14,645 Come and try and bust me for not being the real Jew deal, 709 00:38:14,646 --> 00:38:16,772 I got to throw some knowledge back at 'em. 710 00:38:16,773 --> 00:38:20,359 Well, look, shouldn't you be reading... What's it called, the Jewish bible? 711 00:38:20,360 --> 00:38:24,113 No, I'm going for the Jewish experience. You feel me? 712 00:38:24,114 --> 00:38:27,325 Get all cultural on them, should be mad convincing. 713 00:38:27,326 --> 00:38:31,613 Man, I need some, like... Seinfeld episodes. 714 00:38:32,039 --> 00:38:34,415 Oh! Ka-ching! 715 00:38:34,416 --> 00:38:38,001 Check it out! Woody fucking Allen. 716 00:38:38,002 --> 00:38:39,795 Now, that's some Jew shit right there. 717 00:38:39,796 --> 00:38:42,298 Look, come on, you really think they gonna test us? 718 00:38:42,299 --> 00:38:44,967 And if they do, you think Woody Allen is gonna save you? 719 00:38:44,968 --> 00:38:49,555 Oh, mark my words, they gonna test us. 720 00:38:49,556 --> 00:38:52,725 Y'all gonna be looking real stupid, but when they come for us... 721 00:38:52,726 --> 00:38:53,851 I'm gonna be ready. 722 00:38:53,852 --> 00:38:56,305 [Crazy Eyes whistling] 723 00:38:59,149 --> 00:39:00,559 Yo, Suzanne. 724 00:39:02,569 --> 00:39:05,113 - I been reading your story. - Okay. 725 00:39:05,114 --> 00:39:06,530 So? 726 00:39:06,531 --> 00:39:10,026 Who does Edwina choose? Gilly or Space Admiral Rodcocker? 727 00:39:10,785 --> 00:39:14,072 - Uh, I haven't decided yet. - You can't leave me hanging here. 728 00:39:14,873 --> 00:39:16,039 [chuckles] 729 00:39:16,040 --> 00:39:17,791 - Yeah, well, technically... - Okay. 730 00:39:17,792 --> 00:39:19,960 ...they're not even in the same timeline. 731 00:39:19,961 --> 00:39:23,756 Admiral is in the future. Gilead is in the past. 732 00:39:23,757 --> 00:39:29,095 And Edwina, she can move through time, but only in one direction. 733 00:39:29,096 --> 00:39:32,973 Yeah, see, don't nobody care about that. Right? They just wanna get off. 734 00:39:32,974 --> 00:39:34,384 You know? 735 00:39:35,935 --> 00:39:37,019 So, you liked it? 736 00:39:37,020 --> 00:39:39,438 You know, it's weird as fuck, right? 737 00:39:39,439 --> 00:39:42,400 - But it just... It sucked me in. - Mmm-hmm. Uh-huh. 738 00:39:42,401 --> 00:39:46,445 I just got to kick back with some bootleg and just escape from this place. 739 00:39:46,446 --> 00:39:50,032 I even lost track of time reading it. Or I blacked out. 740 00:39:50,033 --> 00:39:52,951 Look, either way, this shit is hot. 741 00:39:52,952 --> 00:39:54,495 [Poussey giggling] 742 00:39:54,496 --> 00:39:57,748 Just don't leave a bitch with blue balls. You know what I'm saying? 743 00:39:57,749 --> 00:39:59,208 Yes. 744 00:39:59,209 --> 00:40:01,210 - All right? You got me. - [laughing] Yes. 745 00:40:01,211 --> 00:40:05,289 A'ight. Get to writing. Chop, chop. 746 00:40:06,716 --> 00:40:07,883 Hey, Joe. 747 00:40:07,884 --> 00:40:11,254 I, uh... [chuckling] heard about the little incident out in the yard. 748 00:40:11,721 --> 00:40:13,306 The kid panicked. 749 00:40:13,307 --> 00:40:15,091 - Watch the plant. - Right. 750 00:40:17,060 --> 00:40:18,936 He wasn't ready. 751 00:40:18,937 --> 00:40:21,980 And inmates can sue over things like that. There was a case in Maine. 752 00:40:21,981 --> 00:40:25,769 No, no, no. You were right. It's my bad. 753 00:40:29,281 --> 00:40:32,450 Thank you. That's not how we do things. It's dangerous. 