1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 2 00:00:24,689 --> 00:00:28,682 Mysteries in History, with your host, Peter Graves. 3 00:00:28,849 --> 00:00:32,637 Although no one has ever been able to prove their existence... 4 00:00:32,809 --> 00:00:35,801 ... a quasi-government agency, the Men in Black... 5 00:00:35,969 --> 00:00:39,166 ... supposedly carries out operations here on Earth... 6 00:00:39,329 --> 00:00:43,242 ... in order to k eep us safe from aliens throughout the galaxies. 7 00:00:43,409 --> 00:00:46,765 Here is one of their stories that "never happened"... 8 00:00:46,929 --> 00:00:50,968 ... from one of their files that doesn't exist. 9 00:00:51,529 --> 00:00:55,522 1978. The leaders of Zartha flee their planet... 10 00:00:55,689 --> 00:01:00,717 ... in order to escape the clutches of the evil Kylothian, Serleena. 11 00:01:01,209 --> 00:01:04,963 Arriving on Earth, the Zarthans bring with them their greatest treasure... 12 00:01:05,289 --> 00:01:09,168 The Light of Zartha, a cosmic force so powerful... 13 00:01:09,329 --> 00:01:13,686 ... that in the wrong hands it could lead to the annihilation of Zartha. 14 00:01:14,169 --> 00:01:17,445 The Zarthans' princess, Lauranna, beseeched the Men in Black... 15 00:01:17,609 --> 00:01:19,839 ... to hide the Light from Serleena. 16 00:01:20,329 --> 00:01:22,240 But they had no choice. 17 00:01:22,409 --> 00:01:25,765 Intervention would have meant the destruction of the Earth. 18 00:01:27,049 --> 00:01:31,964 However, in an act of galactic bravery, the Men in Black subdued Serleena... 19 00:01:32,129 --> 00:01:34,245 ... allowing the Zarthans to escape... 20 00:01:34,409 --> 00:01:37,924 ... so they might hide the Light on another planet. 21 00:01:39,049 --> 00:01:43,520 Serleena, released from her captors, v owed that the Light would be hers... 22 00:01:43,689 --> 00:01:48,365 ... and that she would destroy any planet that stood in her way. 23 00:01:49,529 --> 00:01:52,168 And so, never knowing what happened... 24 00:01:52,329 --> 00:01:57,323 ... the people of Earth were saved by a secret society of protectors... 25 00:01:57,489 --> 00:02:00,447 ... known as the Men in Black. 26 00:03:35,529 --> 00:03:37,326 Harvey! 27 00:03:38,409 --> 00:03:40,798 Harvey, get over here! 28 00:03:41,289 --> 00:03:43,359 Harvey. Heel, heel! 29 00:03:43,529 --> 00:03:45,679 You're barking at the moon, moron. 30 00:03:45,849 --> 00:03:47,521 Harvey. Harvey! 31 00:05:43,889 --> 00:05:45,607 Hey, pretty lady. 32 00:05:46,529 --> 00:05:48,167 You taste good. 33 00:05:52,169 --> 00:05:53,363 Hey, what the...? 34 00:05:58,249 --> 00:06:00,558 Yeah, you too. 35 00:06:47,609 --> 00:06:49,964 Nothing fancy, no heroics. By the book. 36 00:06:50,129 --> 00:06:51,528 Got it. Hey! 37 00:06:52,609 --> 00:06:54,884 Hey, Jeff. What's happening, buddy? 38 00:06:55,049 --> 00:06:58,837 - We were wondering why you're here. - The man's talking to you. 39 00:06:59,169 --> 00:07:03,082 You know our arrangements. Stay in the E, F and R subway lines... 40 00:07:03,249 --> 00:07:05,604 ...and you get all the garbage you want. 41 00:07:05,769 --> 00:07:08,363 What the hell are you doing here, worm boy? 42 00:07:08,529 --> 00:07:09,518 Tee. 43 00:07:10,089 --> 00:07:11,363 Jeff... 44 00:07:11,529 --> 00:07:13,645 Excuse my partner. He's new and he's... 45 00:07:18,769 --> 00:07:19,249 ...kind of stupid. 46 00:07:19,249 --> 00:07:19,809 ...kind of stupid. 47 00:07:26,929 --> 00:07:29,762 You getting big, Jeff. Boy, what you been eating? 48 00:07:33,769 --> 00:07:35,521 You like jokes, huh? 49 00:07:37,929 --> 00:07:39,521 Jeffrey! 50 00:07:46,289 --> 00:07:47,483 All right. 51 00:07:48,889 --> 00:07:50,641 Sweet dreams, big boy. 52 00:08:24,249 --> 00:08:25,762 Sweet dreams... 53 00:08:30,289 --> 00:08:31,688 ...big boy. 54 00:08:31,849 --> 00:08:34,522 Transit authority. Move to the forward car. 55 00:08:34,689 --> 00:08:37,157 We got a bug in the electrical system. 56 00:08:39,129 --> 00:08:43,998 People! We got a bug in the electrical system! 57 00:08:47,689 --> 00:08:49,281 Now y'all running? 58 00:08:49,449 --> 00:08:51,087 No, no, no! Sit down! 59 00:08:51,249 --> 00:08:53,126 It's only a 600-foot worm. 60 00:08:56,289 --> 00:09:00,168 - Everybody out. - Put the hammer down on this thing. 61 00:09:00,329 --> 00:09:03,685 I'm Captain Larry Bridgewater. I decide what happens. 62 00:09:03,849 --> 00:09:06,363 You decide? Okay, come here. Come here. 63 00:09:06,529 --> 00:09:08,485 Larry? That's my man, Jeff. 64 00:09:11,689 --> 00:09:15,682 - Larry just made a decision. - Larry need to take his ass in there. 65 00:09:22,889 --> 00:09:25,278 Don't make me do this, Jeff! 66 00:09:50,089 --> 00:09:51,807 Eighty-first Street. 67 00:09:55,689 --> 00:09:56,804 Just a second. 68 00:09:58,089 --> 00:10:00,808 May I have your attention, please? 69 00:10:01,289 --> 00:10:04,042 We thank you for participating in our drill. 70 00:10:04,209 --> 00:10:07,167 Had this been an emergency, you'd have been eaten. 71 00:10:07,329 --> 00:10:09,763 Because you don't listen. You're ignorant. 72 00:10:09,929 --> 00:10:13,922 How a man gonna bash through...? That's the problem with New Yorkers. 73 00:10:14,089 --> 00:10:17,604 "We've seen it all. A 600-foot worm! Save us, Mr. Black Man!" 74 00:10:17,769 --> 00:10:21,762 I ask you nice, " Move to the next car." You just sit there like... 75 00:10:23,649 --> 00:10:25,241 Thank you for participating. 76 00:10:25,409 --> 00:10:29,118 Hopefully, you enjoyed our smaller, energy-efficient subway cars. 77 00:10:29,609 --> 00:10:32,567 Watch your step. You will have a nice evening. 78 00:10:36,009 --> 00:10:39,445 I need a cleanup crew at 81 st and Central Park West. 79 00:10:39,609 --> 00:10:41,998 Revoke Jeff's movement privileges. 80 00:10:42,169 --> 00:10:44,888 Have him escorted to the Chambers Street station. 81 00:10:45,049 --> 00:10:49,804 And please check the expiration date on the unipod worm tranquillizers. 82 00:10:53,969 --> 00:10:55,721 Sorry, fellas. Station closed. 83 00:10:56,009 --> 00:11:00,082 - Emergency drill. For your safety. - Do you believe these putzes? 84 00:11:01,609 --> 00:11:03,042 You're welcome. 85 00:11:16,169 --> 00:11:18,319 I know, by the book. 86 00:11:18,489 --> 00:11:22,767 Tee, when was the last time we just looked at the stars? 87 00:11:22,929 --> 00:11:25,807 This is a test. I can do this. 88 00:11:28,169 --> 00:11:30,603 Ever feel like you're alone in the universe? 89 00:11:30,769 --> 00:11:32,202 Yes. 90 00:11:34,129 --> 00:11:35,687 No. 91 00:11:37,889 --> 00:11:40,801 - Hey, let me buy you a piece of pie. - Really? 92 00:11:41,489 --> 00:11:42,683 Thanks. 93 00:11:43,409 --> 00:11:46,082 Hey, you're not alone in the universe. 94 00:11:46,249 --> 00:11:48,319 - Remove the arm. - Okay. 95 00:11:51,409 --> 00:11:52,369 Please, shut up, Charlie. 96 00:11:52,369 --> 00:11:53,329 Please, shut up, Charlie. 97 00:11:53,329 --> 00:11:54,169 I'm tired of you constantly talking behind my back. 98 00:11:54,169 --> 00:11:56,842 I'm tired of you constantly talking behind my back. 99 00:11:58,569 --> 00:12:02,244 You meet a girl. She's into it. The best line you come up with is: 100 00:12:02,409 --> 00:12:06,402 "Wanna come back to my place for some tonsil hockey and egg salad?" 101 00:12:06,729 --> 00:12:10,085 - Who are you and how'd you get in here? - You like egg salad? 102 00:12:13,209 --> 00:12:14,562 Serleena! 103 00:12:14,729 --> 00:12:17,801 Why didn't you say it was you? 104 00:12:18,569 --> 00:12:21,037 - Where's the Light? - Here's the deal. 105 00:12:21,209 --> 00:12:23,484 You're looking for this Light. We found it. 106 00:12:23,649 --> 00:12:27,767 You want it, it'll cost you 50 mill. Here's how it'll work. First... 107 00:12:27,929 --> 00:12:30,727 Where is the Light? 108 00:12:35,489 --> 00:12:39,641 We couldn't find it, but we found a guy who might know where it is. 109 00:12:39,809 --> 00:12:42,721 He runs a pizza parlour on Spring Street. 110 00:12:44,009 --> 00:12:47,684 Let's go. And wipe your nose, idiot. 111 00:12:53,849 --> 00:12:56,488 - Good pie. - Yeah. 112 00:12:57,929 --> 00:12:59,362 Crowded. 113 00:12:59,529 --> 00:13:01,201 Well, they got good pie. 114 00:13:06,449 --> 00:13:07,723 What's wrong with you? 115 00:13:07,889 --> 00:13:10,005 - You're gonna neuralyze me. - No, I'm not. 116 00:13:10,169 --> 00:13:12,637 You took me here so I wouldn't make a scene. 117 00:13:12,809 --> 00:13:14,527 You making a scene. 118 00:13:15,209 --> 00:13:18,406 Let me ask you a question. Why did you join MiB? 119 00:13:18,569 --> 00:13:21,925 Six years in the Marines. I like the action. Protect the planet. 120 00:13:22,089 --> 00:13:25,286 You like being a hero? You joined the wrong organization. 121 00:13:25,929 --> 00:13:29,285 - You ever heard of James Edwards? - No. 122 00:13:29,689 --> 00:13:33,284 Well, he saved the lives of 85 people on the subway tonight. 123 00:13:33,449 --> 00:13:35,360 No one knows he exists. 124 00:13:35,849 --> 00:13:40,559 And if no one knows he exists, how can anyone ever love him? 125 00:13:44,169 --> 00:13:46,319 Hey, how long we been partners? 126 00:13:46,489 --> 00:13:49,322 - Feb 1. - Five months, three days. 127 00:13:49,489 --> 00:13:52,083 - Started at noon. - Nine hours. 