754 00:40:32,451 --> 00:40:33,701 I hear you. What do you want? 755 00:40:33,702 --> 00:40:35,453 Another two-hour class to go over procedure? 756 00:40:35,454 --> 00:40:39,122 I want a proper... 40-hour training period. 757 00:40:39,123 --> 00:40:41,785 How about we split the difference? Six hours? 758 00:40:44,338 --> 00:40:46,004 I'll take what I can get. 759 00:40:46,005 --> 00:40:47,715 Joe, I'm doing my best to work the system, 760 00:40:47,716 --> 00:40:49,883 but there's gonna be a lot of changes around here, 761 00:40:49,884 --> 00:40:51,219 and I need you to be open-minded. 762 00:40:51,220 --> 00:40:53,721 We've got a whole new plan for the kitchen, 763 00:40:53,722 --> 00:40:55,473 work details, processing, a whole bunch of stuff. 764 00:40:55,474 --> 00:41:00,853 It's actually in the packet here and... just whenever you... 765 00:41:00,854 --> 00:41:03,014 - I'm not gonna read those. - Okay. 766 00:41:06,568 --> 00:41:09,362 - What do you do here? - What do you mean? 767 00:41:09,363 --> 00:41:12,899 - What's your official title? - I'm the Director of Human Activity. 768 00:41:13,783 --> 00:41:15,444 What does that even mean? 769 00:41:16,453 --> 00:41:18,036 [laughing] That sounds like God! 770 00:41:18,037 --> 00:41:19,455 [laughing] Yeah. 771 00:41:19,456 --> 00:41:20,789 No, I guess it does, it's... 772 00:41:20,790 --> 00:41:24,042 I have to be honest, this whole corporate structure thing, 773 00:41:24,043 --> 00:41:25,336 I find it confusing. 774 00:41:25,337 --> 00:41:26,754 It's actually really simple. 775 00:41:26,755 --> 00:41:29,172 So, here, you mind if I... 776 00:41:29,173 --> 00:41:33,261 So, you got the... board, right? 777 00:41:33,262 --> 00:41:36,555 And then, you got the CEO, you got the CFO, 778 00:41:36,556 --> 00:41:41,852 you got the various departments, and then here's me, here's you. 779 00:41:41,853 --> 00:41:43,103 See, we're on the same level. 780 00:41:43,104 --> 00:41:46,064 You don't seem to have to check with me to do anything. 781 00:41:46,065 --> 00:41:49,728 Because it actually flows this way. 782 00:41:51,029 --> 00:41:54,240 Through me... to you. 783 00:41:54,241 --> 00:41:56,992 So you're... you're my boss? 784 00:41:56,993 --> 00:42:01,740 No, no, no, we're on the same level. It's just that the flow is... 785 00:42:02,832 --> 00:42:04,333 this way. 786 00:42:04,334 --> 00:42:06,209 You're basically the warden? 787 00:42:06,210 --> 00:42:09,255 No, no, no, 'cause that position doesn't even exist. 788 00:42:09,256 --> 00:42:11,089 No, but it's what you are. 789 00:42:11,090 --> 00:42:15,761 I mean, if you are my boss, then... you're a warden. 790 00:42:15,762 --> 00:42:17,971 No, no, no. We don't call it that. I'm the Director... 791 00:42:17,972 --> 00:42:19,924 The Director of Human Activity. 792 00:42:27,524 --> 00:42:31,102 It's a shame. You were really helping people, Norma. 793 00:42:31,736 --> 00:42:33,404 We still have that time in the chapel. 794 00:42:33,405 --> 00:42:35,365 What are we supposed to do? Meet without you? 795 00:42:37,742 --> 00:42:39,528 Yeah, yeah. 796 00:42:47,377 --> 00:42:51,540 No, I'm fine. Maybe later. My back is acting up. 797 00:42:53,675 --> 00:42:55,426 Aw. 798 00:42:55,427 --> 00:42:57,511 You're sweet, my friend. 