128 00:13:58,849 --> 00:14:01,204 Get married. Have a bunch of kids. 129 00:14:01,689 --> 00:14:03,281 Okay. 130 00:14:05,929 --> 00:14:11,208 Excuse me. My buddy's kind of shy, but he thinks you are hot. 131 00:14:16,289 --> 00:14:17,278 Here it is. 132 00:14:18,849 --> 00:14:20,248 I don't know what to say. 133 00:14:20,409 --> 00:14:23,207 Years from now, you know what people'll say? 134 00:14:23,369 --> 00:14:26,566 - " Employee" is misspelled? - They charge by the letter. 135 00:14:26,729 --> 00:14:30,722 They'll say, " lmagine that. Big shot like her used to work here." 136 00:14:30,889 --> 00:14:32,208 - Ben... - You deserve it. 137 00:14:32,369 --> 00:14:35,361 Bring up a case of Mountain Dew from the basement. 138 00:14:38,049 --> 00:14:39,767 Hey, Bruno. 139 00:14:40,729 --> 00:14:45,086 Two slices of pepperoni and information about the Light of Zartha. 140 00:14:45,249 --> 00:14:48,480 - Whoever you are, don't hurt me. - Where's the Light, Ben? 141 00:14:48,649 --> 00:14:51,925 I don't know what you're talking about. Let me down, ma'am. 142 00:14:52,089 --> 00:14:54,080 I want to report a robbery... 143 00:15:01,289 --> 00:15:02,802 There. 144 00:15:03,369 --> 00:15:04,563 Noise. 145 00:15:06,009 --> 00:15:07,408 Kitchen! 146 00:15:11,249 --> 00:15:13,285 You idiots see anything? 147 00:15:13,449 --> 00:15:16,327 Wind blew the door open. 148 00:15:16,969 --> 00:15:18,880 Nothing out of the ordinary. 149 00:15:19,209 --> 00:15:22,246 For 25 years, I've travelled the universe looking for it. 150 00:15:22,409 --> 00:15:25,207 But it never left Earth, did it? You kept it here. 151 00:15:25,369 --> 00:15:27,041 What are you talking about? 152 00:15:27,209 --> 00:15:29,598 I'm running out of time. Where's the Light? 153 00:15:29,769 --> 00:15:32,488 - I don't know what you mean. - Listen, Zarthan. 154 00:15:32,649 --> 00:15:35,083 You hid the Light on Earth. I'll find it. 155 00:15:35,249 --> 00:15:38,639 Once we have the Light, Zartha will be ours. 156 00:15:38,809 --> 00:15:41,277 You're too late. Tomorrow at midnight... 157 00:15:41,449 --> 00:15:44,805 ...the Light will leave the third planet and be back home. 158 00:15:44,969 --> 00:15:48,120 Sorry you made the trip for nothing. 159 00:15:57,009 --> 00:15:59,477 Now we don't know if it's on Earth or not. 160 00:15:59,649 --> 00:16:01,924 He said third planet. It's here, you idiot. 161 00:16:02,089 --> 00:16:05,638 - Third Rock from the Sun. - I never got that till now. 162 00:16:06,129 --> 00:16:09,838 It's on Earth, and I know who's gonna tell me where it is. 163 00:16:33,649 --> 00:16:36,209 - Don't you ever go home? - Nope. 164 00:16:36,369 --> 00:16:39,042 I see you neuralyzed another partner. 165 00:16:45,369 --> 00:16:47,929 Bee, Dee, when you use a fission carboniser... 166 00:16:48,089 --> 00:16:51,684 ...attach a de-atomizer so it doesn't sound like a cannon. 167 00:16:51,849 --> 00:16:55,967 Hey, get some booties on them things. You're crapping up the floor. 168 00:16:59,209 --> 00:17:00,562 Check his visa. 169 00:17:00,729 --> 00:17:04,722 The Cephalopods have been making counterfeits at Kinko's on Canal. 170 00:17:04,889 --> 00:17:09,917 And why do I have a dead Tricrainasloph going through passport control? 171 00:17:10,089 --> 00:17:14,082 That'd be my fault. I'm very sorry. Please don't neuralyze me, sir. 172 00:17:14,249 --> 00:17:17,639 - What the hell's that supposed to mean? - Nothing, sir. 173 00:17:21,009 --> 00:17:22,522 Good work in the subway. 174 00:17:22,689 --> 00:17:26,398 - I remember Jeff when he was yea high. - What you got for me? 175 00:17:26,569 --> 00:17:28,799 Look. See those guys in black suits? 176 00:17:28,969 --> 00:17:31,881 - They work here. We got it covered. - Zed, what you got? 177 00:17:32,049 --> 00:17:36,122 Dedication's one thing, but this job will eat you up and spit you out. 178 00:17:36,289 --> 00:17:39,122 You want to look like me when you hit 50... 179 00:17:40,369 --> 00:17:41,358 ...ish? 180 00:17:42,209 --> 00:17:44,325 I'll be in the gym if you need me. 181 00:17:44,969 --> 00:17:48,166 All right, there was a killing earlier. 177 Spring. 182 00:17:48,329 --> 00:17:49,603 Alien-on-alien. 183 00:17:49,769 --> 00:17:52,158 Take Tee with you and make a report. 184 00:17:53,129 --> 00:17:53,969 Tee. Right. 185 00:17:53,969 --> 00:17:55,249 Tee. Right. 186 00:17:55,249 --> 00:17:55,729 What happened, what happened with Tee... 187 00:17:55,729 --> 00:17:56,209 What happened, what happened with Tee... 188 00:17:56,209 --> 00:17:57,169 What happened, what happened with Tee... 189 00:17:58,129 --> 00:17:58,969 Passports. No rush. How they hanging, Jay? 190 00:17:58,969 --> 00:18:00,561 Passports. No rush. How they hanging, Jay? 191 00:18:00,729 --> 00:18:03,641 You have got to stop neuralyzing MiB personnel. 192 00:18:03,809 --> 00:18:05,925 He was crying in the middle of the diner. 193 00:18:06,089 --> 00:18:07,568 I hate that. 194 00:18:08,169 --> 00:18:10,239 And plus, you can't count Elle. 195 00:18:10,409 --> 00:18:13,242 She wanted to go back to the morgue. I helped her. 196 00:18:13,409 --> 00:18:16,162 - You need a partner. - I'm cool. 197 00:18:16,489 --> 00:18:18,400 I'll be his partner. 198 00:18:19,209 --> 00:18:22,087 Jay, wait up. I appreciate the shot, man. 199 00:18:22,249 --> 00:18:24,365 - Thought I'd never get out. - Lose the suit. 200 00:18:24,529 --> 00:18:26,645 Sure thing. Just going for the look. 201 00:18:26,809 --> 00:18:29,403 But if I say so myself, I find it slimming. 202 00:18:29,569 --> 00:18:32,083 Not that I've had problems with the ladies. 203 00:18:32,249 --> 00:18:33,762 When you get down to... 204 00:18:33,929 --> 00:18:35,601 Nice sled, very swank. 205 00:18:35,769 --> 00:18:37,805 Heated seats? Sometimes I get hives. 206 00:18:58,409 --> 00:18:59,683 Frank! 207 00:19:00,569 --> 00:19:04,005 Bring your head in this window before I roll it up in there. 208 00:19:04,169 --> 00:19:05,443 Got it. 209 00:19:11,209 --> 00:19:12,608 Frank! 210 00:19:13,849 --> 00:19:15,680 My money? It's missionary. 211 00:19:15,849 --> 00:19:18,807 I was in the Bowery, and I meet this Great Dane. 212 00:19:18,969 --> 00:19:21,119 A little thick in the body, but pretty. 213 00:19:21,289 --> 00:19:24,281 That's just not appealing to me, man. Seriously. 214 00:19:24,449 --> 00:19:26,644 I say we do the good cop, bad cop thing. 215 00:19:26,809 --> 00:19:29,277 You interrogate the witness and I growl. 216 00:19:29,449 --> 00:19:33,488 How about we do the good cop, dumb dog thing, and you just shut up? 217 00:19:33,649 --> 00:19:35,924 You got it, partner. Total silence. 218 00:19:36,089 --> 00:19:39,286 Absolute quiet. Not a word out of me. 219 00:19:40,009 --> 00:19:41,522 What do we got? 220 00:19:44,169 --> 00:19:46,888 - What do we got? - There's residue on the wall. 221 00:19:47,049 --> 00:19:51,759 - We sent samples to Em for analysis. - Hey, 0°% ° body fat. 222 00:19:54,409 --> 00:19:56,001 - Funny. - Witness? 223 00:19:56,889 --> 00:19:58,402 Girl. Saw everything. 224 00:19:59,729 --> 00:20:01,048 She's taking it well. 225 00:20:01,209 --> 00:20:05,202 I won't answer any more questions. I want to know what happened here. 226 00:20:05,529 --> 00:20:07,565 - I'll handle this one. - You got it. 227 00:20:07,729 --> 00:20:10,960 Alone. A talking dog might be a bit much for her now. 228 00:20:11,129 --> 00:20:13,120 What do you want me to do? 229 00:20:13,409 --> 00:20:15,365 Sniff around. 230 00:20:15,929 --> 00:20:17,408 What? 231 00:20:17,889 --> 00:20:18,958 Funny. 232 00:20:19,129 --> 00:20:21,484 Take a deep breath. Everything is all right. 233 00:20:21,649 --> 00:20:24,641 What part is she supposed to feel all right about? 234 00:20:27,769 --> 00:20:29,248 I'm Agent Jay. 235 00:20:29,409 --> 00:20:30,842 Tell me what you saw. 236 00:20:31,009 --> 00:20:33,443 - A two-headed guy and a woman. - Caucasian? 237 00:20:33,609 --> 00:20:36,487 Gray, with tentacles that she used to rip... 238 00:20:36,649 --> 00:20:37,638 His skin off. 239 00:20:37,809 --> 00:20:42,883 It's not skin. It's protoplasma polymer similar to the gum in baseball cards. 240 00:20:43,049 --> 00:20:45,517 - What was the last thing you ate? - Calzone. 241 00:20:45,689 --> 00:20:46,758 - What time? - Lunch. 242 00:20:46,929 --> 00:20:49,204 - Spinach? - Mushroom. 243 00:20:50,049 --> 00:20:51,528 You need pie. 244 00:20:52,369 --> 00:20:52,849 They kept asking Ben about a light. 245 00:20:52,849 --> 00:20:53,329 They kept asking Ben about a light. 246 00:20:53,329 --> 00:20:53,809 They kept asking Ben about a light. 247 00:20:53,809 --> 00:20:54,289 They kept asking Ben about a light. 248 00:20:54,289 --> 00:20:54,769 They kept asking Ben about a light. 249 00:20:54,769 --> 00:20:55,729 Light of Zartha, something like that. 250 00:20:55,729 --> 00:20:56,209 Light of Zartha, something like that. 251 00:20:56,209 --> 00:20:56,649 Light of Zartha, something like that. 252 00:20:57,329 --> 00:20:58,808 You okay? 253 00:20:58,969 --> 00:21:02,120 An hour ago, a man I've known my whole life vanished... 254 00:21:02,289 --> 00:21:04,803 ...because of a woman with weird fingers... 255 00:21:04,969 --> 00:21:07,529 ...and a two-headed guy with a cannoli's IQ. 256 00:21:07,689 --> 00:21:10,249 So yeah, everything's okay. 257 00:21:11,769 --> 00:21:15,364 When we're kids, before we're taught how to think... 258 00:21:15,529 --> 00:21:18,726 ...our hearts tell us there is something else out there. 259 00:21:18,889 --> 00:21:23,565 I know what I saw. Tell me what I'm supposed to believe. 260 00:21:28,969 --> 00:21:33,918 I'm a member of a secret organization that monitors alien activity on Earth. 261 00:21:34,089 --> 00:21:36,159 Ben was an alien. So were his killers. 262 00:21:36,329 --> 00:21:40,163 I don't know why they did it, but I promise I'm gonna find out. 263 00:21:41,409 --> 00:21:43,286 Okay. 264 00:21:43,689 --> 00:21:46,078 - Okay? - Okay. 265 00:21:47,449 --> 00:21:48,802 Okay. 266 00:21:53,929 --> 00:21:56,568 - I'm sorry, I'm gonna have to... - Kill me. 267 00:21:56,729 --> 00:21:58,208 No! 268 00:21:58,369 --> 00:22:02,123 Just a little flash and everything goes back the way it was. 269 00:22:02,569 --> 00:22:05,766 After you flash me... 270 00:22:05,929 --> 00:22:08,238 ...if I see you again, will I know it's you? 271 00:22:08,409 --> 00:22:10,365 I'll see you. 272 00:22:12,929 --> 00:22:14,567 But you won't see me. 273 00:22:14,729 --> 00:22:16,720 Must be hard. 274 00:22:16,889 --> 00:22:18,720 Must be very lonely. 275 00:22:33,809 --> 00:22:34,798 Excuse me. 276 00:22:36,089 --> 00:22:38,967 - I gotta go. - What about the flashing thing? 277 00:22:40,089 --> 00:22:42,603 I'll flash you some other time. 278 00:22:59,689 --> 00:23:01,247 What? 279 00:23:05,689 --> 00:23:10,888 - Did you tell the girl you love her? - She's a witness to a crime. That's it. 280 00:23:11,489 --> 00:23:14,959 You're attracted. She's not my species, and I'm attracted. 281 00:23:15,129 --> 00:23:18,917 I should take advice on love from a dude that chases his own ass? 282 00:23:19,089 --> 00:23:22,968 Easy, pal. That's canine profiling, and I resent it. 283 00:23:39,009 --> 00:23:40,283 Hey, Jay, wait up. 284 00:23:40,449 --> 00:23:43,361 Coming through. MiB brass. Look sharp. 285 00:23:43,529 --> 00:23:47,283 I'm Agent Eff, Jay's new partner. Who are you eyeballing? 286 00:23:47,449 --> 00:23:49,599 Frank, just cool out, dog. 287 00:23:51,329 --> 00:23:52,808 - Got kids? - No. 288 00:23:52,969 --> 00:23:54,402 Want them? 289 00:23:57,449 --> 00:23:59,360 Get him off me! 290 00:24:07,369 --> 00:24:09,883 -Talk to me. - It's Kylothian, class C. 291 00:24:10,049 --> 00:24:11,038 Serleena. 292 00:24:11,209 --> 00:24:13,439 -Serleena. Old girlfriend? - She wishes. 293 00:24:13,609 --> 00:24:16,203 The perps were looking for the Light of... 294 00:24:16,369 --> 00:24:17,961 - Zartha. - Yeah, what is it? 295 00:24:18,129 --> 00:24:20,484 This makes no sense. It's not on Earth. 296 00:24:20,649 --> 00:24:23,800 - We took care of this a long time ago. - Obviously not. 297 00:24:23,969 --> 00:24:25,925 That is very bad news. 298 00:24:26,089 --> 00:24:29,604 The Zarthans came to Earth to hide the Light from Serleena. 299 00:24:29,769 --> 00:24:33,125 -We don't do that. - Right. I ordered it off the planet. 300 00:24:33,289 --> 00:24:34,881 Well, Zed... 301 00:24:35,049 --> 00:24:39,281 I got a Kylothian class C in my park. Are you sure this Light isn't here? 302 00:24:39,449 --> 00:24:42,885 Positive. I gave the order. My best agent carried it out. 303 00:24:43,049 --> 00:24:45,517 - It's as if I gave it to you. -Ask the agent. 304 00:24:45,689 --> 00:24:46,724 - Can't. -Dead? 305 00:24:46,889 --> 00:24:49,926 Sort of. He works at the post office. 306 00:24:51,049 --> 00:24:52,164 No. 307 00:24:52,329 --> 00:24:54,889 If Serleena gets to Kay before we do, he's dead. 308 00:24:55,049 --> 00:24:57,927 The Earth's very existence may rest on what Kay knows. 309 00:24:58,089 --> 00:25:00,478 Too bad you wiped out his memory of it. 310 00:25:00,649 --> 00:25:02,082 Bring him in. 311 00:25:02,369 --> 00:25:03,358 Now. 312 00:25:03,529 --> 00:25:07,442 How cool is this? Going to get Kay. The legend, the go-to guy. 313 00:25:07,609 --> 00:25:10,043 Your mentor, who taught you everything. 314 00:25:10,209 --> 00:25:14,646 - The greatest agent in MiB history! - Frank! Stop talking. 315 00:25:18,289 --> 00:25:19,517 Stay. 316 00:25:19,689 --> 00:25:22,203 Listen, partner. I may look like a dog... 317 00:25:22,369 --> 00:25:24,724 ...but I only play one here on Earth. 318 00:25:25,089 --> 00:25:27,444 - Whatever. Wipe your mouth. - Hey, babe. 319 00:25:33,569 --> 00:25:36,720 People of Truro, may I kindly have your attention? 320 00:25:36,889 --> 00:25:39,198 To facilitate your shipping needs... 321 00:25:39,369 --> 00:25:41,929 ...all packages must be properly wrapped. 322 00:25:42,089 --> 00:25:45,798 This one is an example of "go home and do it again." 323 00:25:45,969 --> 00:25:48,642 I think you know what I mean, Mrs. Vigushin. 324 00:25:48,809 --> 00:25:53,485 Brown paper and triple-twist twine are the preferred media. 325 00:25:53,649 --> 00:25:55,321 Thank you for your time. 326 00:25:56,649 --> 00:25:59,243 - Kay. - C. Express mail, two-day air. 327 00:26:01,129 --> 00:26:02,198 Kevin. 328 00:26:03,849 --> 00:26:06,886 Kevin. That's funny. You don't have a " Kevin" ... 329 00:26:09,529 --> 00:26:11,679 You don't remember. We worked together. 330 00:26:11,849 --> 00:26:15,762 I never worked in a funeral home. Something I can do for you, slick? 331 00:26:15,929 --> 00:26:17,487 Straight to the point. 332 00:26:18,209 --> 00:26:22,248 You were an agent of an organization that monitors aliens on Earth. 333 00:26:22,409 --> 00:26:26,322 We're the Men in Black. We have a situation. We need your help. 334 00:26:26,489 --> 00:26:30,084 There is a free mental health clinic on the corner of Lilac. 335 00:26:30,249 --> 00:26:32,126 - Next. - Excuse me. 336 00:26:32,649 --> 00:26:34,560 - Twenty Rugrats stamps. - Elizabeth. 337 00:26:34,729 --> 00:26:38,881 The Postal Service hasn't kept up with today's youth, but we have... 338 00:26:39,049 --> 00:26:41,609 ...Berlin airlift stamps. Opera legends? 339 00:26:41,769 --> 00:26:44,602 American Samoa? Amish quilts. 340 00:26:44,769 --> 00:26:47,363 I'm sorry, got a world to save here. 341 00:26:48,689 --> 00:26:50,645 There was no coma. It was a cover. 342 00:26:50,809 --> 00:26:52,527 - Who are you? - Who are you? 343 00:26:52,689 --> 00:26:56,807 The postmaster of Truro, Massachusetts and I'm ordering you to leave. 344 00:26:59,609 --> 00:27:01,008 - Is that decaf? - Sorry. 345 00:27:01,169 --> 00:27:03,444 We have a breach. Cordon off this area. 346 00:27:03,609 --> 00:27:06,487 Full perimeter wipe-down, right here, right now. 347 00:27:06,649 --> 00:27:10,881 Get a mop and escort all civilian personnel from this site immediately. 348 00:27:11,049 --> 00:27:14,086 Listen to yourself, Kay. Who talks like that? 349 00:28:07,769 --> 00:28:10,522 Why do you think you're so comfortable here? 350 00:28:12,009 --> 00:28:15,684 Just about everybody who works in a post office is an alien. 351 00:28:23,049 --> 00:28:25,005 No smoking. 352 00:28:33,569 --> 00:28:34,638 Kay. 353 00:28:34,929 --> 00:28:38,399 My wife and I saw Siegfried and Roy fly a tiger around a room. 354 00:28:38,569 --> 00:28:40,002 You're nothing special. 355 00:28:40,169 --> 00:28:42,967 When you look at the stars, you get a feeling... 356 00:28:43,129 --> 00:28:45,040 ...like you don't know who you are. 357 00:28:45,209 --> 00:28:48,679 Like you know more about out there than you do down here. 358 00:28:48,849 --> 00:28:53,286 That's why she left you, Kay. That's why your wife left you. 359 00:28:55,209 --> 00:28:56,961 Okay, I'll tell you what. 360 00:28:57,129 --> 00:29:00,838 You want to know who you really are, take a ride with me. 361 00:29:01,009 --> 00:29:04,718 If not, people are waiting for their TV Guides. 362 00:29:07,769 --> 00:29:09,202 Think he'll bite? 363 00:29:14,889 --> 00:29:18,438 I'm just going for a ride. If things don't add up, it's hasta luego. 364 00:29:18,609 --> 00:29:20,122 Hey, Kay. 365 00:29:21,409 --> 00:29:23,559 How's it hanging? 366 00:29:37,289 --> 00:29:39,041 Good to see you, Kay. 367 00:29:39,209 --> 00:29:42,167 Good to see you too, whoever you are. 368 00:29:43,489 --> 00:29:47,528 Well, let's see what you got here, chief. 369 00:29:57,529 --> 00:29:59,724 Welcome back, Agent Kay. 370 00:30:00,929 --> 00:30:02,157 Agent Kay. 371 00:30:02,729 --> 00:30:04,799 Greetings, Kay. 372 00:30:06,849 --> 00:30:08,123 Wow, look who's back. 373 00:30:08,289 --> 00:30:10,723 I don't mean to bother you... You're Agent Kay! 374 00:30:10,889 --> 00:30:13,926 - That's what they tell me. - This is an honour. Agent Gee. 375 00:30:14,089 --> 00:30:16,478 The most respected agent in MiB history. 376 00:30:16,649 --> 00:30:19,038 The most feared human in the universe. 377 00:30:19,209 --> 00:30:22,042 Maybe I could buy you a cup of coffee? 378 00:30:22,209 --> 00:30:24,769 - Black, two sugars, if you're going. - An honor. 379 00:30:24,929 --> 00:30:28,160 - Yeah, I'll take a... My man? - Good to see you, Kay. 380 00:30:29,769 --> 00:30:31,088 How'd it go? 381 00:30:31,249 --> 00:30:33,604 The Drolacks are gone and the treaty is signed. 382 00:30:33,769 --> 00:30:34,758 Good work. 383 00:30:34,929 --> 00:30:38,080 What about that position you promised me in Men in Black? 384 00:30:38,249 --> 00:30:41,559 Still working on the alien affirmative action program. 385 00:30:41,729 --> 00:30:43,879 That's not what you promised me. 386 00:30:44,049 --> 00:30:46,085 - You're breaking up. -Zed? Hello? 387 00:30:46,249 --> 00:30:49,685 - I'll call you back. -I could be Agent Em. Zed, you... 388 00:30:50,409 --> 00:30:54,960 I think Earth might be in a bad way. You're the only one that could save it. 389 00:30:55,129 --> 00:30:58,087 - Well, neither rain, sleet, snow... - Good man. 390 00:30:58,249 --> 00:31:02,003 Get him armed and up to speed and over to deneuralyzation. 