799 00:42:57,512 --> 00:42:59,763 Oh. Thank you. 800 00:42:59,764 --> 00:43:01,007 [groans] 801 00:43:01,475 --> 00:43:03,767 The pain is moving around. 802 00:43:03,768 --> 00:43:06,770 It travels from my back, down my arms, 803 00:43:06,771 --> 00:43:09,898 sometimes in my hips. 804 00:43:09,899 --> 00:43:13,394 Lower. Lower, Norma. There. There, there, there, there. 805 00:43:14,446 --> 00:43:15,855 [sighs] 806 00:43:18,367 --> 00:43:21,027 Makes my joints tense being there. 807 00:43:21,745 --> 00:43:24,955 Watching her strut around like it's hers. 808 00:43:24,956 --> 00:43:27,875 Those tacos have no idea what they're doing. 809 00:43:27,876 --> 00:43:31,538 I'm meant to be in charge, Norma. 810 00:43:35,967 --> 00:43:40,137 [chuckling] Of who, you? No, I'm your friend. 811 00:43:40,138 --> 00:43:42,716 Your bossy friend, but still, your friend. 812 00:43:45,560 --> 00:43:49,062 There was this time when Vasily was only six months old, 813 00:43:49,063 --> 00:43:52,232 I had to leave him with my sister-in-law for a week. 814 00:43:52,233 --> 00:43:55,318 We thought Yuri had the measles. 815 00:43:55,319 --> 00:43:59,573 When I came to get him, he cried, and reached for her instead of me. 816 00:43:59,574 --> 00:44:02,401 Like she was his mother. 817 00:44:03,370 --> 00:44:08,282 [voice breaking] I know it sounds crazy... but I have that same feeling now. 818 00:44:09,125 --> 00:44:12,411 That kitchen is my baby! 819 00:44:24,766 --> 00:44:28,052 Is this the thing you do? The magic? 820 00:44:29,813 --> 00:44:33,524 Well, stop it. I'm not comfortable with that. 821 00:44:33,525 --> 00:44:36,310 Come on, Norma, let's get back to the real thing. 822 00:44:40,907 --> 00:44:42,942 [music playing on radio] 823 00:44:49,123 --> 00:44:50,491 What is that? 824 00:44:51,835 --> 00:44:54,294 Why? What's the point? 825 00:44:54,295 --> 00:44:56,254 - We don't have any members. - [turns off radio] 826 00:44:56,255 --> 00:44:59,292 And even if they wanted to come, where would we gather? 827 00:45:00,927 --> 00:45:03,721 What, along the side of the fucking highway? 828 00:45:03,722 --> 00:45:06,132 What next, rest-stop bathrooms? 829 00:45:07,141 --> 00:45:08,634 [Guru Mack sighs] 830 00:45:08,935 --> 00:45:13,765 All those wives, and I'm left with you. My one true believer. 831 00:45:14,566 --> 00:45:16,817 So much for sacred vows. 832 00:45:16,818 --> 00:45:21,314 No way I'm going down on those trumped-up bullshit charges. 833 00:45:23,407 --> 00:45:26,827 Those girls were there of their own accord. 834 00:45:26,828 --> 00:45:29,030 And since when is tithing against the law? 835 00:45:31,374 --> 00:45:33,083 We got to get off the grid. 836 00:45:33,084 --> 00:45:36,037 - Get back to the woods, commune with Gaia. - [car rattling] 837 00:45:37,756 --> 00:45:39,297 [car backfiring] 838 00:45:39,298 --> 00:45:40,917 Shit! 839 00:45:42,761 --> 00:45:44,670 - [Guru Mack grunts] - [tires squeal] 840 00:45:45,514 --> 00:45:49,266 You fucking piece of shit! Come on! 841 00:45:49,267 --> 00:45:51,469 Fuck, fuck, fuck! 842 00:45:54,856 --> 00:45:56,064 - [door slams] - [Norma gasps] 843 00:45:56,065 --> 00:45:58,267 Oh, fuck! 844 00:45:59,402 --> 00:46:02,738 You bitch! You bitch! You bitch! You bitch! 845 00:46:02,739 --> 00:46:06,025 Bitch! Bitch! Bitch! Bitch! 846 00:46:06,743 --> 00:46:07,986 Come on! 847 00:46:09,495 --> 00:46:12,706 Bitch! God damn it! 848 00:46:12,707 --> 00:46:14,207 [Guru Mack groaning] 849 00:46:14,208 --> 00:46:15,409 Shit! 850 00:46:17,003 --> 00:46:21,131 One kick if you want money. 