391 00:31:03,129 --> 00:31:04,198 - Frank? - Yeah? 392 00:31:04,409 --> 00:31:07,207 I'm gonna need them together on this one. 393 00:31:07,689 --> 00:31:11,204 I need an assistant. It's not field work, but you get dental. 394 00:31:11,369 --> 00:31:12,802 Dental? 395 00:31:15,209 --> 00:31:17,089 The most advanced technologies from all over the universe are in this room. 396 00:31:17,089 --> 00:31:18,249 The most advanced technologies from all over the universe are in this room. 397 00:31:18,249 --> 00:31:19,209 The most advanced technologies from all over the universe are in this room. 398 00:31:19,689 --> 00:31:20,169 What's this? 399 00:31:20,169 --> 00:31:21,129 What's this? 400 00:31:22,089 --> 00:31:24,842 All is lost! All is lost! 401 00:31:25,889 --> 00:31:27,368 Don't touch that! 402 00:31:28,289 --> 00:31:30,086 I didn't do anything. 403 00:31:30,249 --> 00:31:33,286 Hands in your pockets. 404 00:31:42,329 --> 00:31:44,399 Your favourite weapon. 405 00:31:47,049 --> 00:31:49,244 - That? - Yep. 406 00:31:49,729 --> 00:31:51,720 - Let's go put it on. - What? 407 00:31:51,889 --> 00:31:54,119 The last suit you'll ever wear. 408 00:31:54,289 --> 00:31:55,802 Again. 409 00:32:02,609 --> 00:32:03,883 The deneuralyzer. 410 00:32:05,409 --> 00:32:08,321 Magneto-energy will surge through your brain... 411 00:32:08,489 --> 00:32:12,926 ...unlocking information that could hold the key to Earth's very survival. 412 00:32:13,089 --> 00:32:15,649 Okay. What's that thing? 413 00:32:16,969 --> 00:32:18,880 The deneuralyzer. 414 00:32:26,049 --> 00:32:29,928 Welcome to planet Earth. There are some rules and regulations. 415 00:32:30,089 --> 00:32:31,408 Go out only at night. 416 00:32:31,569 --> 00:32:35,642 If you must go out during the daylight, only the East Village. 417 00:32:39,889 --> 00:32:41,607 Hey, hey, hey, hey! 418 00:32:45,449 --> 00:32:48,202 Name and planet of origin? 419 00:32:48,369 --> 00:32:51,964 Sylona Gorth. Planet Jorn. Kaluth system. 420 00:32:52,929 --> 00:32:56,763 - Any fruits or vegetables? - Yeah, two heads of cabbage. 421 00:32:56,929 --> 00:32:57,918 Reason for visit? 422 00:32:58,089 --> 00:33:01,445 Education. I want to learn how to be an underwear model. 423 00:33:01,609 --> 00:33:04,248 They told me I've got real potential. 424 00:33:06,689 --> 00:33:08,407 Help! Heart attack! 425 00:33:09,609 --> 00:33:10,962 Clear! 426 00:33:12,169 --> 00:33:14,080 Wake up, champ! 427 00:33:19,089 --> 00:33:22,445 - Oh, jeez. -Lockdown. Code 101. 428 00:33:23,369 --> 00:33:25,200 Lockdown. 429 00:33:26,089 --> 00:33:28,603 This is not good. This is not good. 430 00:33:35,009 --> 00:33:37,887 - Breach! We're being flushed. - Flushed? 431 00:33:38,409 --> 00:33:41,446 - Ever been to a water park? - I don't know. 432 00:34:13,889 --> 00:34:15,163 Flushed. 433 00:34:16,569 --> 00:34:20,528 Yeah, man, back when you was an agent, you loved getting flushed. 434 00:34:20,689 --> 00:34:25,126 Yeah, every Saturday night, you'd be like, " Flush me, Jay. Flush me." 435 00:34:25,289 --> 00:34:26,927 I'd be like, " No." 436 00:34:28,489 --> 00:34:29,922 You can't quit on me. 437 00:34:30,089 --> 00:34:32,887 I save the world, you tell me why I stare at the stars. 438 00:34:33,049 --> 00:34:34,562 Cool. 439 00:34:36,969 --> 00:34:37,449 - Hop in. - Hop in what? 440 00:34:37,449 --> 00:34:38,409 - Hop in. - Hop in what? 441 00:34:44,289 --> 00:34:45,768 Does that come standard? 442 00:34:45,929 --> 00:34:49,888 It came with a black dude, but he kept getting pulled over. 443 00:34:52,289 --> 00:34:56,965 I could rule this place with the right set of mammary glands. 444 00:34:57,329 --> 00:34:58,842 Trapped like rats... 445 00:34:59,529 --> 00:35:00,564 ...in a Chia Pet. 446 00:35:00,729 --> 00:35:03,197 Computer, surveillance MiB. 447 00:35:07,809 --> 00:35:09,561 MiB's locked down. 448 00:35:11,569 --> 00:35:15,039 Computer, magnify. Times 10. 449 00:35:16,129 --> 00:35:17,926 Communicator. Frank. 450 00:35:18,209 --> 00:35:20,439 - Jay, where are you? -We got flushed. 451 00:35:20,609 --> 00:35:22,679 - MiB 's code 101. - Yeah, who did it? 452 00:35:22,849 --> 00:35:25,682 Some hot-looking biker chick. Want me to tail her? 453 00:35:25,849 --> 00:35:30,525 - Stay where you are. I'll be in touch. - Stay where I am. Easy for you to say. 454 00:35:30,689 --> 00:35:32,008 - Find Kay? - Neuralyzed. 455 00:35:32,169 --> 00:35:34,683 - Not active. Civilian. - What? 456 00:35:34,849 --> 00:35:35,838 - He was... - Here. 457 00:35:36,009 --> 00:35:37,283 - To get... - Deneuralyzed. 458 00:35:37,449 --> 00:35:41,806 - Memory's shot. But we'll find him. - Don't put anything in our ears. 459 00:35:42,689 --> 00:35:43,678 What? 460 00:35:43,849 --> 00:35:47,205 What do you make of that? Found it in my pocket. Weird, huh? 461 00:35:47,369 --> 00:35:49,963 - Yeah, a smile. - Is that the only deneuralyzer? 462 00:35:50,129 --> 00:35:52,962 Officially. The plans leaked out on the Internet. 463 00:35:53,129 --> 00:35:55,040 Computer, Internet. 464 00:35:55,209 --> 00:35:56,961 Deneuralyzer. 465 00:36:00,849 --> 00:36:02,726 Perfect. It's an old friend. 466 00:36:10,209 --> 00:36:12,165 Jay, ain't seen you in a while. 467 00:36:12,329 --> 00:36:14,923 Did you peep that drop-top thing out front? 468 00:36:15,089 --> 00:36:17,125 My business is banging, dog. 469 00:36:17,609 --> 00:36:20,840 You gotta check out the website. It's Jeebsie dot... 470 00:36:21,089 --> 00:36:23,045 Okay, whoa. He's retired, right? 471 00:36:23,449 --> 00:36:25,121 We need the deneuralyzer. 472 00:36:25,289 --> 00:36:28,486 - You're kidding. - The metre's running, Jeebs. 473 00:36:30,809 --> 00:36:32,959 Do you remember me? 474 00:36:33,449 --> 00:36:35,485 Can't say I do. I'm good with faces. 475 00:36:36,049 --> 00:36:37,687 I think I'd remember that. 476 00:36:38,849 --> 00:36:40,805 The great Kay's a neutral. 477 00:36:40,969 --> 00:36:45,121 You're between me and my memories. Do you have this deneuralyzer or not? 478 00:36:45,289 --> 00:36:46,563 No. 479 00:36:47,649 --> 00:36:49,082 Fresh out. 480 00:36:50,249 --> 00:36:51,841 Can't help you. 481 00:36:53,849 --> 00:36:55,328 Don't got it. 482 00:37:03,649 --> 00:37:07,358 Even if I did, if it doesn't work, he dies, you blow my head off. 483 00:37:07,529 --> 00:37:11,408 If it does, I've brought back Kay, who, for fun, blows my head off. 484 00:37:11,569 --> 00:37:13,400 So, what's my incentive? 485 00:37:13,769 --> 00:37:17,728 Okay, homey, I keep it downstairs next to the snow blowers. 486 00:37:21,089 --> 00:37:24,161 Alien prisoners released, armed and ready for your orders. 487 00:37:24,329 --> 00:37:27,639 Prisoners of MiB, the scum of the universe. 488 00:37:28,049 --> 00:37:29,607 Now it's the scum's turn. 489 00:37:29,769 --> 00:37:32,078 I'm in a jam, so I'll make this simple. 490 00:37:32,489 --> 00:37:35,799 I need the Light of Zartha, and Kay knows where it is. 491 00:37:35,969 --> 00:37:38,199 Whoever brings Kay to me gets Earth. 492 00:37:38,369 --> 00:37:41,520 Find a deneuralyzer. They want his memory back. 493 00:37:41,689 --> 00:37:43,441 Check. 494 00:37:44,089 --> 00:37:45,568 Now. 495 00:37:48,809 --> 00:37:50,720 Jarra, good to see you. 496 00:37:54,529 --> 00:37:56,326 Okay, that should do it. 497 00:37:56,489 --> 00:38:00,687 If I could have your attention while we go over the safety procedures. 498 00:38:00,849 --> 00:38:03,283 Keep your hands inside the vehicle. 499 00:38:03,449 --> 00:38:06,407 lf, during the ride, you become disoriented... 500 00:38:06,569 --> 00:38:09,129 ...there's nothing we can do about it. 501 00:38:10,569 --> 00:38:12,878 Have you removed all your jewellry? 502 00:38:14,409 --> 00:38:16,718 - Are you allergic to shellfish? - Jeebs! 503 00:38:16,889 --> 00:38:19,562 Right, then! Smoke 'em if you got 'em. 504 00:38:25,849 --> 00:38:27,202 Have you used this? 505 00:38:27,409 --> 00:38:31,038 I used it to make some hot-air popcorn. That's about it. 506 00:38:31,209 --> 00:38:34,007 Okay! Let's make it happen, cap'n! 507 00:39:26,929 --> 00:39:28,328 Perfect. 508 00:39:41,449 --> 00:39:43,405 - You're back. - No. 509 00:39:43,569 --> 00:39:46,641 - How'd you know his head grows back? - It grows back? 510 00:39:49,049 --> 00:39:52,803 Real nice. Okay, that's the last time I help out a friend. 511 00:39:55,169 --> 00:39:57,558 - Kay, you remember anything? - Goodbye. 512 00:39:57,729 --> 00:39:59,208 - Kay! - Kay, wait! 513 00:40:00,009 --> 00:40:03,399 I never got the updated software. Still working off the 6.0. 514 00:40:03,569 --> 00:40:05,446 Your brain needs to reboot. 515 00:40:06,609 --> 00:40:07,883 Give it a minute. 516 00:40:08,049 --> 00:40:09,402 Kay! 517 00:40:09,649 --> 00:40:12,649 Bottom of my heart, I'm really sorry. I hope it won't affect our friendship. 518 00:40:12,649 --> 00:40:14,719 Bottom of my heart, I'm really sorry. I hope it won't affect our friendship. 519 00:40:14,889 --> 00:40:19,201 All those years of loyalty and trust, respect for one another. 520 00:40:21,569 --> 00:40:22,797 Right over there! 521 00:40:24,289 --> 00:40:26,644 - Where's Kay? - He's not here! He went... 522 00:40:26,849 --> 00:40:30,046 Kay's retired. I'm his trigger-happy replacement. 523 00:40:30,209 --> 00:40:33,599 Right in the pie hole. Now nothing's gonna taste right. 524 00:40:33,769 --> 00:40:36,158 - Lower your weapon. - No. 525 00:40:41,449 --> 00:40:43,838 Jay, how are you, boo-boo? 526 00:40:44,009 --> 00:40:46,569 - These guys really need Kay. - He's a neutral. 527 00:40:46,729 --> 00:40:50,244 - Tell me something we don't know. - Yeah, tell me something... 528 00:40:50,409 --> 00:40:51,967 I am so sorry. 529 00:40:52,129 --> 00:40:54,040 - God bless you. - Thank you. 530 00:40:55,249 --> 00:40:59,128 If I don't bring Kay back to MiB, Serleena's gonna kick my ass. 531 00:40:59,289 --> 00:41:01,280 - Now, where is he? - Where is who? 532 00:41:01,449 --> 00:41:03,883 You don't look too good. 533 00:41:04,609 --> 00:41:06,406 Yeah, and you look like crap. 534 00:41:09,089 --> 00:41:11,842 I take that back. He look like crap. 535 00:41:14,329 --> 00:41:16,160 - Bend him! - Bend him. 536 00:41:16,329 --> 00:41:18,081 Wait, don't bend him. 537 00:41:54,329 --> 00:41:56,047 Damn decent of you. 538 00:41:56,609 --> 00:41:57,837 Don't mention it. 539 00:42:17,849 --> 00:42:20,522 - I'm gonna be sick. - You don't wanna do that. 540 00:42:20,689 --> 00:42:24,568 - Fellas, I think he's telling the truth. - Then he's no good to us. 541 00:42:26,809 --> 00:42:29,687 - Didn't I teach you anything, kid? - Pineal eye! 542 00:42:32,169 --> 00:42:33,761 Go for the mosh tendrils! 543 00:42:37,929 --> 00:42:38,409 Kay, he's a ball-chinnian. 544 00:42:38,409 --> 00:42:38,889 Kay, he's a ball-chinnian. 545 00:42:38,889 --> 00:42:39,849 Kay, he's a ball-chinnian. 546 00:42:43,849 --> 00:42:46,238 - You were in a tight spot. - I handled it. 547 00:42:46,409 --> 00:42:49,128 - You need a partner. - I had one. Job got too tough. 548 00:42:49,289 --> 00:42:51,519 I'm back. You got some dust on your coat. 549 00:42:51,689 --> 00:42:53,441 So you got your memory back. 550 00:42:53,609 --> 00:42:55,998 - What the hell is going on? - Don't know. 551 00:42:56,169 --> 00:42:58,524 - The Light of Zartha? - Never heard of it. 552 00:42:58,689 --> 00:42:59,678 Cool. 553 00:43:02,889 --> 00:43:05,119 You don't remember the Light of Zartha? 554 00:43:05,289 --> 00:43:07,849 Must've neuralyzed myself to keep it from myself. 555 00:43:08,009 --> 00:43:11,160 - Good plan. What you doing? - I do the driving. 556 00:43:11,329 --> 00:43:13,240 - Wait, no. Whoa. - I remember that. 557 00:43:13,409 --> 00:43:17,163 What you remember is you used to drive that old, busted jawn. 558 00:43:17,329 --> 00:43:20,287 I drive the new hotness. 559 00:43:20,449 --> 00:43:23,919 Old and busted, new hotness. 560 00:43:32,489 --> 00:43:34,525 Old busted hotness. 561 00:43:34,889 --> 00:43:37,449 - Serleena, please. - Been a long time, Zed. 562 00:43:37,609 --> 00:43:41,124 I'm just touched you remembered me. Makes me fuzzy all over. 563 00:43:41,289 --> 00:43:44,486 Never forget a pretty whatever you are. 564 00:43:46,609 --> 00:43:48,247 Zed? 565 00:43:48,609 --> 00:43:50,201 Zed? Look at you. 566 00:43:50,369 --> 00:43:53,247 Twenty-five years, and you're still such a looker. 567 00:43:53,409 --> 00:43:55,047 Cut out the meat and dairy. 568 00:43:55,209 --> 00:43:58,884 And you, still a pile of squirmy crap in a different wrapper. 569 00:43:59,209 --> 00:44:02,724 So feisty. Look, we both need the same thing. 570 00:44:05,489 --> 00:44:06,968 Bring him in. 571 00:44:07,609 --> 00:44:08,644 Don't think so. 572 00:44:08,809 --> 00:44:12,643 What about the Light's secret? If it's not off Earth by midnight... 573 00:44:12,809 --> 00:44:16,085 ...it self-destructs, annihilating your little planet. 574 00:44:16,249 --> 00:44:19,958 I lose, you lose. I win, everything keeps spinning. 575 00:44:20,329 --> 00:44:24,163 You don't want the Light on Earth any more than I do. 576 00:44:26,649 --> 00:44:28,287 All right, Serleena. 577 00:44:29,489 --> 00:44:31,286 You win. 578 00:44:32,809 --> 00:44:36,006 Zed? Is that you? I could be Agent Em. 579 00:44:36,369 --> 00:44:37,768 Zed. Hello? 580 00:44:47,849 --> 00:44:49,805 So feisty. 581 00:44:54,089 --> 00:44:57,604 Fastest way back to MiB, you take this right on 39th. 582 00:44:57,769 --> 00:44:59,282 Right here. Right. 583 00:45:01,369 --> 00:45:03,041 Next right on 37th. 584 00:45:03,209 --> 00:45:05,598 Right here. Right! 585 00:45:05,929 --> 00:45:07,408 We're not going back. 586 00:45:07,569 --> 00:45:12,438 Headquarters has been breached, man. We need to peel caps and split wigs. 587 00:45:12,609 --> 00:45:14,167 Not ready. 588 00:45:14,569 --> 00:45:17,925 Look, you've been out for five years. That's a long time. 589 00:45:18,089 --> 00:45:21,047 I understand you're scared. I'm a little scared too. 590 00:45:21,209 --> 00:45:23,200 - I'm not scared. - Me neither. 591 00:45:23,729 --> 00:45:26,038 I just thought we was bonding. 592 00:45:26,849 --> 00:45:30,762 You're acting like a rookie. Splitting wigs and stepping on caps. 593 00:45:30,929 --> 00:45:34,888 - No wonder Zed brought me back. - He did it because you messed up. 594 00:45:35,049 --> 00:45:37,609 Your attitude makes for a stressful environment. 595 00:45:37,769 --> 00:45:41,682 Tell it to the hand. Stressful is what we got back at MiB. 596 00:45:41,849 --> 00:45:46,240 Exactly. Serleena broke into MiB in order to lure me back. 597 00:45:46,409 --> 00:45:48,400 Into a trap. 598 00:45:48,569 --> 00:45:51,037 Which is why we can't bust in there, man. 599 00:45:51,209 --> 00:45:54,087 We need a plan. Where we going? Scene of the crime? 600 00:45:54,249 --> 00:45:58,242 - You're the boss. - Scene of the crime. That's a left. 601 00:46:00,649 --> 00:46:03,004 I'll contact the witness. We'll talk to her. 602 00:46:03,169 --> 00:46:06,286 Things have changed. We used to neuralyze witnesses. 603 00:46:07,569 --> 00:46:09,241 See, originally, I'd... 604 00:46:10,209 --> 00:46:14,521 No, I was going to... I interrogated her. 605 00:46:14,689 --> 00:46:15,529 - And neuralyzed her. - What? 606 00:46:15,529 --> 00:46:16,279 - And neuralyzed her. - What? 607 00:46:16,449 --> 00:46:21,603 MiB code 773II- 1 clearly states that all civilian personnel... 608 00:46:22,569 --> 00:46:24,002 - Drop that weapon! - No! 609 00:46:24,169 --> 00:46:25,727 Jay, I'm... I'm sorry. 610 00:46:25,889 --> 00:46:28,687 No, no, I'm fine. It's my fault. 611 00:46:29,009 --> 00:46:31,364 Kay, my partner. Laura, the witness. 612 00:46:31,529 --> 00:46:32,644 Pleasure. 613 00:46:33,849 --> 00:46:38,240 Thanks for sending those agents over to keep an eye on me last night. 614 00:46:38,409 --> 00:46:40,320 MiB procedural code 594-B... 615 00:46:40,489 --> 00:46:43,526 ...states that MiB personnel shall never be used... 616 00:46:43,689 --> 00:46:48,809 Ben, the Zarthan, was vaporized here. I assume the perp was over here. 617 00:46:48,969 --> 00:46:50,482 Ben. 618 00:46:50,649 --> 00:46:53,368 - Was he 5'7", thinning hair? - You knew him? 619 00:46:53,769 --> 00:46:55,919 Nope. Never seen him before in my life. 620 00:46:56,089 --> 00:46:58,887 That is a hell of a fish. 621 00:47:00,969 --> 00:47:02,721 Wait a minute. 622 00:47:07,649 --> 00:47:08,968 You left yourself clues? 623 00:47:09,129 --> 00:47:13,042 In case I was deneuralyzed because my replacement couldn't handle it. 624 00:47:13,209 --> 00:47:17,680 If the joker that had got deneuralyzed hadn't created the situation... 625 00:47:17,849 --> 00:47:19,123 Boys. 626 00:47:20,969 --> 00:47:23,722 All right. You pointing at something. 627 00:47:27,729 --> 00:47:29,048 Excuse me. 628 00:47:30,529 --> 00:47:32,042 The astronaut. 629 00:47:33,609 --> 00:47:34,724 Jay? 630 00:47:35,169 --> 00:47:37,364 Okay, all right. He's pointing... 631 00:47:37,529 --> 00:47:39,406 He's like... 632 00:47:42,089 --> 00:47:43,807 Who would stack boxes like this? 633 00:47:43,969 --> 00:47:47,644 A box stacker who's not stacking boxes. He's leaving clues. 634 00:47:47,809 --> 00:47:49,242 It's an arrow. 635 00:47:53,209 --> 00:47:55,359 - Jay? - You're slowing me down, slick. 636 00:47:55,529 --> 00:47:59,044 Whatever we're looking for is in these cabinets, right here. 637 00:48:00,369 --> 00:48:03,327 Anchovy filets in virgin olive oil. 638 00:48:06,729 --> 00:48:08,959 I hope I'm not slowing you down. 639 00:48:09,569 --> 00:48:12,083 Good work, partner. Yeah. 640 00:48:12,249 --> 00:48:15,047 - We gotta figure out where it goes. - I know where. 641 00:48:15,369 --> 00:48:19,328 - No. Not yet. - MiB code 773 clearly says... 642 00:48:19,489 --> 00:48:22,561 I know the code, but she might be important to me. 643 00:48:23,129 --> 00:48:25,518 To us. Well, for help. To help us later. 644 00:48:26,169 --> 00:48:28,763 Well, she can't stay here. They'll be back. 645 00:48:31,369 --> 00:48:34,998 - You can stay with friends of mine. - People like you? 646 00:48:35,169 --> 00:48:36,158 Kind of. 647 00:48:36,329 --> 00:48:37,808 Jay! 648 00:48:37,969 --> 00:48:40,358 - Low bridge! - What's going on, man? 649 00:48:40,529 --> 00:48:43,680 Hey, what's happening, fellas? MiB is code 101. 650 00:48:44,249 --> 00:48:45,568 - Bad. - Very bad. 651 00:48:45,729 --> 00:48:49,608 - I need your help. This is Laura. - Laura! 652 00:48:49,769 --> 00:48:51,327 Easy, easy! 653 00:48:51,489 --> 00:48:52,478 They're worms. 654 00:48:52,649 --> 00:48:55,846 Once you go worm, that's what you'll yearn. 655 00:48:56,009 --> 00:48:59,206 - That's what they say. They just: - I've dated worse. 656 00:48:59,689 --> 00:49:02,203 They're suspended for stealing from duty-free. 657 00:49:02,369 --> 00:49:05,042 - We were framed. - Zed's wormophobic. 