851 00:46:21,132 --> 00:46:24,176 Two kicks if you want to live on 149th with Grandma. 852 00:46:24,177 --> 00:46:27,171 How about I give you three kicks if you don't shut the fuck up? 853 00:46:28,557 --> 00:46:31,058 You're taking advice from a fucking fetus now? 854 00:46:31,059 --> 00:46:35,062 Nice. You trust a stupid little fetus more than me. 855 00:46:35,063 --> 00:46:36,939 I'm just trying to do the right thing. 856 00:46:36,940 --> 00:46:39,392 This is the right thing. 857 00:46:40,276 --> 00:46:43,779 What happens when you get out of here and you can't even live in public housing 858 00:46:43,780 --> 00:46:45,113 'cause you got a record? 859 00:46:45,114 --> 00:46:49,485 And you gotta pull change out of a sofa for a dollar meal? 860 00:46:50,829 --> 00:46:53,697 Why you think I've been in a bad mood for 24 years? 861 00:46:56,209 --> 00:46:57,585 You've had your good days. 862 00:46:57,586 --> 00:46:58,828 [scoffs] 863 00:46:59,963 --> 00:47:01,330 Name one. 864 00:47:04,300 --> 00:47:06,252 My 17th birthday. 865 00:47:06,720 --> 00:47:11,098 You took me to the day spa, we sat in the hot pool, 866 00:47:11,099 --> 00:47:13,016 we made fun of the lady with the big ass mole. 867 00:47:13,017 --> 00:47:14,593 [both laugh] 868 00:47:15,269 --> 00:47:17,221 And we got our toes done. 869 00:47:18,982 --> 00:47:21,225 I was so happy that day. 870 00:47:21,943 --> 00:47:25,320 Because Cesar gave me a fistful of cash. 871 00:47:25,321 --> 00:47:27,114 You liked me because I was buying you things. 872 00:47:27,115 --> 00:47:31,235 No. You were nice to me. 873 00:47:31,911 --> 00:47:33,662 Most of the time, you were such a bitch. 874 00:47:33,663 --> 00:47:36,782 Maybe I wouldn't have been a bitch if we had money. 875 00:47:38,042 --> 00:47:41,830 All I ever wanted was to spend time with you. 876 00:47:47,218 --> 00:47:49,587 You were stupid to want me. 877 00:47:50,554 --> 00:47:53,883 Kids are dumb, you gotta make decisions for them. 878 00:47:55,018 --> 00:47:57,853 You're gonna put a kid in a car seat and they're gonna scream and scream. 879 00:47:57,854 --> 00:48:00,534 You're not gonna take 'em out and put 'em on your lap, are you? 880 00:48:00,606 --> 00:48:02,482 You used to make Emilio ride in the trunk. 881 00:48:02,483 --> 00:48:03,734 That's not the point. 882 00:48:03,735 --> 00:48:08,321 Imagine you had some really rich family who could really provide for you. 883 00:48:08,322 --> 00:48:12,159 You probably would be a famous artist right now, instead of in here. 884 00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:15,196 You keep that baby, you're being selfish. 885 00:48:17,957 --> 00:48:20,167 [Gloria] I had to remake 200 dinners from scratch 886 00:48:20,168 --> 00:48:24,046 because the tip of your fucking pinky was floating around the stew somewhere. 887 00:48:24,047 --> 00:48:27,090 If you're gonna chop your finger off, you couldn't do it away from my food? 888 00:48:27,091 --> 00:48:29,002 I'm having a hard day. 889 00:48:30,136 --> 00:48:33,013 - Why weren't you watching her? - I can't do nothing with stupid. 890 00:48:33,014 --> 00:48:37,935 How am I supposed to be a mother to my son when my prison kids keep fucking it up? 891 00:48:37,936 --> 00:48:40,896 - You could start with your language. - Excuse me, what? 892 00:48:40,897 --> 00:48:42,690 [Sophia] Maybe try not to curse so much? 893 00:48:42,691 --> 00:48:46,234 Or at least tell your son not to. At least not around my Michael. 894 00:48:46,235 --> 00:48:47,778 What are you talking about? 895 00:48:47,779 --> 00:48:49,780 My son has never cursed before. 896 00:48:49,781 --> 00:48:51,614 And one ride with your kid, 897 00:48:51,615 --> 00:48:54,284 and suddenly, it's "Fuck this, and fuck that." 898 00:48:54,285 --> 00:48:57,746 He's 15. So what? He says "fuck." 899 00:48:57,747 --> 00:49:00,283 We don't talk like that in our house. 900 00:49:01,209 --> 00:49:06,205 You think my son is your son's problem? 901 00:49:08,216 --> 00:49:13,804 Tell Benny... to cool it with the dirty jokes and language. 902 00:49:13,805 --> 00:49:16,215 That is, if he wants to keep his ride. 903 00:49:22,605 --> 00:49:23,939 [yelling in Spanish] 904 00:49:23,940 --> 00:49:25,607 Fuck me! 905 00:49:25,608 --> 00:49:28,693 Somebody keeps leaving the handle over the fucking burner! 906 00:49:28,694 --> 00:49:30,278 Shit. 907 00:49:30,279 --> 00:49:33,656 Mendoza? What's this I hear about Ramos cutting her finger off? 908 00:49:33,657 --> 00:49:35,868 It was just the tip of her pinky. 909 00:49:35,869 --> 00:49:38,912 I would've been here... I would've cut her head off, too. 910 00:49:38,913 --> 00:49:42,916 Well, why weren't you here? Your work duty takes priority. 911 00:49:42,917 --> 00:49:45,710 We have entrusted you with a huge responsibility, 912 00:49:45,711 --> 00:49:49,589 and that means you can't take off whenever you get a visitor or a headache. 913 00:49:49,590 --> 00:49:52,885 You know what gives me a headache? This job! 914 00:49:52,886 --> 00:49:56,805 I gotta be there for my son because he needs a mother! 915 00:49:56,806 --> 00:50:00,183 I didn't ask for this shit. You know that my ankles are swollen. 916 00:50:00,184 --> 00:50:01,559 I got callouses! 917 00:50:01,560 --> 00:50:05,438 And then, my hair... [inhales deeply] smells like canola oil. 918 00:50:05,439 --> 00:50:08,684 I fucking hate this place! I quit! 919 00:50:10,153 --> 00:50:12,771 You can't quit. This is prison. 920 00:50:14,657 --> 00:50:15,941 [sighs] 921 00:50:17,076 --> 00:50:18,819 And there's nobody else to do it. 922 00:50:25,459 --> 00:50:27,585 Jesus. 923 00:50:27,586 --> 00:50:30,672 Yeah, give it to her. I'm done. 924 00:50:30,673 --> 00:50:35,211 She wants this so bad... [laughing] let her have it! 925 00:50:35,594 --> 00:50:36,920 [speaking Spanish] 926 00:50:40,058 --> 00:50:41,384 Okay, Reznikov. 927 00:50:42,143 --> 00:50:44,303 You're up. Enjoy. 928 00:51:14,968 --> 00:51:18,887 You know... you can cut an extra one from that piece of fabric. 929 00:51:18,888 --> 00:51:19,972 I don't want them. 930 00:51:19,973 --> 00:51:23,600 Well, you could wear them until they're really dirty and then give them to me. 931 00:51:23,601 --> 00:51:26,353 Okay, Chapman. 932 00:51:26,354 --> 00:51:30,224 No, no, it's not for me. They're to, um... 933 00:51:31,817 --> 00:51:33,352 They're to sell to creepy dudes. 934 00:51:34,737 --> 00:51:36,230 Why would I wanna do that? 935 00:51:38,992 --> 00:51:41,152 Because I'm asking you. 936 00:51:43,412 --> 00:51:46,456 This is official Whispers merchandise. 