658 00:49:05,209 --> 00:49:06,437 - Kay! - You're back! 659 00:49:06,609 --> 00:49:09,248 - They said you were dead. - We're double-parked. 660 00:49:09,409 --> 00:49:11,206 Laura's very important to me. 661 00:49:11,889 --> 00:49:15,359 To us. To the stuff... Me and you, the stuff we're doing. 662 00:49:16,449 --> 00:49:19,282 - Keep an eye on her. - I'll keep both on her. 663 00:49:19,449 --> 00:49:20,438 No problem! 664 00:49:22,569 --> 00:49:25,242 - Why don't you sit here? - Like you got a shot. 665 00:49:25,409 --> 00:49:26,524 Hey, shut up! 666 00:49:29,569 --> 00:49:32,163 My communicator, in case you need it. 667 00:49:35,649 --> 00:49:37,207 - Nice move. - Okay. 668 00:49:39,729 --> 00:49:43,358 - Just watch out for Neeble. - Which one's Neeble? 669 00:49:45,729 --> 00:49:47,845 - Which one of y'all is Neeble? - Yo, mama! 670 00:49:48,009 --> 00:49:52,048 Him, right there. It's fine. Everything's straight. It's safe. 671 00:49:52,209 --> 00:49:54,120 Don't fall asleep. 672 00:49:55,809 --> 00:49:57,401 Twister! 673 00:49:59,329 --> 00:50:03,800 Run over your plan one more time. I'm struggling with it. 674 00:50:03,969 --> 00:50:07,644 You neuralyzed memory of the Light but left yourself clues. 675 00:50:07,809 --> 00:50:08,798 Right. 676 00:50:08,969 --> 00:50:13,838 Photo pointing to a key in a pizzeria which opens a locker at Grand Central. 677 00:50:14,009 --> 00:50:17,922 - In the locker, we'll find another clue. - That's the plan. 678 00:50:20,249 --> 00:50:23,685 - I like to keep my enemies confused. - We're all confused. 679 00:50:25,889 --> 00:50:30,041 - Are you gonna slow me down? - Your brain's working on old software. 680 00:50:30,209 --> 00:50:32,325 Why don't you go grab us some coffee? 681 00:50:32,489 --> 00:50:35,845 Sure. How do you take it? Black? Couple cubes of kiss my ass? 682 00:50:36,009 --> 00:50:39,285 I don't know what's in there, so step back. 683 00:50:39,449 --> 00:50:42,759 Kay, for real, man. Open the damn locker. 684 00:50:47,169 --> 00:50:49,444 Kay! He's back! The light giver! 685 00:50:49,609 --> 00:50:51,998 All hail Kay! All hail Kay! 686 00:50:52,369 --> 00:50:56,078 Oh, Kay, can you see By the dawn's early light 687 00:50:56,249 --> 00:50:58,968 You are the man who would be king of the train locker. 688 00:50:59,129 --> 00:51:00,118 Praise Kay! 689 00:51:00,289 --> 00:51:04,885 Oh, good and gentle townsfolk of Locker C-18... 690 00:51:05,049 --> 00:51:08,485 ...did I leave anything here? - Yes. The timekeeper. 691 00:51:08,649 --> 00:51:11,209 Left to illuminate our streets and hearts. 692 00:51:11,369 --> 00:51:15,647 - I've been looking everywhere for this. - Merciful one! The clock tower! 693 00:51:15,809 --> 00:51:18,403 I got y'all, it's cool. Check this out. 694 00:51:18,689 --> 00:51:21,681 Titanium case. Waterproof to over 300 metres. 695 00:51:22,409 --> 00:51:24,877 - That's banging. - Who are you, stranger? 696 00:51:25,289 --> 00:51:26,847 Jay. 697 00:51:27,249 --> 00:51:29,365 All hail Jay! All hail Jay! 698 00:51:29,769 --> 00:51:31,725 Oh, Jay, can you see 699 00:51:31,889 --> 00:51:34,847 - Oh, merciful Jay, the keeper of... - Come on. 700 00:51:35,369 --> 00:51:37,439 - Wait! The commandments! - The tablet! 701 00:51:37,609 --> 00:51:40,487 The tablet! The tablet! The tablet! The tablet! 702 00:51:40,649 --> 00:51:44,528 We have lived by its word, and peace has reigned throughout our world. 703 00:51:44,689 --> 00:51:47,965 Pass it on to others! So that they too may be enlightened! 704 00:51:48,129 --> 00:51:49,721 Be kind! Rewind! 705 00:51:49,889 --> 00:51:51,641 Reconcile your past... 706 00:51:52,049 --> 00:51:54,358 ...in order to move into your future! 707 00:51:54,529 --> 00:51:56,804 Two for one every Wednesday. 708 00:51:56,969 --> 00:52:00,166 Give twice as much as ye receive on our most sacred of days. 709 00:52:00,449 --> 00:52:01,438 Every Wednesday. 710 00:52:01,609 --> 00:52:05,284 Large adult entertainment section in the back. 711 00:52:08,529 --> 00:52:10,042 That's just nasty. 712 00:52:10,849 --> 00:52:12,999 - What's with the video card? - Don't know. 713 00:52:13,169 --> 00:52:14,602 - The watch? - A reminder. 714 00:52:14,769 --> 00:52:16,088 - Of what? - Can't remember. 715 00:52:16,249 --> 00:52:17,238 Guess. 716 00:52:17,409 --> 00:52:21,004 I guess we have till midnight. 59 minutes to figure it out. 717 00:52:23,329 --> 00:52:27,288 Look. Here's an idea. Let's stop chasing butt-backwards clues... 718 00:52:27,449 --> 00:52:31,442 ...get a couple fission carbonisers and get our headquarters back. 719 00:52:31,609 --> 00:52:33,679 It's all about to make sense, kid. 720 00:52:33,849 --> 00:52:35,521 Is this card valid? 721 00:52:37,129 --> 00:52:40,804 - This card hasn't been used in years. - I've been away on business. 722 00:52:40,969 --> 00:52:43,199 - Billions of frequent flier miles. - Try and use them. 723 00:52:43,369 --> 00:52:47,203 I wanted to go to Cambodia. You can get a lobster dinner for a dollar. 724 00:52:47,569 --> 00:52:52,689 The airlines black out holidays. It's a conspiracy, I'm sure, I mean... 725 00:52:52,849 --> 00:52:55,443 Can you tell us anything about the account? 726 00:52:55,849 --> 00:52:57,680 You never checked out a tape. 727 00:52:57,849 --> 00:53:01,046 You reserved one once, but you never picked it up. 728 00:53:01,569 --> 00:53:03,878 - Newton. - There's a rat in the toilet. 729 00:53:04,049 --> 00:53:08,167 It's all stopped up. You're gonna have to pee in the sin... 730 00:53:11,209 --> 00:53:14,087 - Still think I'm paranoid? - Yeah. 731 00:53:14,809 --> 00:53:20,042 Gentlemen, my name is Newton. I run the place. Seen any aliens lately? 732 00:53:20,209 --> 00:53:24,282 - You need professional help. - He's getting it. It's not working. 733 00:53:24,449 --> 00:53:26,565 Okay, so, new case, huh? 734 00:53:26,729 --> 00:53:29,084 Episode 27, Light of Zartha. 735 00:53:30,569 --> 00:53:31,797 Got it. 736 00:53:32,409 --> 00:53:36,004 Jarra, it's a sin they've kept a genius like you locked away. 737 00:53:36,169 --> 00:53:40,003 Their agent Jay caught me siphoning ozone to sell on the black market. 738 00:53:40,169 --> 00:53:42,000 They're touchy about global warming. 739 00:53:42,169 --> 00:53:45,605 I need a spacecraft that can travel 300 times the speed of light. 740 00:53:45,769 --> 00:53:47,646 I'll give you whatever you want. 741 00:53:47,809 --> 00:53:50,243 - Give me Jay. We'll call it even. - Groovy. 742 00:53:50,969 --> 00:53:53,324 You've got till midnight. 743 00:53:57,329 --> 00:54:00,799 Gatbot, I got a little something special for you. 744 00:54:05,089 --> 00:54:07,762 Newton? Newton, is that you? 745 00:54:07,929 --> 00:54:10,318 Yes, Mom, I'm up here with some friends. 746 00:54:10,489 --> 00:54:12,002 I wanna have your baby. 747 00:54:12,169 --> 00:54:14,205 Would you like some mini-pizza? 748 00:54:15,089 --> 00:54:18,081 You guys want some mini-pizzas? They're good. 749 00:54:18,249 --> 00:54:21,286 They're like mini-bagels, with pizza stuff on them. 750 00:54:21,449 --> 00:54:24,168 She'll put a little fontina cheese on. 751 00:54:24,329 --> 00:54:28,117 She has palsy, so she ends up putting a lot of cheese on. 752 00:54:32,569 --> 00:54:34,605 No, thanks, we're cool. 753 00:54:34,769 --> 00:54:35,997 All right. 754 00:54:37,649 --> 00:54:38,968 Over here. 755 00:54:43,449 --> 00:54:44,723 This is it. 756 00:54:45,009 --> 00:54:47,204 Finally some hard evidence. 757 00:54:47,449 --> 00:54:50,998 Gentlemen, before I play the tape, one question: 758 00:54:51,569 --> 00:54:53,287 What's up with anal probing? 759 00:54:53,449 --> 00:54:57,158 Aliens travel billions of light years just to check out our... 760 00:54:57,329 --> 00:54:59,524 Boy, move. 761 00:54:59,689 --> 00:55:02,442 Okay. Just a question. 762 00:55:03,449 --> 00:55:06,885 Here is one of their stories that "never happened"... 763 00:55:07,049 --> 00:55:10,724 ... from one of their files that doesn't exist. 764 00:55:12,089 --> 00:55:16,879 1978. Devastating war of Zartha had raged on for 50 years. 765 00:55:17,049 --> 00:55:18,721 Looks like Spielberg's work. 766 00:55:18,889 --> 00:55:22,643 But the Zarthans had a great treasure, the Light of Zartha. 767 00:55:22,809 --> 00:55:26,040 A source of power so awesome, it alone... 768 00:55:26,209 --> 00:55:29,645 ... could mean victory and restoration for the Zarthans... 769 00:55:29,809 --> 00:55:34,087 ... or complete annihilation, if it fell into the hands of the Kylothians. 770 00:55:34,249 --> 00:55:38,162 A group of Zarthans made the journey, led by the Keeper of the Light... 771 00:55:38,329 --> 00:55:39,728 Lauranna. 772 00:55:40,169 --> 00:55:42,160 ... Princess Lauranna. 773 00:55:42,449 --> 00:55:46,840 Lauranna beseeched the Men in Black to help her hide the Light on Earth. 774 00:55:47,009 --> 00:55:49,284 But they could not intervene. 775 00:55:49,449 --> 00:55:50,598 No. 776 00:55:51,289 --> 00:55:52,358 It was night. 777 00:55:54,489 --> 00:55:55,842 And it was raining. 778 00:55:56,489 --> 00:55:57,842 You've been very wise. 779 00:55:58,009 --> 00:56:02,400 Kay, please. If Serleena tak es the Light, it's the end of our world. 780 00:56:03,009 --> 00:56:06,206 If we extend protection for the Light beyond Earth... 781 00:56:06,369 --> 00:56:09,566 ... we put Earth in jeopardy. We must remain neutral. 782 00:56:09,769 --> 00:56:12,203 - Where is it? - We're neutral, remember? 