937 00:51:46,457 --> 00:51:48,409 [laughs] 938 00:52:08,312 --> 00:52:09,722 [chuckles] 939 00:52:23,869 --> 00:52:25,870 - Piper, right? - Yeah. 940 00:52:25,871 --> 00:52:28,081 - [gasps] Oh, you're the murderer! - No. 941 00:52:28,082 --> 00:52:30,167 It's a long story, but it's fine. She's fine. 942 00:52:30,168 --> 00:52:33,954 She probably is the person who took you on a tour when you first got here. 943 00:52:34,797 --> 00:52:36,339 I didn't kill her. 944 00:52:36,340 --> 00:52:37,507 Oh, the little wiry one? 945 00:52:37,508 --> 00:52:40,135 - Yeah. - Yeah, you should have killed her. 946 00:52:40,136 --> 00:52:43,714 But it's nice to see you, man! We're a long way from Chicago. 947 00:52:46,475 --> 00:52:50,846 You know, I actually wanted to apologize to you... about Chicago. 948 00:52:52,815 --> 00:52:55,275 I should have stepped in when that woman jumped you. 949 00:52:55,276 --> 00:52:57,694 What? Come on. What you gonna do about that? 950 00:52:57,695 --> 00:53:00,572 You're supposed to get your ass beat over some stranger? 951 00:53:00,573 --> 00:53:04,117 - Come on, it's all right. - That's kind of what I was thinking, yeah. 952 00:53:04,118 --> 00:53:06,203 Don't worry about it. 953 00:53:06,204 --> 00:53:10,491 Oh, and... how great is this place? 954 00:53:11,834 --> 00:53:14,077 Dude, I fucking love it here. 955 00:53:15,046 --> 00:53:17,214 Um, I am the kosher meal, please. 956 00:53:17,215 --> 00:53:20,168 - Hey, no. I was next. - Are you? 957 00:53:28,267 --> 00:53:30,227 Smooth like butter. 958 00:53:30,228 --> 00:53:31,394 You, Captain Four Fingers, 959 00:53:31,395 --> 00:53:35,232 get those green beans off the burner while they're still green! 960 00:53:35,233 --> 00:53:36,899 Norma, where's that corn bread? 961 00:53:36,900 --> 00:53:39,152 You've lost your speed, woman. Let's go. 962 00:53:39,153 --> 00:53:42,273 You're leaving a snail trail on my floor. 963 00:53:44,408 --> 00:53:46,109 You're gonna put up with that? 964 00:53:49,080 --> 00:53:53,992 Norma, check on the line, make sure those trays aren't cold. 965 00:53:54,585 --> 00:53:56,287 I saw that evil eye. 966 00:53:57,546 --> 00:54:00,465 [Guru Mack] I just... want to be a crow. 967 00:54:00,466 --> 00:54:04,086 Why can't I be a crow? 968 00:54:04,928 --> 00:54:10,426 I am a speck in the universe. A miserable speck. 969 00:54:18,276 --> 00:54:19,484 [sighs] 970 00:54:19,485 --> 00:54:22,062 Why are you still here, Norma? 971 00:54:23,947 --> 00:54:29,744 Why are you following me... after all these years? Go! 972 00:54:29,745 --> 00:54:34,325 Run away like the rest of them. They were right, I'm a fraud. 973 00:54:35,126 --> 00:54:39,372 I'm a false prophet, Norma. I'm not your God. 974 00:54:40,173 --> 00:54:44,167 You have wasted your life on a worthless man. 975 00:54:45,344 --> 00:54:50,258 Human. Not special. Not honest. Not good. 976 00:54:50,974 --> 00:54:53,185 And now, I'm old. 977 00:54:53,186 --> 00:54:58,807 And you're old and childless... and poor and damned. 978 00:55:01,860 --> 00:55:02,985 [sobbing] 979 00:55:02,986 --> 00:55:04,187 Argh! 980 00:55:05,406 --> 00:55:07,650 You're never gonna leave, are you? 981 00:55:09,410 --> 00:55:11,779 Because you are a slave. 982 00:55:13,914 --> 00:55:16,166 A meek little servant. 983 00:55:16,167 --> 00:55:18,210 And you'll never be anything else. 984 00:55:18,211 --> 00:55:22,714 And If I didn't tell you where to go and what to do, you would have no self at all. 985 00:55:22,715 --> 00:55:24,006 - Nothing! - [gasps] 986 00:55:24,007 --> 00:55:25,925 Silent nothing! 