783 00:56:12,409 --> 00:56:14,525 If you want it, go get it. 784 00:56:18,569 --> 00:56:20,002 No! 785 00:56:47,969 --> 00:56:50,164 And so never knowing it happened... 786 00:56:50,329 --> 00:56:53,127 ... the people of Earth were once again saved... 787 00:56:53,289 --> 00:56:56,326 ... by a secret society of protectors... 788 00:56:57,369 --> 00:56:58,961 I shouldn't have. 789 00:56:59,889 --> 00:57:02,244 You never sent it off the planet. 790 00:57:03,289 --> 00:57:04,642 You hid it here. 791 00:57:06,569 --> 00:57:07,922 The worm guys. 792 00:57:11,929 --> 00:57:14,602 Are you one of Newton's friends from therapy? 793 00:57:14,769 --> 00:57:19,081 - Yes, ma'am, I am. Look here, please. - Would you like some mini-pizz...? 794 00:57:20,049 --> 00:57:21,607 A neuralyz... 795 00:57:22,609 --> 00:57:26,045 Okay, first, get some contact lenses. 796 00:57:26,209 --> 00:57:28,404 Joints look like they pick up cable. 797 00:57:28,569 --> 00:57:32,960 Second, take her to Cambodia. Get her lobster. Pay more than a dollar. 798 00:57:33,129 --> 00:57:36,326 Third, the second y'all get back from Cambodia... 799 00:57:36,489 --> 00:57:39,367 ...move your bum ass out of your mom's house. 800 00:57:39,529 --> 00:57:41,838 - Let's go. - Boy, you like 40 years old. 801 00:57:42,009 --> 00:57:44,204 - Agent Jay? - All right, all right. 802 00:57:44,369 --> 00:57:48,203 And there ain't no such thing as aliens or Men in Black. 803 00:57:54,169 --> 00:57:57,241 - You wanna go to Cambodia? - Yeah. 804 00:57:59,289 --> 00:58:00,642 Hey, Mom? 805 00:58:01,209 --> 00:58:03,200 Communicator, Jay. 806 00:58:04,049 --> 00:58:06,722 - Laura, it's me. - Jay, we're playing Twister. 807 00:58:06,889 --> 00:58:08,641 What's up, Jay? 808 00:58:08,809 --> 00:58:11,926 - Quit touching my butt! - I thought it was your face. 809 00:58:12,089 --> 00:58:15,001 They're good at this. They don't have spines. 810 00:58:15,169 --> 00:58:18,002 They were telling me about Oprah, from Chicago. 811 00:58:18,169 --> 00:58:21,286 Maybe landed in Chicago. 812 00:58:21,889 --> 00:58:24,323 - Are you wearing a bracelet? -Yeah. 813 00:58:24,489 --> 00:58:25,478 Is it glowing? 814 00:58:30,409 --> 00:58:33,287 - It's never done that before. - We're on our way. 815 00:58:33,449 --> 00:58:34,882 Communicator, Frank. 816 00:58:35,209 --> 00:58:40,488 Deactivate the lockdown. We're headed to the worm guys. We found the Light. 817 00:58:40,649 --> 00:58:43,288 Got it, Jay. Scrad? 818 00:58:43,449 --> 00:58:44,518 Bitch. 819 00:58:44,689 --> 00:58:46,520 Why didn't you say I love you? 820 00:58:46,689 --> 00:58:51,126 - He's a dog. I don't even like him. - No, the girl. You're sweet on her. 821 00:58:51,289 --> 00:58:54,326 That's why you didn't neuralyze her. You got emotionally involved. 822 00:58:54,489 --> 00:58:58,801 - Like you did with Lauranna? - I put the entire planet in danger. 823 00:58:58,969 --> 00:59:02,086 I don't want to see you making my mistakes. 824 00:59:02,249 --> 00:59:03,762 Whatever, man. 825 00:59:07,969 --> 00:59:09,118 Laura? 826 00:59:15,809 --> 00:59:16,798 Damn! 827 00:59:21,049 --> 00:59:22,926 Never stood half a chance. 828 00:59:24,129 --> 00:59:25,164 Oh, boy. 829 00:59:26,249 --> 00:59:28,205 That's gonna leave a scar. 830 00:59:29,529 --> 00:59:31,281 - Where's Laura? - MiB headquarters. 831 00:59:31,449 --> 00:59:34,441 - Some dumb two-headed guy. - They got the bracelet. 832 00:59:34,609 --> 00:59:37,282 We got 39 minutes. You guys... 833 00:59:37,449 --> 00:59:39,519 ...pull yourselves together. 834 00:59:40,209 --> 00:59:41,244 Damn. 835 00:59:42,569 --> 00:59:44,560 That's feeling better. 836 00:59:44,729 --> 00:59:47,368 - Hey, guys, wait up! - Let me grab my drink! 837 00:59:47,529 --> 00:59:49,440 Serleena has the bracelet. Why take Laura? 838 00:59:49,609 --> 00:59:50,724 She also wants me. 839 00:59:50,889 --> 00:59:54,086 - What's the book say? - We're off book. I say split some wigs. 840 00:59:54,249 --> 00:59:56,365 - We need wig-splitting weapons. - Got them. 841 01:00:01,689 --> 01:00:04,647 Paw Paw's coming to visit me. Hello, Paw Paw. 842 01:00:04,809 --> 01:00:07,687 Paw Paw and ZuZu love to see what's going on... 843 01:00:07,849 --> 01:00:11,249 Don't worry, folks. I used to live here. Came to pick up a few things. 844 01:00:11,249 --> 01:00:11,689 Don't worry, folks. I used to live here. Came to pick up a few things. 845 01:00:11,689 --> 01:00:12,169 Don't worry, folks. I used to live here. Came to pick up a few things. 846 01:00:15,529 --> 01:00:16,249 Nice place. 847 01:00:16,249 --> 01:00:17,364 Nice place. 848 01:00:29,329 --> 01:00:30,557 See you. 849 01:00:39,969 --> 01:00:42,642 You did not see a room full of weapons or four aliens. 850 01:00:42,809 --> 01:00:45,448 You will cherish and love each other for the rest of your lives. 851 01:00:45,609 --> 01:00:49,397 Which could be the next 28 minutes, so get to loving and cherishing. 852 01:00:49,569 --> 01:00:52,129 And she can stay up as late as she want... 853 01:00:52,289 --> 01:00:54,803 ...and have cookies and candy and stuff. 854 01:01:05,249 --> 01:01:07,365 Four minutes to launch. 855 01:01:07,529 --> 01:01:09,360 Four minutes to launch. 856 01:01:10,049 --> 01:01:13,928 -Your ship is ready. - Good. Send it to Kyloth now. 857 01:01:17,129 --> 01:01:18,323 Ready, guys? 858 01:01:18,489 --> 01:01:20,605 Lock and load, baby. 859 01:01:20,769 --> 01:01:22,361 - You ready, kid? - Kid? 860 01:01:22,529 --> 01:01:25,441 I saved the world from a Kreelon invasion. 861 01:01:25,609 --> 01:01:29,602 They're the Backstreet Boys of the universe. They throw snowballs? 862 01:01:30,329 --> 01:01:31,728 Know what you're doing? 863 01:01:31,889 --> 01:01:34,767 I'm about to attack one of the most feared aliens... 864 01:01:34,929 --> 01:01:38,080 ...with four worms and a mailman. Let's make it hot. 865 01:01:38,249 --> 01:01:39,443 No, no, wait! 866 01:01:44,969 --> 01:01:47,199 A code 101 lockdown! 867 01:01:47,369 --> 01:01:51,203 The building gets pressurized. Nothing in, nothing out. I knew that. 868 01:01:51,369 --> 01:01:53,325 Yeah, you knew. Front and centre, worms! 869 01:01:53,489 --> 01:01:54,717 You got it. 870 01:02:01,129 --> 01:02:06,408 It's about time you guys got here. That lady is causing all kinds of hell. 871 01:02:25,889 --> 01:02:29,006 Yummy. Someone I need to eat. 872 01:02:29,209 --> 01:02:32,963 Get to the launch pad. The bracelet shows the departure point. 873 01:02:33,129 --> 01:02:35,040 - Do not come back for me. - What? 874 01:02:35,209 --> 01:02:37,803 Do not come back for me. 875 01:02:41,889 --> 01:02:45,802 - Worm guys, give me some cover fire. - Too scared, can't move. 876 01:02:55,089 --> 01:02:56,238 Go! 877 01:03:06,529 --> 01:03:09,327 - Limber. - Go to subcontrol panel 7-R-Delta. 878 01:03:09,489 --> 01:03:14,768 - Shut off power so they can't take off. - Can't. Too scared. 879 01:03:15,689 --> 01:03:18,203 - That way. - Away from the bullets. 880 01:03:18,369 --> 01:03:19,927 No problem. 881 01:03:33,969 --> 01:03:35,800 Nice to see you again, Kay. 882 01:03:39,889 --> 01:03:41,845 -Three minutes to launch. - Jay! 883 01:03:42,009 --> 01:03:44,125 Three minutes to launch. 884 01:03:44,609 --> 01:03:46,008 Hello, Jay. Long time. 885 01:03:46,169 --> 01:03:48,558 Jarra! What's up, man? You look great. 886 01:03:48,729 --> 01:03:51,243 - What's it been? Five years? - And 42 days. 887 01:03:51,409 --> 01:03:53,639 You count every one when you're locked away. 888 01:03:53,689 --> 01:03:54,409 You shouldn't have tried to steal our ozone. Be there in one minute. 889 01:03:54,409 --> 01:03:54,889 You shouldn't have tried to steal our ozone. Be there in one minute. 890 01:03:54,889 --> 01:03:55,849 You shouldn't have tried to steal our ozone. Be there in one minute. 891 01:03:55,849 --> 01:03:56,329 You shouldn't have tried to steal our ozone. Be there in one minute. 892 01:03:56,329 --> 01:03:56,809 You shouldn't have tried to steal our ozone. Be there in one minute. 893 01:03:56,809 --> 01:03:57,769 You shouldn't have tried to steal our ozone. Be there in one minute. 894 01:03:58,969 --> 01:04:01,437 Over our dead titanium bodies! 895 01:04:01,609 --> 01:04:03,042 Two minutes. 896 01:04:09,409 --> 01:04:11,161 Let's play this one by ear. 897 01:04:13,849 --> 01:04:17,922 - I should have vaporized you before. - You really did love Lauranna. 898 01:04:18,089 --> 01:04:19,841 Didn't you, Kay? 899 01:04:20,169 --> 01:04:22,080 You silly little man. 900 01:04:49,169 --> 01:04:51,160 Two minutes to launch. 901 01:04:53,009 --> 01:04:54,408 Just go, I'll be fine! 902 01:04:55,169 --> 01:04:57,558 What you talking about? I'm winning. 903 01:04:57,729 --> 01:05:01,608 Jarra, you are under arrest for being that ugly... 904 01:05:01,769 --> 01:05:04,442 ...and for making that many copies. Surrender! 905 01:05:04,649 --> 01:05:06,401 I want him in pieces. 906 01:05:08,969 --> 01:05:11,199 Jarra Jr. Is going, going... 907 01:05:11,849 --> 01:05:13,601 ...gone! 908 01:05:25,729 --> 01:05:28,197 - Rectum. - Damn near killed him! 909 01:05:28,369 --> 01:05:30,087 Never get tired of that one. 910 01:05:30,249 --> 01:05:32,763 - Where do we shut off the power? - Don't know. 911 01:05:38,569 --> 01:05:42,278 - I'm fine. I'll be there in a minute. - No, he won't. 912 01:05:48,169 --> 01:05:50,285 Down to one now, Jarra! 913 01:05:59,289 --> 01:06:01,564 Thirty seconds to launch. 914 01:06:09,369 --> 01:06:11,599 Fifteen seconds to launch. 915 01:06:14,409 --> 01:06:16,445 Ten seconds to launch. 916 01:06:16,729 --> 01:06:17,923 Eight. 917 01:06:18,089 --> 01:06:19,363 Seven. 918 01:06:19,529 --> 01:06:20,848 Six. 919 01:06:21,009 --> 01:06:22,283 Five. 920 01:06:22,449 --> 01:06:23,518 Four. 921 01:06:23,689 --> 01:06:24,758 Three. 922 01:06:24,929 --> 01:06:25,998 Two. 923 01:06:27,449 --> 01:06:29,280 Launch terminated. 924 01:06:29,729 --> 01:06:33,039 - What did you mean, leave you? - Well, he took your gun. 925 01:06:33,209 --> 01:06:35,928 Cracked your head. Slammed you across the room. 926 01:06:36,089 --> 01:06:40,002 - Half the time you were on your back. - Look, that's how I fight. 927 01:06:40,689 --> 01:06:43,044 You've lost, you insignificant speck. 928 01:06:43,209 --> 01:06:46,167 You've wasted 25 years of my time, and for what? 929 01:06:46,369 --> 01:06:50,248 The total annihilation of Zartha. All because you went mushy. 930 01:06:50,409 --> 01:06:54,482 I'll give you one last chance to surrender, you slimy invertebrate. 931 01:06:54,649 --> 01:06:58,039 - What are you gonna do to stop me? - Not me. Him. 932 01:07:00,009 --> 01:07:02,204 Your flight's been cancelled. 933 01:07:08,649 --> 01:07:12,881 Shut down power. Shut down power. Buttons, buttons. I'm guessing... 934 01:07:13,049 --> 01:07:14,164 Yeah. 935 01:07:16,129 --> 01:07:18,324 - Worms! - Sorry. 936 01:07:23,169 --> 01:07:25,729 - Give me the bracelet. - I'm going with you. 937 01:07:25,889 --> 01:07:28,483 Everybody in the car. Everybody. 938 01:07:41,209 --> 01:07:43,962 This bracelet is what everybody's been after? 939 01:07:44,129 --> 01:07:45,767 It's often something small. 940 01:07:45,929 --> 01:07:49,444 It's not the Light. It tells us the departure point. 941 01:07:49,609 --> 01:07:51,725 If we don't get there in 11 minutes... 942 01:07:51,889 --> 01:07:54,847 ...that bracelet will go nuclear and destroy Earth. 943 01:07:55,009 --> 01:07:56,408 What?! 944 01:07:56,969 --> 01:07:57,958 Hello. 945 01:07:58,849 --> 01:08:00,441 - Wait. - I know what I'm doing. 946 01:08:15,289 --> 01:08:16,244 Damn. 947 01:08:17,769 --> 01:08:20,841 - Modified to hyper-speed! - Seat belts. 948 01:08:24,089 --> 01:08:25,078 What's that? 949 01:08:25,289 --> 01:08:28,565 At hyper-speed, you have to use the navigational stalk. 950 01:08:32,649 --> 01:08:37,518 Toggle switches for the ailerons. Joysticks for the stabilizer and rudder. 951 01:08:41,729 --> 01:08:43,481 I just want you to know... 952 01:08:43,649 --> 01:08:45,719 Hold on to that for one second. 953 01:08:49,129 --> 01:08:50,721 Computer, worms. 954 01:08:50,929 --> 01:08:55,719 I said, " Bitch, if you don't want me to kick your skinny Zone Diet ass... 955 01:08:55,889 --> 01:08:59,598 ...turn around and exit the planet." -Frank, where are you? 956 01:08:59,769 --> 01:09:01,168 Main hall, egg display. 957 01:09:01,329 --> 01:09:04,082 We're taking fire. Kay pushed the red button. 958 01:09:04,249 --> 01:09:07,924 Computer at MiB can destroy bogey. I'll walk you through it. 959 01:09:10,129 --> 01:09:14,600 Jay? Frank. You were the best darn partner a Remoolian could ever have. 960 01:09:15,369 --> 01:09:16,597 Godspeed. 961 01:09:18,009 --> 01:09:18,998 Frank? Frank? 962 01:09:19,969 --> 01:09:22,529 Okay, here we go, automatic pilot. 963 01:09:24,689 --> 01:09:28,682 - It is not automatic piloting. - He doesn't operate at hyper-speed. 964 01:09:28,849 --> 01:09:32,125 - I could use a steering wheel! - This is what we got. 965 01:09:33,849 --> 01:09:36,647 - Didn't you ever have a Game Boy? - What's that? 966 01:09:36,809 --> 01:09:38,288 You know what? Move. 967 01:09:39,569 --> 01:09:41,799 That is not the navigational stalk! 968 01:09:53,289 --> 01:09:55,200 Okay, straight down. 969 01:09:59,729 --> 01:10:01,082 Idiots. 970 01:10:10,729 --> 01:10:13,448 Subway may not be the best place to lose her. 971 01:10:15,689 --> 01:10:17,122 - Where is he? - He? 972 01:10:17,489 --> 01:10:18,717 Jeff. Hang on! 973 01:10:20,849 --> 01:10:21,918 Oops. 974 01:10:23,049 --> 01:10:24,164 Teeth. 975 01:10:56,689 --> 01:10:59,567 Running out of time, Kay. Where is the Light? 976 01:11:00,729 --> 01:11:02,162 Right here. 977 01:11:03,009 --> 01:11:05,159 - What? - What, I'm the Light? 978 01:11:06,009 --> 01:11:08,523 - No. No way. - You have a planet to save. 979 01:11:08,809 --> 01:11:11,164 You're mistaken. I work at a pizzeria. 980 01:11:11,329 --> 01:11:15,117 Two days ago, I was running a post office. You are who you are. 981 01:11:15,289 --> 01:11:18,247 Laura, you are the Light. 982 01:11:18,409 --> 01:11:22,004 The leader of your people. Their spirit and their hope. 983 01:11:22,169 --> 01:11:24,763 The power is within you to save a planet. 984 01:11:24,929 --> 01:11:29,639 I protected you until it was your time. Your time is now. 985 01:11:33,329 --> 01:11:36,958 You will save a world. You know things before they happen. 986 01:11:37,129 --> 01:11:39,040 - I'm a Libra. - You're Zarthan. 987 01:11:39,209 --> 01:11:43,282 - When you get sad, it rains. - Lots of people get sad when it rains. 988 01:11:43,569 --> 01:11:46,163 It rains because you're sad, baby. 989 01:12:37,209 --> 01:12:38,722 It's not fair. 990 01:12:44,409 --> 01:12:45,967 Never is. 991 01:12:47,649 --> 01:12:49,207 We are who we are... 992 01:12:49,369 --> 01:12:51,758 ...even if we sometimes forget. 993 01:13:00,809 --> 01:13:03,277 Jeff, I am so not in the mood for you! 994 01:13:03,449 --> 01:13:05,087 Get back in the subway! Now! 995 01:13:11,369 --> 01:13:12,563 That's not good. 996 01:13:14,369 --> 01:13:15,848 Wait! No! 997 01:13:17,209 --> 01:13:18,483 Jay! 998 01:13:19,209 --> 01:13:23,441 I cannot emphasize strongly enough how much we need you on that transport. 999 01:13:24,809 --> 01:13:27,004 Laura! You have to go! 1000 01:13:27,409 --> 01:13:28,728 Oh, jeez. 1001 01:13:30,689 --> 01:13:33,362 Go. He's fine. He does this all the time. 1002 01:13:34,449 --> 01:13:35,598 Nope! 1003 01:13:37,769 --> 01:13:40,567 About to lay the smackdown on your candy ass. 1004 01:13:40,929 --> 01:13:43,159 Laura! It's your destiny! 1005 01:13:43,409 --> 01:13:45,240 I was talking, Kay! 1006 01:13:46,689 --> 01:13:48,759 Hey! No biting. 1007 01:13:50,569 --> 01:13:52,844 If you don't go, we all die. 1008 01:13:55,929 --> 01:13:58,397 You're just as beautiful as your mother. 1009 01:14:04,849 --> 01:14:06,999 Kay? A little help? 1010 01:14:18,889 --> 01:14:19,958 Kay? 1011 01:14:21,609 --> 01:14:24,043 Might I suggest a bigger gun? 1012 01:14:49,489 --> 01:14:51,002 - Kid? - Yeah. 1013 01:14:51,449 --> 01:14:54,646 - Thanks for bringing me back. - No problem. 1014 01:14:55,249 --> 01:14:56,728 Why didn't you tell me? 1015 01:14:56,889 --> 01:14:58,880 Would you have let her go? 1016 01:15:19,449 --> 01:15:23,158 So, what's it like on the outside? Not doing this every day? 1017 01:15:23,329 --> 01:15:24,728 It's nice. 1018 01:15:24,889 --> 01:15:28,518 Sleep late on the weekends. Watch the Weather Channel. 1019 01:15:31,889 --> 01:15:33,925 I did miss this city. 1020 01:15:35,129 --> 01:15:38,485 So Laura is Princess Lauranna's daughter. 1021 01:15:40,329 --> 01:15:43,560 - Did y'all...? - MiB's a mess. Let's go, kid. 1022 01:15:44,329 --> 01:15:45,523 Let's go? 1023 01:15:45,689 --> 01:15:49,762 Thousands of people in New York and New Jersey saw our little event. 1024 01:15:49,929 --> 01:15:54,127 Plan needs to be thought out. Plan needs to be cool. What you...? 1025 01:15:58,689 --> 01:16:00,566 Kid, I'll get you trained yet. 1026 01:16:00,729 --> 01:16:02,208 I want one of those. 1027 01:16:02,369 --> 01:16:03,563 Damn! 1028 01:16:08,209 --> 01:16:09,358 - Hey. - Hey. 1029 01:16:09,529 --> 01:16:11,838 - How you doing? - I'm good. 1030 01:16:12,009 --> 01:16:16,366 We've all been there. The girl is gone and it hurts. Wanna talk? 1031 01:16:16,529 --> 01:16:17,962 - No. - I can help. 1032 01:16:18,129 --> 01:16:19,118 No. 1033 01:16:19,289 --> 01:16:20,278 Still sulking? 1034 01:16:20,449 --> 01:16:21,438 - No. - Yeah. 1035 01:16:21,609 --> 01:16:25,682 You miss her. It happens to all of us. I knew this hot young thing. 1036 01:16:25,849 --> 01:16:29,285 When our bodies were in the positions of the Kamasutra... 1037 01:16:29,449 --> 01:16:30,723 Zed! 1038 01:16:31,129 --> 01:16:32,926 Come on, man! Damn! 1039 01:16:33,289 --> 01:16:34,927 I'll tell you about dames. 1040 01:16:35,089 --> 01:16:38,525 They say they want to be scratched, but they really want: 1041 01:16:38,729 --> 01:16:40,287 Hey! Frank. 1042 01:16:40,489 --> 01:16:43,049 What? Still sitting shiva? Want my advice? 1043 01:16:43,209 --> 01:16:45,040 No. No advice. 1044 01:16:45,209 --> 01:16:46,722 No talking. 1045 01:16:47,289 --> 01:16:48,517 Hell, no. 1046 01:16:48,689 --> 01:16:51,249 Fellas, I swear, I'm fine. 1047 01:16:52,169 --> 01:16:54,888 All hail Jay! All hail Jay! 1048 01:16:55,329 --> 01:16:58,799 - I brought them from Grand Central. - Why put them in my locker? 1049 01:16:58,969 --> 01:17:01,199 I thought it would put things in perspective. 1050 01:17:01,369 --> 01:17:03,963 It's kind of sad. We need to let them out. 1051 01:17:04,129 --> 01:17:07,166 They need to know the world is bigger than that. 1052 01:17:07,329 --> 01:17:08,762 Still a rookie. 1053 01:17:11,849 --> 01:17:12,964 Whoa. 1054 01:17:13,305 --> 01:18:13,151 Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/9te Help other users to choose the best subtitles