987 00:55:25,926 --> 00:55:27,878 Worshipping nothing! 988 00:55:31,265 --> 00:55:33,175 Speak, woman. 989 00:55:34,435 --> 00:55:36,345 Fucking speak! 990 00:55:38,522 --> 00:55:39,973 You won't, will you? 991 00:55:40,983 --> 00:55:42,234 And you know why? 992 00:55:42,235 --> 00:55:45,112 Because you have nothing to say! 993 00:55:45,113 --> 00:55:46,480 [grunts] 994 00:55:47,281 --> 00:55:48,732 [Guru Mack screaming] 995 00:55:49,325 --> 00:55:50,651 [thuds] 996 00:55:51,369 --> 00:55:52,945 [crow cawing] 997 00:55:55,248 --> 00:55:58,116 [stuttering] Son of a... 998 00:55:59,210 --> 00:56:00,585 bitch! 999 00:56:00,586 --> 00:56:02,245 [sobbing] 1000 00:56:07,593 --> 00:56:09,427 [Red] To a meal well done. 1001 00:56:09,428 --> 00:56:12,889 You have embraced your new general with dignity. 1002 00:56:12,890 --> 00:56:14,891 [speaking Spanish] Did we have a choice? 1003 00:56:14,892 --> 00:56:18,770 [speaking English] Not really, but you did well anyway. I toast you all. 1004 00:56:18,771 --> 00:56:20,772 [trolley approaching] 1005 00:56:20,773 --> 00:56:23,183 Ladies, get ready to thank me. 1006 00:56:25,819 --> 00:56:26,944 What is this? 1007 00:56:26,945 --> 00:56:30,023 The wave of the future. 1008 00:56:31,325 --> 00:56:33,694 Pre-packaged... 1009 00:56:35,496 --> 00:56:37,448 boil in the bag meals. 1010 00:56:37,956 --> 00:56:40,208 Your lives just got a hell of a lot easier. 1011 00:56:40,209 --> 00:56:42,786 Dump these babies in the steamer... 1012 00:56:44,087 --> 00:56:45,297 and call it a day. 1013 00:56:45,298 --> 00:56:47,799 [exclaims] Tell me this is a joke. 1014 00:56:47,800 --> 00:56:50,385 No... it was a memo. 1015 00:56:50,386 --> 00:56:54,256 From Jeffrey in Food Services and Linda in Purchasing. 1016 00:56:55,308 --> 00:57:00,012 You didn't think I'd put you in charge if you actually had any power, did you? 1017 00:57:01,355 --> 00:57:02,765 [clicks tongue] 1018 00:57:04,107 --> 00:57:06,018 [inmates chuckling] 1019 00:57:26,714 --> 00:57:28,631 She's not gonna come. 1020 00:57:28,632 --> 00:57:31,092 Maybe we should take turns leading the prayer circle? 1021 00:57:31,093 --> 00:57:33,678 Or we could just keep meeting with her one on one? 1022 00:57:33,679 --> 00:57:36,214 But I thought the whole point of this was to organize. 1023 00:57:38,601 --> 00:57:39,927 [gasps] 1024 00:57:40,811 --> 00:57:43,020 I told you. What did I tell you? 1025 00:57:43,021 --> 00:57:46,349 Non-believers, all of you. Nobody ever listens to me. 1026 00:57:52,865 --> 00:57:54,407 What is she doing? 1027 00:57:54,408 --> 00:57:56,444 - Shh! - Oh, that felt good. 1028 00:57:58,996 --> 00:58:00,573 [inmate] Oh, yeah. 1029 00:58:01,749 --> 00:58:03,992 [sobbing] Oh, thank you. 1030 00:58:07,880 --> 00:58:08,963 Wow. 1031 00:58:08,964 --> 00:58:11,208 [inmates laughing] 1032 00:58:17,473 --> 00:58:18,966 Do you feel that energy? 1033 00:58:19,892 --> 00:58:22,143 Oh, my gosh, I'm feeling like I'm glowing. Am I glowing? 1034 00:58:22,144 --> 00:58:24,096 [all laughing] 1035 00:58:29,402 --> 00:58:31,604 [folk-rock music playing] 1036 00:58:38,796 --> 00:58:45,296 Subtitle sync and corrections by awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com. 1037 00:58:46,305 --> 00:59:46,242 Watch Movies, Series & LiveTV www.flixify.app